My parents want me to work at 14?

Question

My mom and dad volunteered me for a job at a local chinese restaurant, I don't feel like doing it. I still want to enjoy being a kid as long as I can. I want to hang out with my friends and not always be busy. How do I tell my mom (nicely) I don't want the job?

Answer 1

It is nice that you want to hang out with your friends and not always be busy. I am sure that your parents would like to do that too. It is great always to do what you feel like doing and be a kid for as long as you can. Some people never mature and become responsible. Some people always want to party and play. Do you want to be like Peter Pan?

The fundamental task of parenthood is to train the child to become a responsibile adult. Apparently your mother believes you are mature enough to handle the responsibilities of working. You should be happy that she believes in you so much and you should work hard to make her proud of you.

When you learn to manage your time, you will find that you can work and still spend time for entertainment and socializing. It is to your advantage to become more mature and responsible. Soon you will be wanting to have a car. You could start now to save your money so that you can afford to buy that car on your own. It is great to learn to manage money.

If your parents financial situation were so dire that they needed you to pull your weight financially, you would have a different attitude. You would want to find a job anywhere just to help out. It may seem to you that not having to work is an asset but in reality many people who come from well to do families suffer from the lack of structure that work would give them. Perhaps the most useful lesson you can learn is to manage your time and money. Many people struggle most of their adult life because they never learn to manage either.

Furthermore, you can start now to build work experience so that you will be a more attractive candidate in the competition for jobs after high school graduation. If you begin to save money for a car an college you will build a good foundation for your future.

Working in a Chinese restaurant will likely be difficult. You can benefit greatly by seeing how hard people work to earn a living and you will value your education more. Most of the Chinese people I know who now have master's degrees or Ph.D's spent a lot of time working in a Chinese restaurant when they were students in high school and undergraduates in university.

Another benefit that you may have is learning to cook. It is good to learn to chop vegetables, debone chicken, devein shrimp, etc. Later you can save money by cooking for yourself. You may only be washing dishes or waiting on tables but you can observe the cook and learn first hand some of the basic techniques of cooking.

You may also learn some Chinese vocabulary. If you make friends you could even learn to play the strategy board game that is more difficult than chess. It is called weiqi (pronounced way chee) it means surrounding game. China is a very interesting place to visit. too. It is not so easy to make friends with Asians so you will have to work hard at it. It is best to be silent until you have something of value to say.

Be sure to thank your parents for allowing you to work where you will have so many benefits. Thank your parents because she believes that you are mature enough to handle the responsibility. Start your new job with great enthusiasm because you will reap many rewards.

Answer 2

If that's how you really feel, tell them exactly that. They as adults should understand that a childhood is a terrible thing to waste, and one should enjoy being young while they can.

If you do want to get a job soon, I think that you should choose it. If you find a job that you really enjoy doing, you'll never have to work a day in your life.

And generally...By law, you cannon operate an oven or cooking equipment until you are 16...So, chances are, you'd be cleaning quite a bit at the chinese restaurant.


I went out and found my first job when I was 14, had two jobs when I was 15 for the summer, and am now working a full 20 hour part-time week in a professional sales environment at 17. Starting early did help me greatly, but of course, I do wish that I could have spent more time with my friends and had some more free weekends. But it'll definitely benefit me in the future...

Weigh the pros and cons about working and not-working, then come to your decision.

Answer 3

Well, 14 is pretty young to start working. I guess if it's just for a few hours a week during vacation it might not be too bad to get the experience. But when school starts, you definitely shouldn't be working. Working in a restaurant, at 14, you'll probably be busing tables and that's a nasty, stinky job, dirty sleeves and messy shoes and all. If you are a kid who says you're bored, then working may be a good avenue for you. Have a nice talk with your Mom, don't whine, ask her why she thinks you should be working and see if you can come to some compromise. I think you'll need a work permit and how are you going to get to and from work at what hours, I wonder.

You sure can write well at 14, with complex sentences, caps and punctuation, etc.

Answer 4

I'm pretty sure also that u can't legally work until you're 16 but you should check with your high school. In order to work you have to get a work permit and the form for that you can get from your high school. But just tell your mom and dad how you feel. Tell them that you don't think that you're ready to take on the responsibilities of a job and that you have a lot going on at school (i.e. hwk or something) and that right now you just want to take in the whole high school experience. Then tell them that you promise to reevaluate the idea at 16 or when you're a little older. You never know, you might want that job for a little spending money...hope that helps! the most important thing is to tell them how you feel. I bet they'll understand if you're straightforward... and also say that if they force you then you won't enjoy working and you'll have a first bad experience of the whole working thing and that can't be good for the future!
Good Luck!

Answer 5

You only have a short time left to hang out with your friends. You won't have time for them once you begin your working life, which should be at the age of 18. Then you have from 18 to 65 to work. Now is when you should be a teenager with your friends enjoying life. Your parents probably mean well and want to teach you responsibility, but they're wrong about this. If they don't need the money, don't take the job and speak up for yourself in a respectful but assertive manner. Good Luck and have fun being young. I was busy going to dances and parties and my grades were good. You should too!.....)(

Answer 6

I'm only 25 - so this advice is not coming from some "old timer"

But your Great-Grandmother was probably married by 16. Our maturity is stunted by todays society. There is nothing wrong with working @ 14. You'll want a car some day and honestly the more accustom you get to hard work at a young age the less likely you fail when you are on your own.

I suggest you take the job...just trust me

Answer 7

Ok first of all if you live in the Usa u cant work untill 16 legaly unless its a newspaper job , 2nd issue telling ur mom u dont want to do it is a bit harder to deal with unless ur parents are jerks u should be open and honest telling them your fealings say I think im not redy to hold down a job also if you cant hold it down later in life it looks bad on your application worked 3 days quit that kinda thing if they insit on you having a job try something easy fist volinter for a nursing home or get a paper rought before diving in to something you cant handal

Answer 8

you better do it!
I started working at the age of 13 and because of my experience ( you learn a lot ) I don't get paid anything less than 13.00 per hour now. I've worked for Wells Fargo, a law office (two of them) the Federal Gov etc.
I've had a million jobs because I've moved a lot but I know how to carry myself and I know how to negotiate. Right now I'm college student with a GREAT full time job on the side and I have to say that I've made some good choices in life.
Be independant and start saving.
This is what I will tell my children one day: 50.000 worth of credit is far better than 50.000 in cash (if you use it right)

Answer 9

Tell her that you don't want the job. Tell her that you are to young yet to have a job...at the age you are at....and that you still want to hang out with your friends. You have a right to hang out with your friends at your age. I had my first job as a baby sitter at 14...but i still had fun and took no time away from me. Tell your mom that if you wanna make some money at your age you would rather baby sit for someone who has little kids. At least you will have some money to spend on your self.

Answer 10

Tell her

"Mom, as much as I appreciate the offer, I'd rather not do the job. Before you say I have to, let me explain.
I just don't think that now's the time for a job... like that anyways. I'll do some baby-sitting if that helps. But just not like that big of a job. Don't I need to be 16 anyways"

Or something like that... don't say it all word-for-word... but thats just an example.
lol=)