...I somtimes seek 'parental' affection from my friend's parents, but I'm not satisfied, as they are not my parents and won't love me the way my mom & dad loved me till I was 11 years old. But I still crave for parental love, my hubby is a child himself & though he tries to give me the affection, I'm still thirsty! My friends tell me that once I have my own kid I would not feel the pain of losing my parents. Is that correct? If not, what should I do to fill that vaccum? OR how should I get over it? I pray to GOD for love, & it gives me some strength specially when I feel lonely...What do you think I should do?
2006-06-15 12:02:03 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Arts & Humanities ➔ Philosophy
Love is something that we can never do without.... and parental love is so selfless..... it is one of the worst tragedies to be separated from ones parents at such a young age.... I feel sad for you, Dear
I read the other answers and some people have given such wonderful suggestions
This vacuum, this void, this empty feeling, this terrible yearning, this unquenchable thirst, this deep hunger for 'love' that we feel.... it is God's gift to some special souls
We cannot deny that God is All Powerful.... we cannot deny that nothing happens in this world, this Universe, without His WILL.... we cannot deny that He gives us parents so that we get the taste of that Love which is so selfless, so pure, so protective...... Then can we deny that your parents have been taken away from you with God's consent?..... If God took away from you your parents..... then WHY?.... Is God cruel?.... this fact is not acceptable..... Then perhaps, we can conclude that God has plans for you, which at present we cannot understand
Perhaps, HE took away your parents so that your Heart will be filled with this VOID, this VACUUM..... and you will then take every ACTION possible to try and fill this Void.... God wants you to go and search for your Love.... to come out of yourself and seek that Love... God wants you to understand the importance of Love
And those who need Love so badly are the ones who are ever so quick to Love others..... such people, like you, can be quite unselfish.... their priorities are different.... human relationships are more beautiful to them than material things..... and all this training, this moulding, this shaping of what you are today is the result of God's taking away your parents from you
If God has shaped you into a person who you have really become, then perhaps it is His message to you to understand the true meaning of Love
Love is not a 'noun'.... Love is a 'verb' .... it is an action ..... Love is what you get when you give..... so give freely of your Love to all you come ac cross..... it hardly matters whether Love is returned to you or not.... people can love you only the amount they are capable of, for every person's capacity to love is different
Finally, when we turn to God, the SOURCE of LOVE.... we never feel that vacuum or void again.... the heart fills to the Brim
2006-06-16 02:46:28 · answer #1 · answered by nimmoo 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Having a child wont replace the feeling of losing your parents... NOthing will.. They are the ones that were always there for you no matter what- they were YOUR parents... no one can replace them...
Sometimes talking to someone you don't know ( believe it or not ) helps more than talking to close friends parents... Someone that can't fill the void - but is the next best thing are family members. Aunts, uncle, grandparents, older cousins, etc... I have a HUGE family and I know if anything were to happen to one or both of my parents- they would be there for me... Even if you arenot close with them now or you haven't even talked to them in a while... give it a shot- you will be surprised at how they respond
And very good answer fruitnroo.... very good
2006-06-15 19:08:20 · answer #2 · answered by Pixie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One simple thought. The pain you feel is always proportional to the joy you once had. The reason you feel this loss so intensely, is because you were lucky to have loving parents that you adored. Don't see it as a vaccuum, but as evidence of something you were lucky to experience, which is not an emptiness but a fullness. Cherish the memories. It's not wrong to have children in order to find a focus for our craving for love (which is both giving and receiving). Isn't that why everyone has them? Find something you're good at, and make the most of your life. You deserve it.
2006-06-16 08:42:01 · answer #3 · answered by Shona L 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are a child with out parents (so to speak) then find parents with out children. There can be a special bond with "sorogates."
Instead of having your own child to fill the vacuum tey fostering children who have lost their parents and fill a void in their lives. Plus this is not quite so "long term".
2006-06-15 19:10:15 · answer #4 · answered by Cody 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am also like you. I lost one of my parents so early. Then my mom. I became sooo loving that i don't want to lose any friend. Even those that hurts or do harm. God is the only one who will never leave us because even if I would want to stand as a mom for you, i can never give time and everything as you want to. If it is your mom you will be her first priority. There are plenty of you that i care and love, so very little of my time can be yours. Think that I want to do all that you want a mom can do but I just cannot do it. My capacity to do it is limited. Imagine and give thanks to God who is always there for you.
2006-06-15 19:13:51 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This might sound odd-
But try volunteering at a nursing home, there are many older adults there whose children do not visit, and just as you are looking to attain some parental affection, they are looking to vent it. It would be good for both of you and would probably lead to a long-term friendship.
2006-06-15 19:05:36 · answer #6 · answered by fruitnroo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It takes time to accept the painful things that happens to us. I believe that we cannot really replace what only our parents can fill. What we need is accept the fact that we can't really replace that void.
Hard answer basically is accept. There's peace in understanding God's in control.
peace
2006-06-15 19:17:52 · answer #7 · answered by Jivan S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is a sadding one your story...But don't forget time heals everything you willget over it sooner or later.In the meantime I suggest you to pray for God which you say you are already doin..So keep on that my friend and remember that by this you will let them be more happy and peaceful in where they are now which is Heaven...take care!
2006-06-15 19:09:22 · answer #8 · answered by O.D. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
having a child is one solution to quench your thirst for parental love. when you have a child you will then show him/her the love you thirst for. and then you will feel satisfied.
2006-06-15 19:06:00 · answer #9 · answered by Joi 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
4 get what yours friends say and go where yo heart tells you and listen to your mind and do as you plz
I SORRY TO HEAR THAT
2006-06-15 19:08:48 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋