17 weeks and depressed?

Question

I am 19 years old, and this is my first pregnancy. I'm happy with my SO, we wanted to have a baby and we're both ready for it, but for some reason I find myself depressed, like I'm going to fail miserably at motherhood. I'm worried about everything, and every time I make mistakes it makes me cry and think I'm a horrible person. Part of me thinks maybe I am not ready for this, but at this point there's no backing down (definitely don't believe in abortion/adoption for this situation). Is it normal to have these feelings of self-doubt and depression?

I might add that I've had no desire to do Anything at all, besides sleep and eat and cry...

Answer 1

I am not a woman, I am a father X4 and grandfather X6 and in my experience, it sounds like you are pregnant with your first child. Seriously, everything you are talking about my wife and I went through. If you want the child, and it sounds like you do, you will do fine. Every time we face something new, most of us have some degree of misgiving. We have concerns about entering a new grade level in school, facing a new teacher, interviewing for a new job, getting a promotion at work, getting a drivers license, having to go to traffic court, or having our first child. BTW, you probably will make mistakes, we all do and more times than not, we all survive the experience.

I think I might even be able to help with your second paragraph. Find a book about being pregnant with lots of pictures. If it is like many I have seen it will go week by week and explain what is happening to the baby and to mom. Trust me, when you get into the book you will find out just how messed up a pregnancy makes your body. The hormone imbalances make puberty seem like walk in the park, or a drive to the mall.

Do make sure you see a Dr. and follow his/her instructions. Prenatal care is so very important to everyone’s health, and that includes your SO. Who, by the way, should be included in every phase. Your body needs things right now and it is much more important for the baby than it is for you. Take good care of yourself and your baby, the rest will come along OK. It isn't all natural but with a little study before birth and a serious effort after, you will have a good kid and they will thank you some day.

Good luck and best wishes.

Answer 2

You are on a ship sailing away from the known shores of your "childhood" heading to a new world that you've never been to before and you will never be able to sail back to the old world again. Who wouldn't cry and have self doubt? When you reach the "new world" it will be different but you will take one day at a time and thrive and never be able to imagine how you were ever satisfied in the old world - it was so one dimensional - all about ME. Now relax and let life bring on what it may. You're on a wonderful adventure. Nothing will ever be the same again...it will be BETTER and you will be better. I have had five and I am SUCH a swell person and it's all because of what raising my children made me become. (All I did when I was pregnant for the first time was eat and sleep and cry too.) Just take one day at a time. You're on a great adventure - it's called womanhood...it's called adulthood! If it really gets too much to bear talk to your doctor about what's going on with your hormones. They have dealt with a LOT of pregnancies. Put them to work for you.

Answer 3

I would see a doctor but...

I think it is completely normal for someone who wants a child and is pregnant to be scared out of their mind. I was...I just occupied my time with buying things that baby needed or registering with every store I could. You will have to accept that you are normal in feeling scared right now and know that as long as you love your baby you will do the best possible for it.

I still have self-doubt and my son is 2 1/2. I am a crazy perfectionist and worry about everything, but for me I consider it my mommy duty and just accept that my mommy duty will keep him happy and healthy.

If YOU (not some weirdo) need to talk...IM me, I am chrissy757 on yahoo.

Take care and don't worry, you will be a great mom because you want to be. There will be mishaps along the way but you are fine.

Answer 4

It is definitely normal. Your body is going through a roller coaster right now with all the hormonal changes in your body. I felt the same way with my first baby. When we left the hospital I remember saying to my SO..."They're letting us take the baby home? Are they crazy? Don't they know that we have no clue what we're doing?"

NO ONE- Not even your mother (or his for that matter) got their child with an instruction manual. Quite honestly I would be rather concerned if you did not have these doubts.

Talk to your doctor about these feelings of depression. Although he/she will not be able to prescribe anything at this point, they will be able to refer you to support groups, and professional help if you need it.

Just so you know... with both my kids all I felt like doing was sleeping, eating and crying, and I wasn't clinically depressed. and I was extremely more sure of myself with my second.

Good luck

Blessed be

Answer 5

Do not despair. I have a 10 month old son who was planned. Despite the planning and desire to have this baby I was very despressed for the first few months. I attributited this to the change of hormone levels, change of lifestyle, fear of the unknown, and possibly poor nutrition. Pregnancy also has a way of making you reevaluate your life and focus on whats best for the baby and not everyone in your life will be on board with these sudden changes even yourself. By the end of the second trimester I started to feel better. All women are different. I would recommend sharing your concerns with you ob/gyn or midwife. Trust me they wont think your crazy and they may have some suggestions to help you deal with these feelings.

Answer 6

well i would say you need to go to the doctor because you are oviously having a really bad hormone problem, its actully all the signs of depression but because your pregnant im pretty sure that is the reason why your so emtional, i've not had a really bad depresseive stage during my pregnancy yet im 35 weeks and i was also on anti depressents for over 4 years when i fell pregnant, but i guess i am on of the lucky ones that didn't get effect to much by hormones i didn't have morningsickness or cravings either. when you have your next check up talk to your doctor about it, he/she may want refere you to a counsellor. If you start to feel even more down before your next appoitment then you might want to ring and bring the appoitment forward

Answer 7

You are going to be fine...That is your hormones going crazy....it's normal but I would tell my ob/gyn and see if there is anything they can do for you.....You are experiencing what hundreds of women do..You will be up one day and down the other...Your body has taken on a change and it is telling you so.....But you will be a mother soon !! and there is nothing better than giving birth...........When you do, try and have it Normal without drugs , yes it will hurt but it will be well worth the pain . It will be an experience you will never forget ..I guarantee it!!!!! Take Lamaze courses and they will teach you how to breath with your contractions and your "SO" can be your coach..Good Luck..Hope I have been of some help.......I have had four children and everyone of them was normal delivery , NO Drugs I didn't want to miss a minute of it ......and two of them were breech births

Answer 8

I'm 19 and i got pregnant right as i turned 17, i wasn't as happy when i first get pregnant either. but it got better, but I'm sure you'll do okay. take my word for it and exercise instead of laying there. Being a first time parent your bound to make mistakes, and you wont fail at motherhood.Best of luck to you. Congratulations on your pregnancy

Answer 9

Don't worry, it's all normal... just don't let it get out of hand. Your in uncharted waters, a total unknown to you.... parents grow with their children hon... trust me I have 5.... I was right in your boat, 19 pregnant with my first, I'm 31 and my baby just turned 4... there are still things I don't know, situations I don't know how to handle , but your love for that baby will get you through the junk you don't know!!! I promise you that!!! Plus there are hotlines and plenty of good nurses out there you can contact, try La Leche League as well... they are full of good info!!! Good luck to you, you'll do just fine!!!! Hugs...

Answer 10

Have you ever wondered about the reason of our existence? Have you ever wondered why we die, and where we go after death? What will happen to us in the end? Have you ever asked yourself why God made the earth and all that is in it under man’s dominion? Why were the night and the day, and the sun and the moon created? What are we supposed to do during our lifetime? Were we created just to eat, drink, and enjoy ourselves before we die? As one poet put it:
“I do not know whence I have come.
I saw my feet walking on the road.
As they please I go and stop.
What am I doing here?
How did the road find me?
I do not know! I do not know! I do not know! ”

God has emphasized in many verses of the Qur’an that He did not create us without purpose. He said: “What! Do you think that I created you simply in jest? And that you would not be returned to Me?” (23:115) He also said: “What! Does man think that he will be left to roam at his will?” (75:36) In addition, He said: “Do people think that they will be left to say: “We believe,” and they will not be held accountable?” (29:2)
Indeed, God Has created human beings for a purpose and with a purpose: TO WORSHIP HIM ALONE (Monotheism). He said: “I have not created the Jinn and humankind except only to worship Me. I don't require provision or feeding from them. Surely Allah is the All-provider, the Possessor of all strength, the Firm.” (51:56-58) In fact, all prophets told their people to worship God alone (Monotheism) and shun worshipping His creation (Paganism). God said: “I assuredly sent among every people a messenger with the command: Worship Allah and avoid worshipping false gods.” (16:36)
Prophet Abraham, for example, believed in One God, who had no partner. Anyone who holds a different understanding of God than this has contradicted the religion of Abraham and follows falsehood. God says in the Qur’an: “Those who reject the religion of Abraham make fools of themselves.” (2:130)
Prophet Jesus was reported in the Gospels to have said: “It is written: ‘Worship the Lord your God and serve Him only’.” (Luke 4:8)
Prophet Jacob also said (in the Qur'an) to his people: “Indeed, those which you worship besides Allah are only names that you and your forefathers have established, for which Allah has sent down no authority. The command belongs only to Allah. He has commanded that you worship none but Him. That is the right religion, but most people do not understand.” (12:40)
Read more about the TRUE BELIEVE which supported by the Miracle Holy Quran :
http://www.islam-guide.com/islam-guide.pdf

http://www.harunyahya.com

=*=*=*=*=*=*=*==*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*
=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=

Real happiness and peace can be ONLY found in submitting to the commands of the Creator and the Sustainer of this world. God has said in the Qur’an: (Truly, in remembering God do hearts find rest.)
(Qur’an, 13:28)

On the other hand, the one who turns away from the Qur’an will have a life of hardship in this world. God has said:
(But whoever turns away from the Qur’an, he will have a hard life, and We will raise him up blind on the Day of Judgment.) (Qur’an, 20:124)
This may explain why some people commit suicide while they enjoy the material comfort money can buy. For example, look at Cat Stevens (now Yusuf Islam), formerly a famous pop singer who used to earn sometimes more than $150,000 a night. After he converted to Islam, he found true happiness and peace, which he had not found in material success.
To read the stories of people who have converted to Islam, please visit

http://www.islam-guide.com/stories

At this web page, you can read the thoughts and feelings of these people, who are from different countries and have different backgrounds and levels of education.
=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*