My wife is a little chunky, not fat, maybe 20 pounds or so overweight. Could this be a problem with a low sex drive? To me I don't care about the weight, I love her and the way she looks, she is no slim model, but she is beautiful and I love to touch her body. I allways tell her so. So are women more hung up on weight than men? And what can I do to make her feel more comfortable with herself?
2006-06-16 03:35:48 · 19 answers · asked by Andy S 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Andy S. , you are a good man
and very sweet to your wife
its awesome that you love her for who she is and not how she looks!
it may be the weight for her
it may also just be a little slump she's going through, just not wanting sex.
try doing something for her that makes her feel good, like going dancing or getting her flowers...just something you haven't done in a while that will make her happy.
or start parading around your house naked holding signs that say "i want more sex!"
or do what ol dude up there ^ said about the chubby porn, i think it'd be funny!
2006-06-16 03:44:29 · answer #1 · answered by Cap'n Donna 7 · 13⤊ 3⤋
Weight is an issue for lots of women. And yes, it could have something to do with her low sex drive but maybe not. Maybe she just don't like sex as much or yes maybe she's uncomfortable w/her body... Just keep doing what your doing... and asking her and what's wrong would help and if it is the weight offer to work w/her if it's making her uncomfortable. Be nice and give her compliments, that always makes a woman feel good.
2006-06-16 03:45:06 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, unfortunately, society makes women way more insecure about weight than men. She might be a little insecure about her body and that can turn her sex drive off and make her uncomfortable with her own body. Realize it's not you at all. But at the same time, it's something that needs to be corrected. 20 lbs is nothing and she can lose it no problem at all... just talk to her about it even though it's a touchy subject, a marriage is far more important.
2006-06-16 03:40:53 · answer #3 · answered by Cupid 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Women tend to be selfconcious about weight because men tend to gravitate to skinny women. She is probably afraid to let you see her naked body for fear you will be repulsed and start looking for a sleeker model. Do things to help her feel more comfortable about her body and until then do a lot of love making in the dark. Also, comments about how some other women are too skinny can never hurt.
2006-06-16 03:43:31 · answer #4 · answered by MJL613 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes! it probably has a lot to do with her sex drive ... I am also a little over weight and my exhusband would tell me that he loved the way I looked. I was never comfortable with it though. You are doing the right thing to tell her that you love her just the way she is, but also tell her if she feels that uncomfortable with it .. that you are willing to support and encourage her to lose it. Go bike riding, go for walks or do sit-ups together. My most awkward moments were if he could see my stomache when we made love. So figure something out where she don't have to show her stomach so often. I hope it works out for you.... remember to communicate and encourage her to talk.
2006-06-16 03:42:33 · answer #5 · answered by Jacqueline D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She wants to be 'special' for you and she is now having a problem with her weight, and regretting it, because she has low self esteem, and is looking down on herself, as not being good enough for you anymore.
No matter what you do, she is not going to feel any better, so the best thing is for both of you to go into counceling, that way, you can help her and she can see that she is being foolish in her need to be a slim model type, and that you love her just the way she is.
Women... strange creatures, but we gotta love em cause they are sooooo special !!
I wish you well..
Jesse
2006-06-16 03:40:24 · answer #6 · answered by x 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes women can get pretty hung up on weight and their husbands weight too As far as making her comfortable she probably isn't going to believe your statements about her weight shes got to lose the weight to feel better about herself....Perhaps you guys could go for walks together even if you don't have any weight to lose the quality time is great and the exercise will at the very least make her feel like shes taking a step in the right direction
2006-06-16 03:40:13 · answer #7 · answered by laura468 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Women are basically insecure about their weight. She could be avoiding sex because she doesn't feel good about the way she looks. Just keep reassuring her that you think she is hot. You could both start being more active - take walks, go swimming, etc. If she feels more attractive, I think she will want to be intimate more often.
2006-06-16 03:55:05 · answer #8 · answered by lavenderroseford 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i have the same problem myself, and my wife tells me exactly what u tell yours. i'm learning that you have to love urself before anyone else can convince u that u look good. all u can do is support her, and keep loving her. keep telling her she's beautiful and sexy. it starts to sink in eventually, trust me. most of all, keep proving it by touching her, and making her feel beautiful. it sounds to me like u've discovered that actions speak louder than words. have patience. she'll come around. as a woman w/low self esteem myself, i can tell u, the female ego is just as soft and bruisable as the male's. maybe even more so, bc of all the expectations that society places on us to all be waif thin and starving. it's wonderful that u love her as she is, the world needs more men like urself, and i applaud u.
2006-06-16 03:58:02 · answer #9 · answered by kelleygaither2000 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
as long as she is comfortable with herself, thats good. Just keep reassuring her, and don't comment on slim women. Comment on how nice "chunky" women are,,,like on tv or something.
2006-06-16 03:40:21 · answer #10 · answered by Molly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can tell you right now as a guy that men are more prejudice about this than women. I promise you! Women are a lot less shallow in this area.
2006-06-16 03:38:48 · answer #11 · answered by 10292K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋