tell me a very funny joke that you have ever heard.?

Answer 1

Two blondes walk into a building, don't you figure that one of them would have seen it?

Answer 2

GOT TO LOVE WEST VIRGINIA

A guy from Belington passed away and left his entire
Estate to his beloved widow, but she can't touch it 'til she's 14.
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How do you know when you're staying in a Webster Springs hotel?
When you call the front desk and say, "I gotta leak in my
Sink," and the clerk replies, "Go ahead."
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How can you tell if a West Virginia redneck is married?
There's dried tobacco juice on both sides of his
Pickup truck.
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Did you hear that they have raised the minimum drinking
Age in West Virginia to 32?
It seems they want to keep alcohol out of the high schools .
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What do they call reruns of "Hee Haw" in Logan County?
Documentaries.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~ ~~~~~

A West Virginia State trooper pulls over a pickup on I-77
And says to the driver, "Got any I.D.?"
And the driver replies "Bout wut?"
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Did you hear about the $3 million West Virginia State Lottery?
(Come on- this is funny!)
The winner gets $3.00 a year for a million years.
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The governor's mansion in West Virginia burned down!
Yep. Pert' near took out the whole trailer park. The
Library was a total loss too. Both books-POOF! Up in flames and
He hadn't even finished coloring one of them.
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A new law was recently passed in West Virginia. When a couple
Gets divorced, they are STILL cousins.
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A guy walks into a bar in Marlinton and orders a mudslide.
The bartender looks at the man and says, "You ain't from
'round here are ya?
"No," replies the man, "I'm from Arkansas".
The bartender looks at him and says, "Well, what do ya do in Arkansas?"
"I'm a taxidermist," said the man.
The bartender, looking very bewildered now, asks, "What
In the world is a tax-e-derm-ist?
"The man says,"I mount animals".
The bartender stands back and hollers to the whole bar...
"It's okay boys, he's one of us!"

Texas Priest

Father O'Malley rose from his bed. It was a fine spring day in his new
Texas mission parish. He walked to the window of his bedroom to
get a deep breath of the beautiful day outside.

He then noticed there was a jackass lying dead in the middle of
his front lawn.

He promptly called the local police station.

The conversation went like this:

"Good morning. This is Sergeant Jones. How might I help you?"

"And the best of the day te yerself. This is Father O'Malley at
St. Brigid's. There's a jackass lying dead in me front lawn. Would
ye be so kind as to send a couple o' yer lads to take care of the
matter?"

Sergeant Jones, considering himself to be quite a wit, replied
with a smirk, "Well now father, it was
always my impression that you people took care of last rites!"

There was dead silence on the line for a long moment.

Father O'Malley then replied: "Aye, tis certainly true, but we
are also obliged to notify the next of kin."

Answer 3

A women went to her gynocologist's, when she layed back the doc noticed two tattoos. He asked why she had a tattoo of a turkey on the inside of one thigh and a tattoo of a christmas tree on the inside of the other thigh. She replied, "Everyone knows the best eating is between Thanksgiving and Christmas!" Best wishes

Answer 4

One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and
>decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to
>take the boat out.
>
>She motors out a short distance, anchors, and reads her book.
>
>Along comes a Game Warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman
>and says, "Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?"
>
>"Reading a book," she replies, (thinking, "Isn't that obvious?")
>
>"You're in a Restricted Fishing Area," he informs her.
>
>"I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading."
>
>"Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at
>any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up."
>
>"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault," says the
>woman.
>
>"But I haven't even touched you," says the game warden.
>
>"That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could
>start at any moment."
>
>"Have a nice day ma'am," he said and he left.
>
>MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads. It's likely she can also
>think.

Answer 5

Two muffins are sitting in an oven when on muffin looks over to the other and says "Boy it sure is hot in here" and the other looks back and says "Holy Sh!t a talking muffin"

Answer 6

this is really funny
a girl asked to man : why do u keep shaving ur beard off, is it because u wanna look like women??

and the man goes : nooooo that is not the goal of shaving

and the girl couldnt stop laughing
hehehe

Answer 7

My favorite joke is:

What do you call an insomniac dyslexic atheist?

Someone who lies awake all night wondering if there really is a dog.

Answer 8

What do sex and air have in common? Neither one is a big deal until you aren't getting any.

Answer 9

ask someone if there was a fire would u pull that rope up there, c how many people look up.

mtv should have a pimp my face just for u

Answer 10

your mamma's so ugly, that when she looked out the window, she got arrested for disturbing the peace!