im 19 already maried, i need advice!!!!!!!!!?

Question

i love him dearly. but we have been fighting since we got married (married 8 months) he has the WORST temper and he scares me he gets mad when i cry. i love him but he hurts me sooo much

Answer 1

There are lots of things to consider here and I'm not about to counsel someone we know nothing about.

There are so many questions that need answers before advice can be given.

So, here's the cliff notes version:

Do you have regular romantic intercourse?
Passionate men often turn violent when they are robbed of their intimate other's attention.

What has changed since you got married?
He may resent you for something you didn't do. Men sometimes want to please their wives so much that they deprive themselves of other activities. For instance, has he been out with his friends much?

Does he have secrets???
Get a sample of his handwriting and look at the "o". If his o's have two loops at the top that intersect, he has the liar trait and is keeping something secret from you bye lying.

Reason I tell you this, is often, men turn violent when they are lying about something. The tension from trying to keep it a secret and the unhappiness from not being able to live the way they want makes them crazy.

He gets mad when you cry because of his own insecurities about the relationship. He sees your tears as weakness. Perhaps you need to stand up for yourself. Shouting and argueing do very little, so take action. Make rules and make them stick. (you may want to experiment being the agressor in the bedroom. grab him, force him, make him the submissive once in a while. He'll see you as an equal then)


I know, from my own experiences.

Cheers darling and good luck.

Answer 2

If you really want to stay then get counseling, if he won't go then leave. If he ever hits you get out. He can't stand to see you cry because he knows he has hurt you but he can't help himself. Let me tell you from experience don't stay just because you have only been married a short time. Be happy in life I wish I could go back and do it again. The hurt is mental abuse he may as well be beating you. Because no one deserves that. In the end if it continues you will come to hate him. If there are no kids yet please resolve this before they become involved because when there are kids it is a different thing and harder to get out.

Answer 3

There must be something wrong with both of U. There nust be a reason why your hubby become hot tempered. Is there something he does not satisfied with? To solve your problem, U need to understand your husband better and knows what he likes and dislikes. Try to be intimate with him. get together more often sexually. Talk to him and make him happy. Never bring up the past subject which he is not interested in. Worst.....Don't nagged...Nobody likes it ...very irritating. Build up loving relationship with him. Always CARE and SHARE.Always smile to your hubby when U see him. Give him a kiss.

Answer 4

You are nineteen and married already, why you are still a baby yourself, and don't try to tell me otherwise cos it won't work. Love is not hurting, intentionally, the person you intend to spend the rest of your life with, it's sharing, caring, communication, you needs, his needs, laughter and fun. Swallow your pride and return to your parents, work on your self esteem, education and don't allow anyone to walk over you. Good luck.
This is for Blitz...you re a cruel hurtful person...what goes around comes around, I hope you remember that when you are laying broken and bleeding on a hospital bed.

Answer 5

Why is it that after we get married, men seem to change? Why is he getting angry? Anger is a secondary emotion, so what is he really feeling? Usually it's either hurt or fear, and with men it's usually fear. They don't want people to see it, so they get mad and hit things. Try talking to him, but remember love is not about being scared. How can you remain married to someone you fear? AND, if he EVER hits you, once is enough!!!

Answer 6

Get a divorce, you got married way too young, next live your life a little your barely an adult. Don't think about till your mid to late 20's. Live your life for you for awhile. Also next time don't go with just emotions try to find out who you really are getting.

Answer 7

If this is how you feel now and he is hurting you and yelling at you, you had best seek some professional advice. Then is they suggest it's ok, ask your mate to join you. Sounds like an abusive relationship to me. No female deserves and *** for a mate. Get help now, before it's too late

Answer 8

i feel as though, you know what you need to do. we know what you tell us, but we don't know what happens behind closed doors. i think that you should really weigh the pros's and con's of your marriage. if you feel with every bone in your body that this is the man for you, and that you really wanna spend the rest of your life with him, then by all means get counseling together. if both of you are not in counseling, that will not help. if you are so scared that you feel you can't tell him how you feel, then maybe you should reconsider. i have been there with the father of my child because i loved him so, but i have learned that sometimes you have to let go. if you are trying to help them all the time, they Will never help themselves, or want to help themselves, thus they will never change.

Answer 9

Well get the f u . . out of that love dont matter when your unhappy afraid or in the hospital its not gonna help you at all get yourself a bigger boyfreind thats not an as s h ol e and get that guy out of yor lfe before he ends yours . If its bad enough to be asking its bad enough to be leaving trust me im a guy with a temper too dont live your life with volence in your life . it will ruin yours.shag themarrage

Answer 10

Wow, and you knew nothing about this before you got married?? Seems to me there would have been a fight before the big day!! Well try talking to him or seem a marrage counselor