The reason for this question is that once upon a time, so many years ago whe I was 15, I fell in love with a handsome young boy of similar age. We were both like brother and sister and our families were friends. We couldn't date because each one had another but we still had eyes for each other. Now that we're in our thirties after not seen each other for 15 years +, we want to start dating. We still love each other and we trust each other very much. Should we go for it or should we not? Are we taking the right route or is it infatuation I don't think it is for after all these years, our feelings would have gone down the drain.
I would like some help before I make a decision about our future. What do you think? Help!!!
2006-06-14 16:43:01 · 22 answers · asked by Yawotei-Ready to jump and help! 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I married my childhood sweetheart, ended in tears.
2006-06-14 16:47:00 · answer #1 · answered by Beware the fury of a patient man 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound, to me, like an incurable romantic, and there is a real danger of you being in love with the 'idea' more than the person.
Assuming that your life has gone a bit pear-shaped and you've been let down by those who shouldn't have, you're just about ripe to be swept off your feet by that wonderful secure person of your childhood dreams. There seems to be the added sauce of forbidden fruit thrown in for good measure, but I think this may be masking the true flavour of the relationship. You make no mention of all the baggage (emotional and physical) that you both will have accumulated in the last 15+ years and this has got to be factored in.
That said, if it's just dating, then provided you both have nothing to lose, why not? Just be realistic in your expectations, and promise yourself that if the worst happens, you'll still be friends
Good luck x
2006-06-14 17:31:12 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You ought to sort out a key issue. Are you sure this is not a mere infatuation? Certainly after such a long time of wrong child love. you ought to have repented and live a new and better faithful life than recalling that sinning moment and yearning to relive that.
Rather think of seeking forgiveness and living a new life in God and if you meet renewed you may reconsider marriage and not sinning again.
Lastly, you ought to realise that he cannot remain the young boy you used to know. Hes gone thru so many kind of experiences and may either be wild now or cooler.
2006-06-27 03:17:52 · answer #3 · answered by mikail 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One size never fits all. . . it all depends on the people and the situation. Things could work out wonderfully for you or they could end up awful. The only way to really know is to give things a shot. Relationships are so complicated that you can't really pull out a Magic 8 Ball on them. But, it sounds like (at one time) you knew each other well, enjoyed each other, and there wasn't an infatuation. My opinion is that having your best friend and your spouse the same person can only be great!
2006-06-14 16:50:47 · answer #4 · answered by karinlovespooh 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Both of you have a shared history, which has pleasant memories. You apparently love each other and trust each other and both of you want to start dating. These are all good things.
Take the chance. Get to know each other again, this time as mature adults. You may find that the two of you are compatible. If you aren't, well, at least both of you have explored the possibility, and it can be put to rest once and for all. Good luck.
2006-06-25 13:31:18 · answer #5 · answered by Sun is Shining ❂ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are both now mature adults, and your feelings for each other remain good. The only way you'll discover if you were meant to be together is by being together! Don't be afraid to try a partnership & start dating - you'll never know what might have been. And if it doesn't work out, then at least you will have tried & will know for sure. So, stop wasting time (you've already lost 15years!) & get together!! Good luck, good love and Blessed be to you both.
2006-06-22 07:04:33 · answer #6 · answered by devildriver53 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take the chance, if you dont you will never know!
I met my sweetheart when I was 14, we dated until I was 17 and then split on a misunderstanding, met again after 27years and the feelings were all still there, we have been living together for 2 years and despite all the grief we have battled with our families we are more inlove than ever
2006-06-21 05:08:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My mum always said to me that if you're going to be in a relationship, be friends with that person first. It gives you a strong foundation for things to grow upon. You have years of history together. If you know this man and trust him with your feelings and your heart then take a chance. If your friendship is strong and genuine you can always have that together if things don't go the way you want them to.
We're living in quite a pessimistic world these days, it doesn't hurt to have a little hope for yourself and what could be... That's what keeps us going is it not?
Best of Luck to you both... I hope it works out for you.
2006-06-14 22:34:58 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know why you would not go for it unless one of you is already married or something. I have been happily married for 13 years to my husband who was (and still is) the best friend of one of my brothers. We were in pretty much the same situation as you when we were teenagers and fate brought us back together when we were in our 30's...neither of us knows of another couple who is happier together than we are. We are best friends and love each other so much it is unreal. Do it.
2006-06-21 21:31:44 · answer #9 · answered by Vivreici 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think i can work out, you need to invest a lot of time in each other, excitements and expectations have gone, you both now what you like and you are thinking about what else is out there.. afraid of missing out on more...
2006-06-27 10:10:19 · answer #10 · answered by lonely as a cloud 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi,you were both only 15 back then,you have both experienced the outside world if you both feel the time is right then go for it.good luck and hope all goes well whatever you decide.
2006-06-27 22:59:08 · answer #11 · answered by staffy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋