Problems in your marriage - answer if yes?

Question

Please don't answer if you are not having problems in your marriage as that is not what this is about. Are you having emotional issues or non-loving issues or thinking of straying or anything similar to this and how long have you been married? I want to see how others cope with these issues. Are you unhappy and do you know why? I think maybe someone's answer may help me figure out my owns issues (maybe - maybe not) -- but please if you are not having issues, don't respond to this. I don't want to hear how happily married you are. If you are, that is great but that is not what this question is about, okay?

Can you all help with the details/issues too? I'm trying to reach out a little for some insight.

Answer 1

12 years. Yes I had problems and not too long ago. About a month to be exact. Our first child put me on the couch, crying at night so we put him in our bed and I would go on the couch. Well that turned into about 11 years. I will tell you what; we totally drifted apart from each other. Sex was about once a month, there was no physical contact, no kisses, no talking, I used to work allot of hours just because I thought why go home? I am not going to have sex, I am not going to sit and talk with my wife it was go home take a shower and go to sleep on the couch. It came to the point where I became depressed, I wanted to leave my wife and two children without really knowing why, or where I was going to go. I was on the brink of having an affair so I could get affection from someone, anyone. She had had enough with this situation too. One night she came home and we had incredible sex, then the next morning, then the next night and so on for the rest of the week. She had told me she could not live this way, I couldn’t either, she told me she has not been happy for the past 12 years, I guess I was not either, we started to hug, kiss and hold hands again, we became closer, it was allot of work but It is worth it. Don't stray, it will make your problem even bigger, don't wait for her to make the first move like I did, it could take to long or never happen and it could eventually destroy your marriage. Take charge, ask her how she feels about your relationship, talk to her, go up and give her a hug and a kiss for no reason at all, you my find she wants and needs the same thing you do.

Answer 2

More than you know... We have been married for 20 yrs. About 5 yrs ago, I began feeling like I was the only one giving in the marriage and all he was doing was taking. We couldn't communicate and, over time, my hurtful feelings turned into anger and resentment. A friend of ours became more than a friend to me and I fell in love with him and had an affair. That was a year ago. Today, I have a 12 day old baby girl by my lover, who I still love and still want to be with, but I live with my husband and other 4 daughters. My life is really f*cked up and I feel so torn between theses two men. If you are unhappy, don't turn to someone else like I did. It can cause more problems than you'll ever know...

Answer 3

I was married for 13 years and thought I was very happy. I've been divorced for about 6months I thought about straying in the marriage but I keep on trying to stay thinking things would get better. We tried marriage counsling many times I live in counsling for myself trying to fix me and that was not the problem. My exhusband wasn't totally willing to save the marriage because he was cheating on me all the time.

I did everthing I thought of to save the marriage I never strayed because I wanted my marriage to work. If the other party isn't willing then maybe its time to move on. You only tear you sprit down to nothing and find yourself being a basket case and he will go on without you looking at you like what wrong with you.

Try marriage counsling before you make a decision like I did. Give your marriage everthing you got in your heart, but understand it works both ways.

You cannot do it by yourself he has to want to too. If you make the decision to stray it will only add to your problems, keep yourself in check don't do it. I'm aganist cheating if you feel that way then get out of the marriage because if it happens and he finds out he will never trust you again even if you make the decision to stay together.

This is coming from first hand experience I've been through it all being married with 5 kids. I finally made the decision to get divorced and I feel like I've been born again! I feel so much better I can think now,breathe again ect.

Answer 4

Must be homework time. I assume by "right", you mean power. Right and power are often used interchangeably when discussing laws states and the Federal government may put in place. Yes, states do have the right to ban gay marriages. In Massachussetts, the state's highest court overturned the state law banning marriage between same sex partners, saying that to do so required amending the constitution. Marriage is a contractual arrangement established by state law. Each state has the right to set its own standards as to who may marry and under what circumstances. Its been the right of the states, not the Federal government to establish and enforce marriage laws. Having said each state has the right to ban gay marriage, the qualifier is that its best for the state to include the ban in its constitution, denying the ability of courts to determine a statute against gay marriage is unconstitutional by the state's constitution. A number of states now have done that. Except on Federal reservations and within the military, the Federal government has no authority to make laws concerning who may marry whom. Both by common law and interpretation by the courts, marriage is a state delegated area. However, the Federal government can adopt an amendment to the Constitution, with approval of the states, that would ban same sex marriages. The Defense of Marriage Act is limited in scope, only says other states cannot be forced to recognize a marriage in another state, but does not prevent the states from doing so. The other limit, that applied to the Federal Government, as explained in your additional detail, answers your question as to the type of law the Congress can adopt. It doesn't prohibit same sex marriage, just denies recognition by Fed agencies. With your additional details, it looks as though you have answered your own question.

Answer 5

,I'm not married but am in a long term relationship. problems is not the half of it. one day I'm gold next day I'm garbage come on naked ER chicks on his CPU give me a god damn break magazines, walking through stores drooling over eye candy, oh yeah baby if feel so pretty. and he wonders why i have low self esteem. don't get me wrong I'm actually pretty hot for my age but i cant compare to a 16 year old virgin. tonight after work he will be going to the girls gone wild thing that's in town yeah i feel sexy again oh boy cant wait to give him some when he gets home. OK my point of view girls give it a ******* break **** *** and co och are nothing new ladies if we want things to change then stop accepting money to show your **** and guys respect your women you are either with them or you are single make up you minds and then live with Honor

Answer 6

I am currently having problems in my marriage as well. My husband is constantly going out and I wonder if he is seeing someone else, but of course he denies it.

Answer 7

yea i am having problems also. i dont know what your problems r but my r that he wont let me get a job he never watches the kids, he doesnt do anything aroung the house to help out, he has never sat down and fed our kids, he has never bathed the kids, he treats me like i am under him not married to him, he acts like all i am supost to do is take care of our kids and clean the house. he wont let me talk to any of my friends, and he never lets me go anywhere( when he does let me leave)with out our kids. so my answer is i want a divorce but i dont know if thats what u want so i hoped i helped u.

Answer 8

My friend is and he is thinking about divorcing his wife, because he is so tired of having to deal with all the problems.

Answer 9

I have many problems in my marriage....Abusive and controlling issues...

Answer 10

been married for almost 16 yrs. & yeah it's difficult sometimes. i came hours before signing the papers...glad we didn't. you have to talk to someone & it depends on the situation as to what you should do.