We had a baby boy 18 months ago. Since then our love life went down the drain. I've tried many different birth controls and they seem to either make me sick or lose interest in sex. Also I've been diagnosed with a bladder disease since I had my son. Any thoughts on how we can make our sex life better?
2006-06-14 16:15:56 · 14 answers · asked by Abbi 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
We've already talked to a doctor and they basically said this will take time and we are on our own.
2006-06-14 16:18:08 · update #1
By the way, I don't have a bladder infection. I have an incurable bladder disease.
2006-06-14 16:21:23 · update #2
I understand your feelings as i too had a baby 2.5 years ago. I felt the same no interest at all in sex. One night my partner was watching a porn movie and i walked in and sat down and watched it with him. Well... that turned something on inside of me, even i was surprised (always hated porn)! Since then he has even gone to the sex store and bought gifts for me. We explored together and we are in a whole different world. I really enjoy sex and never thought i would again. So just be open minded and try new things, something will happen. I was one of those women that thought i dont need toys or videos to spark my sex life. Well guess what, i do need it. After giving birth your body changes and i think it's hard to enjoy sex. Have fun and good luck!
2006-06-14 16:45:50 · answer #1 · answered by misscanada_y2k 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Great, U talked to a doc & that was the best thing to do. Takes time, good old answer. Bull... The baby is in ur life now & should come first as U guys alrady know. They arent cheap either. Dont have any more!!! Sex was great before the baby, Well now U can try other options. Oral R anual R both, as Reggie Sanders might say. Football fans may remember these famous words. Try other positions. Several books R DVDs offer this. Good luck.
2006-06-14 23:27:39 · answer #2 · answered by chaz l 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i can't answer your question b/c i don't have kids. however, you should know that it is extremely normal for this to happen! i remember reading an article about it once in psychology today magazine. it said that marital happiness and sexual satisfaction were both at their lowest points after the birth of a baby. they are at their highest after the kids leave the house if that is any consolation!!! as of now, i can't imagine how tired you must both be with an 18 month old!!! the only thing i can think of is talk it over w/ your partner and maybe try to plan a time to have a relaxing night together (do you live close to anyone who would volunteer to babysit or take the baby for a night?). I know planning kind of ruins the spontanaity of it, but otherwise I'm guessing the two of you just won't be on the same page (as far as being in the mood).... good luck, dear!
2006-06-14 23:22:43 · answer #3 · answered by t1g8h81 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1st of all congrats on the little guy. second, the fact that you are interested in improving your sex life is important, but don't put too much emphasis on it or you will be too preoccupied to enjoy it fully. find out what fantasies your partner has and explore them, explore your fantasies as well. try taking some time off for just the two of you, even if it is at some cheap motel. don't get too much into the lingerie thing, just love eachother. if your sex drive is slowing find other things to do that you find enjoyable. have him give you a long hot bath. this should stimulate the both of you.
2006-06-14 23:22:20 · answer #4 · answered by missingyoursunshine 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The birth control pill will indeed make you lose interest in sex. Try and get past that! Watch frisky videos togteher? Go out and buy some new lingerie? Candles, music, set the mood!
2006-06-14 23:19:44 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
both parties need to listen to, understand and respect the needs of the other. it's hard to be without the physical part of a relationship, but there are other issues involved. ie; lost sleep, soreness, breastfeeding...
look at it as an adventure, make it good for both, try new things and take it slow.
2006-06-14 23:21:55 · answer #6 · answered by pukcipriavroc8v 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
may want to talk to the your doc first just to make sure its okay...since u have a bladder infection my gf had one and it seemed painful..so ask your doc first
2006-06-14 23:20:24 · answer #7 · answered by orange_crush_05 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The two of you should try exercising together on a regular basis. This may work. Trust me.
2006-06-14 23:17:53 · answer #8 · answered by Simmy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe like get a check up and if he says u have ?????????? and souldent have sex then dont but if he says u can u sould spend time with ur wife/girlfriend and if she feels more comfortable maybe shell let u go to places u never gone before "wink wink"
2006-06-14 23:20:35 · answer #9 · answered by jimmahtimmah 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start slowly again...dun focus on sex. Focus on touch, love, cuddle, kiss..and move on slowly day by day.. in order to get ur interest back.
2006-06-14 23:20:20 · answer #10 · answered by HappYGal 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋