Should I stay or should I go?

Question

I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for two years now but things have just been getting worse with time and we've both talked about parting our ways but just haven't been able to actually do it. Last night my sister - who lives in Japan - asked me to come and live with them. To do so, I'd have to practically start over from scratch - sell my house, my car, everything.. It would be a new start for me and give me time to experience things I may never get another chance to experience. I still love my boyfriend, but I don't know for sure that we still have what it takes to make things work. At this point, I'm just not happy with life in general. Do I go to Japan and make a new life for myself - go back to school and work on me for once? Or do I stay here barely making ends meet and staying in a relationship that may have no future?

Answer 1

Make your plane reservation, pack your bags and get yourself to Japan. You know what you should do deep down. Go with your gut. If you have been with your boyfriend for two years and you still don't know if your relationship will work, you are wasting your time and his. Your own words "I'm just not happy with life in general" says it all. You have an opportunity not many people get and that is an adventure to another Country. If you are meant to be with your boyfriend (which I very very seriously doubt) it will happen if you go to Japan or not. Good luck to you and have fun in Japan.

Answer 2

I am not sure what u r really asking. Going to Japan is probably a trip of a lifetime. but me personally I have made it so far in y life and worked so hard to get whaere I am, I don't think I could give it all up to start over from school level. Think about it! Y don't U take some time away from the relationship and go on a tripp to see ur sister but make Japan just a trip. As for the boyfriend U already know there is no future so let that go an U can start to work on urself here and it won't seem like forever just to try and get a car, a house, and independence. Just think U have been on ur own and knows how it feels but now Ur moving to a place where U have to find ur way around and find the time and another place to even be alone..if U want to. U need ur independence, just take a trip and a vacation from the relationship. Good Luck!

Answer 3

Living with your sister in Japan may not prove to be of help to you in the future because as soon as you think of starting your own family, you will have to make a new start again without staying there. For me, I think you'd better stay where you are right now and hope that things between you and your boyfriend will be better very soon. Going back to school is quite an intelligent move that you will make if you opt for it which you can do without having to end your relationship with your boyfriend.

If you still love him, why not have a heart to heart talk with him once and for all and try to pick up the pieces from there if at all possible. At the end, if you and your boyfriend think that it would be best for both of you to separate ways, make that graceful exit from his life and look forward to better tomorrows without him.

The school is one big place where the great possibility of meeting someone whom you deserve better is great. Don't foroget that sometimes, one has to make a harsh decision is his life which at first seems to be hurting and disadvantageous only to find out later that that was one of the best decisions he has made in his live ever. Search your soul with all honesty and it will tell you what to do. Good luck.

Answer 4

If you read your question carefully you'll see that you answered your own question. You know the relationship isn't working, so, it's time to let it go. Your real question is whether or not you go to Japan (and sell everything you own to do it), OR go back to school but this time do it for yourself. On one hand, you have an adventure of a life time you can jump right into, or go to school and do what YOU want to do learning to take care of yourself. You'll only get one chance to go to Japan, and what stories you will be able to tell !! Life is short...have an adventure, school will always be there. Live YOUR life for YOU for a change.....good luck and have a GREAT life!

Answer 5

You are practically answering your own Question. With just the fact that you are saying if you stay it might be no future for this relationship. So the best thing to do is go with your own instinct and move on. If I was in your situation I would let him go. because of the fact things are not going so well at the moment and futher along you might end up hating him and you really dont want that to happend but, one thing i do tell you if you want to continue your education that would be a good start for a new YOU.....so think about what YOU really want cause only you can make the decision in your LIFE....

vanessa

Answer 6

I say go. You should not stay here just in case it works out with your boyfriend. If you do so, you will kick yourself in 10 years for not taking this opportunity that has opened itself to you. This is the chance of a lifetime and if you really want to work it out with your boyfriend, you need to work on yourself first, then the relationship. Don't make the same mistake so many other women do~putting some man before themselves. Trust me, he puts himself first if he's like most men. Why shouldn't you do the same? Not man bashing, I have a great boyfriend, but I still take care of myself first, then the relationship.

Answer 7

What are you asking this question for? Go to Japan. You will never get another chance like this. Why waste your future. Just the experience of a different culture will revitalize your life. If I were you, I would already be in Japan.

Answer 8

Hmm, you sound like my ex-girlfriend.
People grow apart sometimes, but if you still love him you've got to compromise, or one of you must change for the other. People are changing constantly, if you take a break you will both change apart from each other and never fit back together again. That was the mistake I made. And now the girl I would still married is with someone else.

You've got to decide how you're going to deal with this. You still love him? Then TRY! Talk to him - if he's experienced enough he'll understand what you're saying. If not, he'll lose you, like I lost mine.

Answer 9

Hey!

All I have to say is nothing just happens', God opens up opportunities for us to help move us to the next level. I'm not saying you relationship with your boyfriend isn't worth holding onto, but you said it your self "to experience things I may never get another chance to experience". We have to learn to grow with every chapter of our lives and not stay stuck in what's comfortable. Your possessions will come and go and men are a dime a dozen. Weigh your pros and cons, as elementry as that sounds, but it works. Be honest with yourself, this is your future we're talkin' about.

Answer 10

Girl, my advice is you should go to japan and make a new life for yourself and go back to school and get youself togetter for once.Every once in a life time everyone comes to a point that they have to start over. B/c wen you came in this world u had nothing and once u leave u still aint gone have nothing so just follow what your head got in mind,just don't let it go in the wrong direction.