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i am married , but soon to be seperated...i met this guy who also knows my husband....he knows that i have feelings for him, but says , because of him knowing my husband, he can`t mess with me....he never tells me if he has feelings for me...but every time i see him..he always stares at me...always aks me "wheres your hubby"...we e-mail each other every day ....i just can`t figure him out...............so what is the deal .....

2006-06-14 09:20:56 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

28 answers

Don't wait time trying to figure him out. AND STOP THE EMAILING. Send him ONE LAST EMAIL that reads. ..

"I understand that because you respect your relationship with my husband communicating with me might be difficult. So I think it is best if we stop sending emails to each other during this trying time. You never know what might happen."

AND STOP. If you see him on the street or in other public place just smile, say hi and walk away.

If after the divorce he wants to contact you... he will.

2006-06-14 09:22:28 · answer #1 · answered by Raynanne 5 · 1 0

You have better check with you State and Local Laws. If I was a betting man, you're "Divorce Meter" is running high.
What you do about this is up to you, no one else can answer that.
However, instead of asking what to do. You should be asking "HOW TO DO IT" the "RIGHT;LAWFUL WAY". This way you'll know the State and Local Fire Code before you're "Fantasy" of playing with fire, becomes a reality.

Your actions in the present will have an effect on your power to get what you want in the future, based on "Law".
Especialy if there are kids involved.

I know tall his because I was the "Other Guy" in this "Greek Tragidy".

I knew her husband and continued to be very social to one another. In fact he built our new (Mirrored) bed room set for me.

He knew what he was doing because he looked into the laws first.

He was in the Navy with a Level 5 (Top Secret) Clearance...In other words he was squicky clean. He took a medical discharge and continued to work at NSA (National Security Administration), (The arm of the Government that spys on everyone.
As a private contractor he was making six figures plus his Navy disibilitty check (Another 30K a Yr).

At divorce time, Jane Doe...my "Former" girlfriend with two kids, was awarded $400 per month, and Secondary Custody!

$400 per month? Can you afford to have your kids three nights a week (While you're off the clock) on $100 a week? Get ready to dig into your own pocket for "Day Care" at $400 a week, just so you can get in a few hours at work those three days you have your kids.

DO YOUR RESEARCH FIST! THEN MAKE THE MOVE! BE AN "INFORMED CONSUMER".

Start with a lawyer is you've got the cash!
Otherwise go online and type in www.(Your State).com or do a google or Yahoo search for a more specific part of your states web site for example, when I search "new york state divorce law .gov" I found: www.courts.state.ny.us/litigants/divorce/index.shtml

So try it with your own state. The NY site I sited above offers pre divorce booklets and other valuble info.

Good luck.
Stay Free

PS have you been married 4 or 7 years? These are tough years, where spouses tend to want to have outside affairs.

Or are you a Scorpio in the Zodiac...you know "Your Sign"?
They tend to struggle with this sort of "Playing with Fire" Stuff.

If you're curious about this part, go to Borders or what ever bookstore you like and find the book called "The Book of Birthdays". Look up your exact day of birth...like November 14th 1980. Then read it for insight, you'll be amazed. You can also go to Yahoo.com click on "more" at the far right ubove the search bar and click on Horiscope. If you want to get real out there try "Numerology", you can do yourself, then your Hubby then the Casanova.
See Ya
JN
Digurheartoutwithaspoon@yahoo.com

2006-06-14 18:00:46 · answer #2 · answered by digurheartoutwithaspoon 1 · 0 0

I think he likes you too but he knows he shouldnt cause he knows your husband and is not in his ethics...I know he likes you and hes interested since you both email everyday and he always asks for your "hubby" like checking your status...he is not going to open up,before he knows he can. He is confused. Dont pay much attention to him....let him figure out his feelings on his own...let him think what is he going to do. Dont open yourself up either..he obviously knows you are interested..
play a little hard to get....play with his mind a little,catch his attention..Flirt but dont give everything away....you get the idea.
And always remember something very important. If he doesnt make a move...dont look for ways to justify his actions, it means that he is SIMPLY NOT THAT INTO YOU. capich?

2006-06-14 16:30:28 · answer #3 · answered by mswildsexycool 2 · 0 0

He might like you but has respect for your husband and your marriage. It may be that even after you're divorced, he'll stay away because it's like banging your best friend's ex-girlfriend - it's just not socially acceptable for some reason. Be prepared to just move on with your life & look for romance someplace besides this guy.

2006-06-14 16:24:26 · answer #4 · answered by Brutally Honest 7 · 0 0

Maybe once your divorce is final, you'll find out. The rebound relationships seldom work out. If you have feelings for the guy, why not wait until the dust settles with your hubby.

2006-06-14 16:26:36 · answer #5 · answered by loshea65 4 · 0 0

Does it really matter what his deal is? He is friends with your hubby even if that hubby is soon to be your ex, a relationship would never work and why put him in that position... ?

2006-06-14 16:23:26 · answer #6 · answered by JAngel 3 · 0 0

Maybe he stares because you scare the hell out of him. Maybe he keeps e-mailing because he is afraid you may hurt him or his family. He asks the whereabouts of your husband because he dosn't want him sneaking up and shooting his ***. Even though there really isn't any real information here I do sense alot about yourself you are not writing down.

2006-06-14 16:32:18 · answer #7 · answered by KaptainKahn 2 · 0 0

What it seems like is that hes worried about your husband finding out, its hard for a guy to know someone, and care for the other spouse.I would give him some time.Wait till your fully separated and then he might come around.good luck

2006-06-14 16:23:55 · answer #8 · answered by Male Sicilian Trauma Nurse 6 · 0 0

maybe he realizes that if you were to be unfaithful in your marraige you would surely be unfaithful in a mere relationship. you say you are "about to be seperated" well, technically you are still married, and it might be wise to use your head and not your heart so that you don't have to regret the choices you made while you were still married. some people respect marraige as a lifetime union and find women who stray quite unattractive.

2006-06-14 16:29:03 · answer #9 · answered by southbayoutlaw 1 · 0 0

He is trying to be a good guy. Let him. If you are not even separated yet, you don't even need to be thinking that far into the future! Let the man be your friend. Worth more than a casual fling any day!

2006-06-14 16:24:37 · answer #10 · answered by educated guess 5 · 0 0

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