My friend is turning 20 this year, and she's had crushes, but she never dated or anything. Her crushes didn't know she crushed. She's thinking that eventually she'll marry, but she isn't even dating yet! She's good at school and knows her career goals, but I'm thinking a bit of dating won't hurt. BTW, she's got emotional scars from her family. Suggestions?
2006-06-14 06:58:53 · 19 answers · asked by mommy_mommy_crappypants 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
You have to let her adjust in her own time when I was in high school and middle school I had half a dozen crushes but now where marriage and children seemed normal expectancy I now know that I'm not cut out for those kind of relationships. She will eventually learn about what she really wants especially once she deals with or is away from her family.
2006-06-16 13:43:57 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, let her live her life the way she wants. She is showing she isn't that interested in dating right now, so respect that. She is focusing more on school and achieving career and financial goals instead of dating, which is pretty darn smart and mature. Be a good friend, respect her choices, and she'll eventually start dating.
2006-06-14 14:02:22 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she's got scars/problems/whatever you probably shouldn't push her. Just be her friend and make sure you don't contribute to some "crush" interferring with her school work either. That's more important. If she DOES chose to start seeing someone, she may lose sight of her initial goals (school), so make sure she knows she can balance the two! You sound like a good friend.
2006-06-14 14:03:28 · answer #3 · answered by Charles 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's all up to her, when she's ready it'll all come out in the open, her love and affection for who ever she really has a thing for. She kinda remind me of me, with the exception of the family issues, but Im sure she'll find her love sooner or later, she's still young, let her stay focus with her studies, in time love will happen, dont push her....she'll be just fine
2006-06-14 14:17:46 · answer #4 · answered by SuzzyLou 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is focused on her career, she sounds extremely mature and goal-oriented. Maybe "men" or "boys" are not in her life plan at the moment.
Too often, women are relegated to the position that if they do not have a boyfriend or a "man" in their life, then their life is not fulfilled. That's such an archaic and ignorant want to look at life.
She obviously knows herself, knows what she wants from life, knows that her life does not have room right now for responsibilities that a long-lasting, faithful, true relationship requires.
Leave her alone! Maybe you could take notes from her and get your life on track!
2006-06-14 14:03:58 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is not yet 20..so she still has a lot of time to date. I am sure she will start dating when she is ready. If she hasn't already, she should join clubs or organizations..that way she can meet others naturally. I wouldn't push her..though...just invite her to group activities and stuff..and it will happen. She has scars...and that may take time to heal..on her own time.
2006-06-14 14:04:14 · answer #6 · answered by Mav17 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let her live her life the way she wants it. She may be very shy and not sure how to talk to men or woman. Try taking her to events where there is no need to flirt or try to impress anyone. You don't say what the scars are. If they are from physical abuse she may be afraid of getting to close to people. Don't push her. Very bad things can happen if she is not ready to face the world.
2006-06-14 14:13:46 · answer #7 · answered by pms 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is still young, I would not push for dating until she is ready. She will soon be 21 and the whole world will open up to her. She will transition fine, when ready. I wish I had my head straight at that age.
2006-06-14 14:02:22 · answer #8 · answered by nateb48 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Same situation here. I'm 21. Never really dated. And I still believe that, when I least expect, someone will appear and make my life better...yeah, it's only based on hope and nothing more... tell her to go out and have as much (safe) fun as possible. it will get easier from that point on =)
2006-06-14 14:15:42 · answer #9 · answered by kelitahmadi 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is someone out there for everyone. That is what I believe. When she is ready she'll start dating. Don't push her just be supportive.
2006-06-14 14:01:20 · answer #10 · answered by Mommyme 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋