why chrestian men look for love in other places rather than own house?

Question

i see a high percent of men walk on wivess, also treat women rough after one drink ?

Answer 1

I read the other answers and found they really did not address your question. Listen, it is not a good habit to judge an entire population, in this case christian men, by the behavior of a few. Just like people should not judge all muslums by the actions of a few extreamists, we need not do so with any other groups as well.

Some christian men walk out on their wifes and can be abusive after drinking. However, this is by far the minority not the majority. There are many faithful husbands who treat their wives with honor and respect and have deep commitment and love for them.

Those who do walk out on their wives do so for many different reasons. I will admitt it is too easy to obtain a divorce in the U. S. of A. I would prefer to see a requirment of counseling and not just automatically grant a divorce for any grounds. We need to stay true to our vows and work out problems together. In the case of abuse then yes I believe a divorce may be needed. Men and women both have a tendency to rush into marriage as they know it is easy to get a divorce if they so choose at a later date. If people knew it was difficult to abtain a divorce I believe many would take much more time in getting to know each other and see if they are really compatable. The two highest reasons for divorce in this country is differing views on money matters, and parenting styles. All which is needed is two individuals to sit down and discuss how they feel about these issues and others before they marry. Having these discussions AFTER marriage is rather fruitless. Many have deep seated ideas on how things should be and are highly resistant to change these views. It is important for individuals entering a relationship to have an ability to make comprimises and have a desire to meet the emotional needs of partners. When immature individuals marry, they lack needed skills and this creates an atmostphere of selfishness. Selfishness does not have a place within a marriage. The marriage itself is an intity. If something affects one person it affects the marriage intity, which in turn affects the other member. Saying 'he is jealous and that is his problems which he needs to get over", and refusing to work with the one with jealousy, continuing to behave in ways which aggravates this problem directly and severely negitively affects the marriage intity. If one has a problem, it is the problem of the marriage and therfor both parties are equally responsible for finding a method of working it out in healthy manners.

Sadly, in the culture of the United States, we are taught at an early age to put ourselves above any others. We are told we have not only a right but a responsibility to make sure we are fullfilled at an individual level. If this attitude is brought into a marriage, there is no room for a true union, a joining of two into one. There are two seperate individuals who think of themselves first and the marriage second. This is desasterous to a marriage. A "union" can not form under this way of thinkinig. It leads to thoughts of what is best for the individual and not what is best for the marriage. This leads to a high degree of disatisfaction and high rates of divorce. When the marriage no longer seems to fill the needs at an individual level, it is much easier to just leave than to stay and work out the troubles in the marriage. When two individuals enter a marriage with the full undertanding it is a union of two and individualality comes second to the union of two, they will have a strong foundation to build a deep and abiding love which will last and sustain the two over a life time of living as a couple. They must understand the marriage comes first, the individual comes second.

When people fail to grasp this fundemental truth, and divorce is made so easily attainable, a high rate of divorce is inevitable. Men walk out on wives, wives walk out on husbands, and the children suffer as well as are brought into the vicious circle of destructive behaviors and patterns which lead to their evential divorces when they are grown. It is important t o teach our children that it is possible to meet individual needs inside a union. It is just most important to place the marriage in the upper most level of importance, placing the needs and health of the relationship first, then working on the individual needs and desires within that framework.

This is a very complicated and convulted situation facing those in the United States. Individuality is pushed at the expense of a union. This upside down philosophy is destructive to relationships. Yet, so many have a set belief that the opposite is true. There is actually a show on tevlevision teaching women how to put themselves before any other including their marriage! how outragous and how destructive. It is easy to meet individual needs, desires, and goals within the framwork of a supportive and loving marriage. it is much harder, much more difficult to do so without this basic structure. People are continually fighting nature and what is basic and true. They are confused and wonder why their relationship failed. If they just stop this selfish mindset of always putting individual needs before the needs of a union, they would be pleasantly surprised how the marriage can provide a framework in which satisfaction on the individuao level is attained so easily. However, it goes against all we are being taught. This teaching that the individual is always first is just plain wrong. Perhaps when you are single it is appropriate, but when you enter a union, it is a "UNION". This means two are in it together and that which affects one affects them both. When you put the union and your partner first and your partner does the same, the relationship becomes healthy, strong, and the ideal framework for true success in life.

Untill people begin looking at this differently, begin working on putting their marriage first, the divorce rate will continue to be very high in this country. People just do not know how to be married. They go into it looking to have their needs met, but not to meet others needs. As I said, this is a complicated issue and is not easily addressed here at this forum. I gave a basic outline of what is going on here, I hope it helps you understand this issue a bit better.

Not all men walk out on their wives or abuse them. Please do not prejudge an entire population on the actions of a few. Thanks for this question it is a really good one.

Answer 2

If a Christian man were to look for love in his own house - it would be incestuous.

Do I detect a trace of uncertainty in yourself? Are you wanting a Christian man - but trying to think of reasons not to.

Some men all over the world drink, and some abuse their wives, some are also abused by their wives - this is not a religious issue.

Answer 3

Sometimes, letting go seems like the easiest thing to do. But think about this: you've invested so much of your time and energy into another person; you've made a solemn promise; and you still know there's love, even if it's hiding underneath the surface. This website will show you how to save a marriage and avoid divorce, even if you're the only one trying https://tr.im/yxS7o

Answer 4

There are good, bad and indifferent people around the world. Some would say that Muslim men are appalling to their wives, and they don't (or shouldn't) drink. So, while Christians are bad, so too are most other religions in many different ways. So, please remember this when you try to pick on one religion. Remember that your own religion is probably just as bad in some other way.

Answer 5

Not all christian men drink thats a generalization and mes around on wives

Answer 6

These christians are all trying to make sure that when judgement day comes, they can tell the Lord that they have lived their lives correctly as it was written in the bible.

Answer 7

Well, if they live at home with their Mums I think it's best they look elsewhere ...

Answer 8

compared to the abuse other religons force on woman christian woman have it fairly easy.

Answer 9

the question does not make sense

Answer 10

wow--------------- That kind of says it all really!
So long I couldn't read it all due to cranial meltdown.

Whatever she said.