i am pregrent with my 2 child. my husband does not help me and i am jobless. my office male collegue helps me?

Question

a lot and calls me to find out how i am and my health. he sometimes gives me gift also. Is there any harm if this friend of mine takes some care of me. my husband is very demanding in sex and he has to be pleased every day which i do not like

Answer 1

You picked him, you married him, you made two babies with him. Something must have been right for you to go this far with the husband. I imagine he didn't change overnight. Unless your marriage vows meant nothing to you, you have a duty to him and to your kids (especially since you stay at home). And as for the other guy, the office mate, I wouldn't even give him the time of day. Any man that is willing to take advantage of a woman in the vulnerable state of preganacy sounds like a predator to me. Keep your head up and remember who and why you got married. You're sensitive and vulnerable right now don't let that distract you from what you know you need to do.

Answer 2

I do recommend a divorce but I don't recommend another relationship right away. You cannot have healthy relationships if you jump from one to another.

You are carrying dead weight with your current husband and if he won't or can't change, divorce is your only option. You don't want your children to see this is acceptable behavior.

As for the guy at the office...I know he is nice but you should really be single for a while to have some clear insight into his intentions. He may be a guy who truly cares about you and wants to take care of you or he may be a guy that sees you are currently a victim in your relationship and wants to make you his own victim (keep your children's welfare in mind). I know that right now it is hard for you to see him being that type of person but until you are out of your current relationship for a little while you cannot see things clearly. Not just you but anyone in a relationship looking at the possibility of another.

It isn't wise to look for another man to supplement the income you need when divorcing your husband, you can get child support and alimony in addition to help from the state you live in (WIC, taniff, food stamps, housing assistance, etc.). Talk to your local welfare office to see what you can qualify for but I am thinking it would be a lot since you don't have a job and have 1 1/2 kids.

Good luck and remember that whatever obsticles you come up against, you are strong and can overcome them.

Answer 3

Whoa girl!!! It sounds like your husband is a damn bum! And you still give him sex!? He sounds like a drunk or something. If he beats you up, tell me now so I can go over there with some of my guy friends and chop his head off - the little one that does all the thinking. Well, you have a nice friend at work I'd say. Try to have a sweet talk with that husband of yours, and hopefully find a comprimise; that he gets a job, helps support his own bloodline, and treat you like a lady with respect or else he is OUT. He does not deserve you and your kids, and your kids need a decent role-model. If he's still an ***, then divorce him and get to know that man at work a little better, just as friends first. I hope you figure it out. Good luck.

Answer 4

I am sorry that your husband doesn't help you more. I wish I knew how to motivate him to be a little more considerate! One thing that you might ask him to do with more success than other things is to take over some of the childrearing time with your oldest. You can cast it as playing with the child, if you want to avoid making it seem like work ;P

If he can manage an hour in the morning and an hour at night, that would give you a nice, predictable break. You could let him know that the easier the day has been for you, the more amorous you are going to feel. Low stress for mom = hot love for dad, in other words. (That may be more information than you wanted @LOL!)

Best wishes to you, and God bless.

Answer 5

I think you're fortunate that a colleague is looking out for you, but your husband sounds pretty typical of 60% of husbands throughout the world. Does nothing to help and wants you for sex. Sounds like if hubby found out about your friend, he'd hit the roof. I don't think there's any harm in continuing, but take care it doesn't go too far, if you know what I mean. Marriage doesn't have to mean a failed life. If you don't like your situation, change it. But if (for example) money is an issue, or you have no family support or no freedom to change things, you'll have to go on satisfying hubby. Hope things work out for you.

Answer 6

i know what ur thinking. the work collegue can b just a friend. dont lie to urself. u imagine u and him r together instead of u and ur husband. this man at ur work may b trying to help u but he will only make ur life worse when ur husband finds out. and he will find out, they always do. do not allow the work man to b n e thing more than a friend. and do not b alone with him. if u want this guy at ur work, u need to properly divorce ur husband. im sorry ur children r in this homelife. kids arent stupid, they pay a lot more attention to ur life than u think.

Answer 7

you need to make it a point that you don't like it and if he doesn't change you WILL leave. don't be subtle and just leave......i was the same way with my EX. something will have to give or it won't last. If you guys do end up splitting DO NOT be stupid, it maybe you are just young and need a brief break. my ex was stupid and got pregnant almost immediatly after broke up. when she tried to get back with me, all hope was lost between us because of this.
sorry gave me a flashback...i hope this helped

Answer 8

Get a divorce then or you will stay pregnant. You deserve to be treated better, maybe your office collegue can pay for it and help you raise both children

Answer 9

you need to talk to your husband unless you want him to continue treating you like that. ooh, by the way if you have this friend of yours who helped you out alot, are looking for him to take your husband's place. it sound like it, I don't mean to sound mean, but if you don't want something to come out of it you should keep a distance.

peace.

Answer 10

You need to Free Your Self,