I love my boy friend and I am pretty much attracted to him we have been together for 13 months, but I have also just had a baby 18 months ago and tht excuse to get out of having sex it definatly starting to wear thin. I just want to know if any one has any other suggestions?????
2006-06-16 02:48:47 · 15 answers · asked by cherri 2 in Health ➔ General Health Care ➔ Other - General Health Care
Are you willing to have sex with some one else if a chance is presented right now or you feel indifferent toward the idea?
If you answer yes then it is psychological (some thing turns you off about him), but if your answer is no then it could be physiological (hormones),drug side effect (antidepressants),or mechanical ( the actual act of sex is painful).
2006-06-16 03:25:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Eighteen months is too long for this to be a physical reason. You also didn't indicate that there was any physical discomfort. It sounds more like a psychological problem. Speak to your family doctor about a referral to a phsychiatrist that can help. It could be you have resentment toward your husband for one reason or another, and a phsychiatrist could help you deal with those issues. You might also have body image issues, though your husband wanting sex should reassure you that it's just in your head.
But also, you might consider just going along with your husband's desires. If you're never in the mood, but once you get going you have fun doing it, why not just give in and do it? It could be that going through "the motions" will help you break the cycle of lack of desire. Plus, isn't your husband in a better mood afterwards? Isn't pleasing him reason enough to give it a try?
2006-06-16 09:59:40 · answer #2 · answered by Neerdowellian 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't mean to sound rude, but if you plan to hang onto your boyfriend you'll need to have sex with him at some point. It is, after all, an integral part of any relationship. Maybe you have some friends you could talk to about this. Not having the desire to have sex with an attractive man for over 13 months seems a little unusual.
2006-06-16 09:55:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on what is causing the problem. Sometimes its hormone changes from pregnancy, fear of getting pregnant again or hurt feelings that weren't discussed but buried. This usually causes underlying resentments that make it hard to want to have sex. See a health professional I am sure they can help, a gynecologist. Or if your partner is not making sex satisfying for you too. I was surprised at how many women don't have orgasms during sex and it went on for years and they didn't say anything to their partner. There is help for that too. Good Luck!!!
2006-06-16 09:57:14 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Demi is right in saying that if your bf loves you he will wait until you are ready. It is hard after you have a baby to get back into the swing of things. Are you taking any medications for depression or otherwise? They can affect your sex drive. If not, ask your OB/GYN for help. There are OTC things to help, and also prescription meds that can get you where you want to be. I wish you luck, and congratulations for baby! Take care.
2006-06-16 09:54:54 · answer #5 · answered by polishedamethyst 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You might want to see about a therapist. It seems to me that you have some emotional issues stemming from the birth of your child. It could be a number of things. Don't feel singled out though. This is a farely common problem having to do with the subconscious mind.
2006-06-16 09:56:34 · answer #6 · answered by Michael F 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Better to consult a doctor first, preferably you ob-gyne. There are many causes why a person lose interest in sex prematurely. It could be hormonal imbalance, vitamin and mineral deficiency ( especially when you are still nursing a baby) and stress.
2006-06-16 10:06:04 · answer #7 · answered by neri 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know with anew baby that your life has changed a litlle and you attention is divided so what you have to do is set time aside for each other and fall back in love
2006-06-16 09:56:19 · answer #8 · answered by mmmkay_us 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that your body is taking longer to get healed then you would have thought.
Explain that your body is still in some type of pain (maybe when you urinate or have your period) and that it is still painful and that you are cramping almost everyday.
Having sex right now when you are still in pain is not going to make it better; but, worse.
2006-06-16 09:53:43 · answer #9 · answered by uchaboo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Change your boyfriend. If you love your boyfriend and you don't want to have sex with him then you donot have a romantic love towards him. You have a brotherly sisterly love. There are three different types of love you know. fatherly/Motherly/Godly, Brotherly/Sisterly and Romantic love.
2006-06-16 09:56:04 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋