My wife and I recently separated...?

Question

She was dating a man while we were in the process of separating (we were still living together while this was going on). She wanted to split not me - I was willing to work it out because I believe in my marriage vows but she wasn't willing to do so. Now I have since moved out. Recently I have been receiving hang-up calls on my cell from the town in which the boyfriend lives. And I recently provided my wife with my new number (because of the kids visits) and the day after I received several hang-up calls from the same area code where her boyfriend lives! I am confused as to why she would want a divorce and then proceed to harass me by either having him (or someone from that town) call my house or by using a calling card from the town so as to make it appear that someone from his town is calling. I know it is not a coincidence because the calls started the exact day after I gave her my new number. What the heck does this mean and how should I approach dealing with this situation?

Answer 1

Its a very juvenile person doing this.............Its more than likely her.......dont answer the calls. Play on her emotions or his whoever is doing this. If its about the kids, the person would leave a message if its relevent. Dont jump to answer it thats what they want you to do. Go on about your business, obviously she has....even though she is trying to some how control you. Bama

Answer 2

I'm a female whose been thru the same situation after a 30 yr marriage. He wanted us both and after dealing with his being with so many females over the years, this younger one was the straw that broke the camel's back as the saying goes. So, I let go and they are together, and he's been trying to get me back every since he saw that I really was finished. So, your wife has realized that she can't have you both, but don't want to totally let go. She could be calling to make sure there's no replacement at this point, or he could be calling to make sure she's not meeting you when he's not around. Think about it! there will NEVER be any trust there, and it's just as well for the way they got together. You may find it easier to go on to the next level of your life with someone else, which would be good once the divorce is complete. Unfortunately, I decided to keep busy with a new career to keep busy and have things work out for me and my family. She's banking on your still wanting to stay in your marriage, so, you need to make a decision on if you're going to wait for her to get tired of him. Believe me, they are going to be miserable from what I've noticed with my Ex and his chosen one. Now, I only say my prayers for him to be happy with his forced choice. Wish you luck

Answer 3

Depending on what state you live in, you can get the phone records from either just going to the phone company and asking what number the hang-ups are comming from, or go to the police and they can get the records from the phone company.

Divorce is always hard, especially with kids involved. Just hang in there, and try not to fight too much in front of the kids.

Good Luck.

P.S. Start dating again yourself. Nothing puts an ex-wife out of your mind like a new girlfriend.
(Plus it might make the ex-wife jellous enough to think about coming back - but be VERY VERY careful about taking her back. If she messes around on you once, she WILL do it again. Better to let the next guy have that problem.)

Been there, done that......twice!!.....how stupid am I???

Answer 4

Your wife is trying to get under your skin. She has already decided that she can't respect you. Her opinion of you is as low as it can go. Nothing you say to her will mean anything. So stop. Move on with your life. Change the number or block that phone number. Be as unemotional as you can, and keep your hurt and anger hidden from that cheap 'ho and her new butthead lover. There is nothing you can do but take good care of yourself. Women do this every day .. they blame their husbands for their unhappiness. So, amigo, it is your fault that she is miserable and you are the one who drove her to commit adultery. Just ask her.

Get good legal advice and prepare to move on with your life. If you are lucky, the 'ho will calm down after a while when she finds tthat you aren't fighting her or challenging her anymore, and might even end up being a decent co-parent. This stuff that is happening to you happens every day when a woman or man decides that the cause of unhappiness is the spouse. Take my advice - only you can find a way to make you happy.

Answer 5

Just because you don't know who's calling doesn't mean you can't report harassment. If a number is showing up on your caller ID, the police can trace it to find out who it belongs to. You could also try to find out yourself by using a reverse lookup search engine, like the one below:

http://www.anywho.com/rl.html

Definitely give the police a ring if the calls persist - good luck!

Answer 6

Maybe she's dilemma and has not really know what she wants. Give her some break and talk to her again when she's ready.

Perhaps you should also need to know what went wrong with your marriage? Is it you have no time for her, no sexuality desire or no communication at all?? Find the answers.

Whatever it is, I hope she will comes back to you.

Answer 7

You are dealing with an insane bunch of people..get a new number and go after custody of the kid(s).

Answer 8

You need to talk to her about whats been going on and ask her why her/her bf are calling your phone. Just be honest with her and ask her whats going on with her. Honesty is the best way to go - just be straightforward with her.

Answer 9

either it means that she really didnt want to end it with you ..or shes just trying to rub in your face that shes already found someone new and has moved on while you havent..

Answer 10

They are being inmature, but hang in there and do not let her know it bothers you and it will die down when she thinks it is not fun anymore.