My ex-husband has threatened suicide 4 times in 3 years. Should he be allowed to take our dauther across country to visiti family for Christmas?
2006-06-14 06:46:47 · 21 answers · asked by Caitlyn's Mommy 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
The times that he threatened were all in May (the month his mother died of suicide 24 years ago). Mostly of the times were when we were having trouble in our relationship. This past time was becasue he couldn't get into a new one. He currently watches our daughter Wednesday and Friday all day while I work 9-5. He has not given me any child support. He quit his last job about a month ago and starts a new one tomorrow. His evening visitations are for about an hour and a half in the evenings on the days he does not watch her all day and 90% of the time he cancels those. My aunt (My lawyer) said that he should see a councelor (and have it in writing that he went) before he can take her. He SAID he went yesterday and is going ot be going again.
2006-06-14 07:53:42 · update #1
Your child is the first priory. If you truly feel like he could be suicidal while your child then it might not be a good idea to let her go. Somethings to consider are your daughters age. Could she get to safety in an emergency. Is your ex in therapy and when is the last time he has threatened suicide? Many people have problems and you can't punish him for ever. What is his family like, are they responsible? Do you get along with them? If so talk to them and insure that they are going to keep an eye for your child and on you ex. Also think about giving her a track phone with your number programed in so she can call you if she needs to.
2006-06-14 06:56:55 · answer #1 · answered by lee b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When were his attempted suicides? Is he now under a doctor's care? Are you bound by a court ordered visitation agreement?
I believe that since he will be with his family for Christmas, that the trip would be a good thing. His daughter needs to keep in touch with him. She needs to know her father---even all his warts, like depression. You obviously didn't know this man very well before you decided to have a child with him, so why now are you trying to keep her away from him. Leverage, maybe?
You cannot use spite to cover up an inappropriate decision on your part. That is his daughter, too. You are setting yourself up for you daughter's lifelong resentment if you use your anger and hurt feelings to keep her from knowing her father. You will be the one to pay the consequences, ultimately----not him.
2006-06-14 06:50:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If, and only if, he is receiving treatment for his condition. Threatening suicide is typically a cry for attention. Even if he hasn't made actual attempts, he needs treatment. I would be cautious about leaving your daughter with him for regular visits, not just cross-country trips. Speak to your lawyer about your options for requesting that he be evaluated to determine whether or not he stable enough to care for her in an unsupervised setting.
2006-06-14 07:01:38 · answer #3 · answered by browneyedgirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, he wont do anything stupid while she is with him - do you think? If he spend X-mas with family - they'll be there to watch out for both him and her. She needs to be a daughter to him, and he must get to feel the responsibility.
What is it that makes him threaten with suicide? Does he get therapy? Maybe you can ask him to go into therapy so he can manage to deal with what he is struggling with.
2006-06-14 06:49:52 · answer #4 · answered by Tones 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should seriously consider taking legal action. Because I don't what your visitation situation is right now, but if he has a piece of paper saying he can take his daughter where ever, then he can, no matter what kind of suicidal tendencies he has.
Please, get off of Yahoo!answers and take legal action now. Maybe you'll get answer by Christmas.
2006-06-14 07:19:58 · answer #5 · answered by shakia27 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hell no... that is your child, if he can't handle his own problems and mentioned anything about suicide then he shouldn't be allowed to take her anywhere. What if something happens to him and she's with him?? That would be the worst thing for her to experience in her whole life...She'd be in therapy forever.
You love your child more than anything, i know you'd never want to put her in a situation like that!
2006-06-14 06:52:57 · answer #6 · answered by harborgirl2006 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i wouldnt trust him if he really wants her to go then maybe have a family member other than the husband to come get her rather than her be under his rule the whole time but a man that is considering suicide is not stable so be careful either way because sadness can become agression. good luck.
2006-06-14 06:50:36 · answer #7 · answered by tn_wolf_5 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say no... unless you think hes just trying to get attention. Then i would still say no. Because if hes out for attention or serious, Its still not a good idea to put an innocent little girl in the hands of an unstable man. Even if he is her father.
2006-06-14 06:51:16 · answer #8 · answered by Sabrina P 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
personally i wouldnt let him. although he may just be saying that to get a reation out of you.maybe you should tell him he need to see a canslor before you'll consider letting him take your baby that far.if he is suisidle he won't care bout hurting her if he has in his mind anything to get back at you in whitch would be taking your child
2006-06-14 06:50:51 · answer #9 · answered by kansasgirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have to be kidding just asking that question. He obviously needs treatment (provided that what you say is true). What exactly are his "reasons" for suicide? Is he trying to make you feel guilty?
2006-06-14 06:51:57 · answer #10 · answered by A - Dogg 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋