I recently moved out from living with my husband who is emotionally&few times physical abusive back to hometown with 2 kids. I have been living in a retirement neighborhood for yrs and finally decided I couldn't take the isolation anymore.My husband said we would keep joint accounts and try to rebuild our marriage.Then after talking with his parents suddenly wants to block me from all the money except child support and wants to take my name off the house. He still says we can work things out if I ever decide I want to because he isn't the one wanting a divorce but now is pressuring me to make it legal worried I will spend HIS money. The only regret I have is not realizing I should of left sooner.Me and the kids are doing great on our own but he thinks we won't be able to survive without him. Not really a question. Just wanted anyone that is suffering any kind of abuse in a relationship to know you will be so glad and relieved when you finallly have the strength to leave and your free
2006-06-15 09:43:01 · 8 answers · asked by JustWant2B 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I am so proud of you gal!! And even more glad that you decided to post your experience here for other woman to see that its doable.. a lot of woman just think its impossible, its hard but not impossible!! I am happy for you and your kids, you do not need a man like that in your life! I bet you will find better just give it some time as for him thinking that you will not make it on your own prove him wrong!!
Wish you and your kids all the best!
2006-06-15 09:51:48 · answer #1 · answered by Pari 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You will be able to survive without him trust me. Take it one day at a time and breathe. Call legal aide or a lawyer and tell them what is going on and what you should do to get out of this marriage. Try for a divorce and if he contests get a legal separation. Stay away from him and do not go back. My wife has been through something like this in her first marriage She had a really bad marriage with her first husband and he was mentally and emotionally abusive to her. She kept leaving and running because he did not want counseling or help and placed all the blame on her for everything... Sad to say her husband commited suicide and did not want to change anything. She has been through alof of this just like you have. She felt bad for a while after he did that because she was blamed for alot of it but she is now healed and much better for it and is happily married to me.
2006-06-15 09:58:22 · answer #2 · answered by Fast Steve 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The relief of finally breaking out of the "prison" can out way the fear of being alone.... It's a huge step, but once taken you wont look back...... Think about the future now, and take your strength from the kids.... Make it legal if you want to, in fact yes DO IT, because you will at least know exactly where you are and he will have no more power over you.... Remember what I've told you about the house, Half the Equity is legaly yours.... Take it.
Good luck, you know I'm wishing you the best...
M
2006-06-15 11:31:20 · answer #3 · answered by engineer 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leaving an abusive relationship is very freeing. Do not take your name of the house. If you have to sell and split the equaty, it is better. Gives you some cash. If he wants the house, he should pay you for half of the equaty
Kids are very smart knowing about abuse, and tend to go that way later when they grow up. You do not do them any favours by staying. GOOD FOR YOU FOR GETTING A LIFE!
2006-06-15 10:07:39 · answer #4 · answered by oddbutterfly1 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hope you continue to find happiness within yourself. You should be applauded for your strength. Also, a good divorce lawyer could use the fact that he tried to block the funds as proof of his knowledge that you and the children were used to a certain lifestyle. It could get you more alimony. Not to be spiteful, of course. You could always save it or donate it anyway.
2006-06-15 09:50:35 · answer #5 · answered by ny c 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I divorced my ex-husband and now me and my baby are safe and happy. Yes! The empowerment that I feel by being able to stand on my own feet and not depend of that man is a feeling that I cannot describ. I'm independent, happy and proud of myself. I showed that man that I didn't depend on him and I proved him wrong that I couldn;t make it on my own.
Power to you!
2006-06-15 09:48:40 · answer #6 · answered by Blunt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you did the right thing.get a divorce and make sure he pays child support through the courts. i'm divorced and raised my daughter alone.she's twenty now and starting college in the fall. stay strong and focus on your children. good luck!
2006-06-15 09:58:35 · answer #7 · answered by deedy5161 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let him take HIS name off the house and sell it. I did.
2006-06-15 09:48:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋