I have been married for 4 yrs but this is getting boring I have two kids and have a lot to lose.
2006-06-13 17:00:33 · 14 answers · asked by maria l 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If the love is truly gone, get out now.
2006-06-13 17:03:03 · answer #1 · answered by Beware the fury of a patient man 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can't believe some of the answers here already. I believe in marriage for life because that's the way God intended it to be. You are right when you say you have a lot to lose. Your kids have a lot to lose as well. Don't believe the crap that divorce doesn't affect the kids involved. Just because it's more prevalent these days doesn't mean that kids aren't affected when the two most influential people in their lives break up. They are affected deeply.
Communication is the most important element of any marriage. Talk, see a counsellor if you need to (and don't be ashamed of it!) and start the process of getting out what you need to say about your marriage and your spouse. Tell him/her what's going on in your head. Don't quit. Like someone else said, marriage is too easy to get out of these days. Marriage is a commitment for life. When people commit to it and WORK THROUGH the crap, the relationship deepens and gets deeper, more fun and more fulfilling.
Talk it over. Get your feelings out on the table, be vunerable and start getting your marriage back to a healthy state. You'll be glad you did it... and your kids will thank you for years to come.
2006-06-13 17:47:39 · answer #2 · answered by Darren C 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seek counseling and help with this... Why is the love lost? What has happened to get your marriage to this point? You do have alot to lose here for sure. Try spicing things up in the bedroom and doing new things together with your spouse that is fun and new.. Try taking the kids to a sitter and going on dates alone at least once a month..... Set a date on your calander for this regurally..... Basically you need to fall in love all over again. Try role playing too it is soooo much fun lol... Sounds to me like you are just bored and need thigns and ideas to reopen your love for each other and rekindle your love and make your marriage a fresh and exciting one!!!! I wish you the best!
2006-06-13 23:34:46 · answer #3 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The marriage will come to an end eventually, few loveless marriages survive. If they do, it usually does with one or both spouses having an affair. So your choices are, (1) try and do what you can to rekindle those loving feelings, or (2) stay in the marriage until the kids are grown and see someone on the side that you do love in the meantime.
2006-06-13 17:08:09 · answer #4 · answered by Silvo L 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should take a step back and try to remember what it was like when you were in love. What is missing or what needs to be changed for you to be more satisfactory in your current situation? This is truely a very complicated decision for you to make and have many things to consider. I can not hope to give you an answer that will help you determine the course of action to take. I suggest you talk to your husband and try to seek some marriage counceling. Good luck.
2006-06-13 17:09:08 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to relive the love by doing new things that would give excitement to both of you. Now considering you have two young kids, it's unfair to them if this is going down the drains. Seek a marriage caunsellor if you have to.All the best and hope you feel better soon.
2006-06-13 17:10:47 · answer #6 · answered by M.C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
something happened along the way?what used to be happy was sad?what you've been doing lately?you got work or just stick around the house doing the chores?life could be a bore if you got nothing to do.why not have your family go out and have fun.if this sounds too expensive,why not go to any recreational places.that will help you bond with your family.make it,say,once a week? or whenever you feel like going.dont just give up.it's just a trial my friend!life's a game.if you feel like youre losing, YOU LOSE! just give your marriage another chance.if it fails.give it another and another.never lose hope.there's not even a 'third party' involve in here (i hope so)!
2006-06-14 01:17:40 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why is the love lost? You really have to ask yourself if you just love your spouse or are you in love. If the passion isn't there then evaluate why it isn't. Start making plans to do special things w/your spouse such as dinner dates, special time just for the two of you @ home when the kids are sleep. Start acting like a couple again. Try, try, try, until you can't try anymore. You will know when enough is enough. I did.
2006-06-13 17:08:10 · answer #8 · answered by larozz 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marriage has it's good and bad times, that's life. Don't leave until you know you've done everything humanly possible to make this marriage work. Part of the problem today is that it's too easy to get out of a marriage. If you have done everything humanly possible to make it work and you BOTH still want out of it, then I guess you'll have your answer.
2006-06-13 17:09:52 · answer #9 · answered by funfroggy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're no longer in love with your partner, then get out now. Don't waste another minute of your life, because life's too short. Find someone you'll be truly happy with. Your kids will survive a divorce, because kids are more resilient than we give them credit for.
2006-06-13 17:05:32 · answer #10 · answered by smurfette_au2000 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am feeling this way too at the moment, i have been with my hubby for 13 years and we have one son I am gonna try to start again with him like going out a bit more and doing different things, it this doesnt work i am all out of ideas. Good Luck.
2006-06-13 17:05:58 · answer #11 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋