am i making the rihgt desion?

Question

i going to leave my man he is a control freak and an instigater ha makes up mens names and asks who they are sense day one he thought i was seeing someone other than him every no name or privatecaller private or out of area he starts a fight w me is the saying true the accuser the guilty party we have had physicly abuseuve inseidenseshes a he tries to say if i leave im ******* our sons life up he down plays the reson im leaving too he says that i leaving just cause hes tired and has too go to work or cause some little bs thats not true hes a mysreable jerk even if were out camping or some where "TRING"to have a good time he finds something to gripe about is his mental hange ups my fault or my problem or do you think its cool for me to leave hem like this or should i stay and help him he is27 yrs im24 yrs i have 2 kids to rase should i rase him 2 to be a mature adult i dont have the patiens to i care for him bbut he has abused my fillens anough i
just need a out siders view

Answer 1

My opinion, you know what you should do. You should leave running and never look back. Your kids have to come first and if he's pointing fingers about cheating, he may have a guilty consience and is pointing fingers maybe he's cheated on you and would feel better if he thinks you have too.
If you stay and your children see wants happening, which I'm sure they are, how do you think they will grow up?!? Violence begets violence.

Answer 2

Run! Run straight to a divorce lawyer. His mental hangups are his problem, not yours, and certainly not the kids. You should NOT stay just because he's laying a guilt trip on you. You are doing your kids more harm by staying than you ever could by leaving. If you are smart you will get OUT now. He will only get more abusive as time goes on, NOT less. And You don't need that for the rest of your life. It sounds like you would be doing your kids a huge favor by getting him out of their every-day lives as well. Otherwise, they will grow up thinking it's right to treat women the way he is treating you.

Answer 3

Sounds like the leaving is way overdue. Only you can make the right decisions for your children. I've found through experience that those who accuse are usually guilty themselves. He seems very insecure and untrusting. Your a mother and a woman who doesn't have to put up with that. Good luck

Answer 4

Honey, get out of that house NOW! I stayed married to a control freak for 14 years 'for the sake of the children', but i was miserable. No woman should have to put up with being treated like that. I know it's scary to give up security and go out on your own, but you CAN do it. There are organizations and people who will help you. God bless, and good luck to you and your sons. You deserve better.

Answer 5

I work with domestic abuse and have written research papers on the subject. So here goes...such a bloke is controlling in all sorts of ways. Violence, physical and emotional. Sexual, money and you name it. The impact on you is it makes you powerless. Which is waht he wants because with low self esteem you have no confidence, sufficient to leave him.

Remember most murders are men on their partners.

Seek advice and support. Always have an escape plan in place..........money hidden away, clothes..................

You could ask him to seek counselling BUT


Get out if you can for you and your childrens sake. AND only go back if he has got help anf you feel safe. Men can change and then again!

good luck

Answer 6

well dont leave him yet talk to him that you love him (if you do) and if you have two kids have the kids like in a day care for right now . also have like a therapy talk to him or just you about why he thinks theses things also if he is a control freak tell him that he has to calm down and acted normal or tell him that you cant take it anymore that you will leave him and just leave him like for 2 or1 month so he can get a hold of himself and you try to have some patients for him

Answer 7

you are doing the right thing girl...dont EVER stay with a man who is MENTALLY, PHYSICALLY, OR EMOTIONALLY ABUSING you. YOU are worth more than what that BASTARD is doing to you..and DONT believe for one second that you can't survive and raise your two sons on your own because "IF THERE IS A WILL THERE IS A WAY"......u need to get away from him so you can raise your two sons to have RESPECT for women. Honey, don't think about it for too long JUST DO IT....im afraid for you..my father was like that and it was like living in HELL...PLEASE DONT PUT YOUR CHIILDREN THROUGH THIS OR YOURSELF...

GET OUT OF THIS SITUATION NOW!! BEFORE ITS TOO LATE!!!

Answer 8

You should leave and take your kids with you. This type of environment is neither good for you or the children. If you leave alone he might take out you leaving on the children so please get out of this relationship. This person has little confidence in himself that is why he is controling and the problem is only going to get worse to where either you are seriously injured or your children are. GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN.

Answer 9

no you are not making the wrong decision at all the longer you sit and take it the worse it is going to get! If you have kids the best things for you and them is to get out you and your kids deserve much better than that! Hes teaching your kids that its ok to be controling and its ok to hit women! I dont think you are making the wrong decision at all! In fact I think you are making a fantastic decision! Good luck, and god bless!

Answer 10

This guy sounds like a real jerk. Get out now!