Okay. So I know this is quite a predicamint. (sp). I wish I could get over it. Whenever I'm around this person at work I try to avoid him/her (not giving out specifics-smile) because of what I'm feeling. I only end up sounding stupid anyway. This has been giving me headaches :-P
2006-06-13 11:55:41 · 12 answers · asked by charlielikespeanutbutter 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Hey,
I have a "thing" for a guy at my work... I'm not quite sure of his sexual orientation. but i know how you're feeling. My suggestion would be to avoid avoiding him... that is don't act like they've let off a stink bomb or anything. Act normal around them, and, as you said it's a crush. It shouldn't last long. You'll move on. I don't think that you should follow through with it, because a lot of people are going to get hurt if you do, including their children. If they are also uncomfortable with your crush, if you tell them, they may put out a sexual harassment thing on you. It's complicated with work based relationships... don't ruin your career and other peoples lives because of a crush. Sorry if it sounds harsh, I just don't want either parties to get hurt...
2006-06-13 21:01:08 · answer #1 · answered by i_am_nathan_2002 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm totally feeling you! Right now I'm going through the exact same thing. His not married, but he does have a girlfriend. I am totally stupid around him. I try to avoid him at times but it only makes it more obvoius. Trust me! I can't even wait to get up in the morning so I can get to work. It sucks. It seems like you respect his commitment to his family, but this still doesn't make things any better right! I mean where does this leave you? I've been advised to keep my personal life away from work. Okay, so I do that and everything else that seems "morally correct ", but it only results in you having endless battles with yourself everyday for the sake of not wanting to inconvenience anybody else. I wish there was a way out of this coz I too can't stand it no more. Some days I just wanna let go and pursue, but then somedays I think it's wrong. I wish I could give you some advice that actually works, but I can't. I'm merely saying that I completely and utterly understand what you're going through. Good luck.
2006-06-13 19:32:51 · answer #2 · answered by overdude 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have had a lot of co-workers that I wanted to really get to know better and maybe date.I even had fantasies about some co-workers...I even did do the nasty with a few of my co-workers.Of course after I did it was kind of hard to go to work knowing I will see someone I did the "business" with.
But I don't think affairs of the heart have boundries.If you find that special someone, even if it is at work, then try it out.Find out if him/her would even be interested in you or if you are his/her type first.If you are embarrased try talking to them as a friend before you get intimate.Being friends first is always the best way to know if there is a chance for more.Otherwise you might be hurt if you get rejected.
But always remember that you are at work and he/she is a co-worker and you have a responsiblity to do your job-not flirt.Ask him/her out for a drink or some coffee or a game of pool as friends after work.Go from there.If things get heated up between you two then you might need to worry about whether you need to change jobs so you're not uncomfortable working with someone you slept with and/or date.
But seeing someone who is married is diffucult.There won't be a future.It might be about sex.But nothing more.Even if he/she leaves his/her spouse for you, think about it.....What will stop them from leaving you for someone else?If they want to sleep with you and you are ok with that then go for it.But still follow the basic rules and remember that you are with someone elses spouse and there are no gurantees that you are ever going to be more then a play thing.
On the other hand, fantasies are fun.Maybe just keep the fantasy and enjoy it as that and nothing more....
Good Luck....
2006-06-13 20:36:09 · answer #3 · answered by BuckFush 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes, this is natural, having a spouse and children doesn't take away the human craving of wanting to be with someone. We as humans can't totally control you we are attracted to. This could lead to ramification that could lead to difficulties at the work place. Take caution, and go slow.
2006-06-13 19:32:53 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
not specifcally, but close enough. i have had a crush on some straight guys with girlfriends from school. I'm in the middle of one right know. which is a pity, because he has some marvelous eyes and a nice healthy a$$.
2006-06-13 19:08:07 · answer #5 · answered by gaygoddevil 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, there is a guy at work who I think is very attractive. He's very quiet and I had hardly spoken to him, but we don't work in the same department. I only see him walking around. I did notice he wears a wedding ring.
He always looks really depressed, like he wants to kill himself. I don't know his name so I call him hot-sad guy.
2006-06-13 20:22:18 · answer #6 · answered by huhwhat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course we all have at one time or another. Keep your mouth shut, go about your business, and look elsewhere for you dates. If you move on this, THEN you will have a real headache.
2006-06-13 20:41:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I have. With a really sexy married man who would flirt back.
I think the crush was so strong because I knew it would never go anywhere.
I have a partner too...
2006-06-13 19:29:03 · answer #8 · answered by Chris C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not fantasize about this person??? Use whatever you can dream up as your falling asleep......eventually it goes away......trust me on this......I do it all the time and the 'crushee' never has a clue!
:)
2006-06-13 20:06:36 · answer #9 · answered by D~~ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
uh, i thought some guy at work was good looking, but i didnt want to jump his bones, if you are a chick and she is too, i say go for it that is always cool
2006-06-13 18:57:55 · answer #10 · answered by thale138 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋