my son is in 5th grade and they want him to repeat the grade,they told me he can do it but he choose not to do

Answer 1

My daughter was facing the same thing. What saved her was one of the tests that is similar to the FCAT. She scored really high on it....she was just being lazy during the school year. I had to have a long, hard, talk with her and she told me that she just didn't feel good about school. Once we got the news about her test scores, she was so happy and vowed not to have another year like this past one.

You might want to talk to your son to see if there are any other factors that are affecting him. Good Luck!

Answer 2

I'm a Navy brat and was born in Italy. When we moved back to the states, my older sister was 6 and didn't speak much English. She was told that although she did pass the first grade, she should repeat it. She did and it was wonderful for her. She ended up excelling in school and graduating with honors. She received several academic scholarships from many different schools. When she graduated college she told me that she honestly believes if she had not repeated the first grade, she would have struggled and probable not ever go to college. When they recommend your child repeat, is for their future that they are looking out. Ask your son to reconsider, he may just be worried about leaving his friends. It will be easier if he makes the choice than if he does fail the sixth grade. I wish him the best of luck.

Answer 3

I have the same problem with my rising 10th grader. Apparently children like this are actually smarter than they care to let on. The work your son chooses not to do is probably so easy to him he doesnt want to waste his time... I am not sure repeating is the answer, only to maybe teach that whether you like it or not, you have to do it.. just like a real job. Now it the time to start trying to gently nudge him in the right direction so when he gets to high school.. you can encourage him to take courses that are a bit higher level than just the basic ones. If you decide to not let him repeat, then take time over the summer to just let him know this is his job as part of the family, and if he doesnt give it his best, then you all feel the pressure from it as well. And as a working parent, if you didn't do what you had to when on the job, you might not have one.... I hope this helps.

Answer 4

He may very well be able to do the work, but for some reason chooses not to complete tasks given to him...another possibility is that he may have an undetermined learning disability that requires accomodations in the classroom. I have a 12 year old that we opted to hold back in the 3rd grade even though she passed (barely). Turns out she needed a little more time to mature, and she has a learning disability as well. She is super smart, but has a problem "processing" things she reads. She is in a "504" program now and entering the 7th grade with all a's and one b from 6th grade. 504 means she qualifies for services like having her math tests read orally, extra time on reading assignments, as well as time to take and re-read notes before classes. She does not qualify for special education services. Maybe you should contact the diagnostician/ counselor for your son's school and request some testing for him. Holding him back now is not the end of the world. If he needed it in High School it would be socially devistating. Fix this problem now.
Good Luck!

Answer 5

Are they tell you they are going to hold him back or are they telling you they recommend for him to stay back. If they are saying he is getting held back then... (Depended on what you think) What is making him not do the work? Are they other issues going on in his life? (stress, divorce, etc.) This could be reasons why he is not doing to work. Is he at the same maturity level of others in his class? Is he able to sit still in class and learn or his he preoccuppied with other things? Is he hyperactive? I know you don't want your child to be held back but it is not always the worst thing. If he repeats 5th grade again this will give him time to consider what happens if you don't work hard. This might motivate him to apply his self more next year. I think it would be better for him to repeat 5th grade instead of going to middle school and then having to repeat a grade. If he repeats this year he will make new friends and be able to take them with him next year. I think we all know how hard it is to start middle school for the first time. It's Scary! I do think that you do need to talk to his doctor about this. He maybe can help you both with the repeating of this grade. The doctor maybe can also help you in ways to motavate him with things that he might not be that interested in. (School for instantes) If the teacher is not telling you that he has to repeat then maybe he can summer school. I do think that it might help if he gets a tuiter. Even if you know how to do the school work sometimes it's easier for a kid to have someone else teach them. Sometimes kids think that you are bossing in them around and they want give making it hard for them to learn.

Answer 6

Research has shown that retention is usually not effective at that age. Academically, if your child did not succeed the first time he will not likely do much better the second. Repeating a grade for emotional immaturity works in Kdg. or first grade but after that there is not much difference. If he chose not to do the work the first time there is little to show he will do it the second time around. Try tutoring or a Sylvan type learning center first.

Answer 7

Perhaps special services could evaluate your son. If he has a learning disability repeating the 5th grade would not help. He may benefit from replacement in a resource room or self contained special education setting.

Answer 8

If the teacher feels your son should repeat he probably should. I work in education and some kids need an extra year for different reasons. If he goes ahead he may soon find himself struggling. Maybe a councilor at school could talk to him and help hjm have a better outlook on this. I can understand why he wants to go on though. You have to decide what's right for him .

Answer 9

well if your son is not up to par on what the requierments are for the 5th grade i do not see know reason why they would not keep him back most of the time though its not a choice for the student to decide anymore its up to the school that the child attends , you may want to see if he can be put in a class thats made of 5th and 6th graders if your school has that option i know some schools now days graduate there 5th graders adn then they move onto a jr high/middle school , you may be able to ask the jr high if thats where he will be going if they offer it , but in any means get the child some extra help , maybe a friend can tutor him , u can ask if he takes the classes he failed in summer school , or you can have him tested without his friends etc around to see if he can pass the test that the teachers want him to pass , but i myself as a parent of 6 kids would not want the school to pass my kids if they werent doing what was requiered , i had this happen , 2 my twins , there jr high had no books for the kids to bring home so they had to copy the work offf the board etc there was know way for me to help them and the school kept passing them , they moved onto highschool , with graduating jr high , and then there 3 yr of high school they were told u dont have enough credits so u need to go to another school , well i have them in a occupational /vocational school , and in one year of being there they caught up to where they should be , even though they wont be graduating this year seeing how they just causght up to there 11 grade year they wont be graduating this year with all there friends there happy that they caught up and plan on going to summer school as well as continuing at the vocational schohol where there at now and most young kids 16 on up would normaly give up , so if i was you as a parent i would not give your son the option on moving on to the next grade or keeping him back , keeping him back wont hurt him one bit and it might help him to let his buddies move on ahead of him , you are the parent and u need to let him know that he is going to stay in 5th grade next year theres nothing wroung with , and next year he should have a lil more of a upper hand on the other 5th graders cause he should basically know how to do the work

Answer 10

Im sure he feels very uncomfortable. Maybe speak to the school principal and find out in which area he is weak in. During the summer you can try to strengthen him in those areas with tutoring or summer school. If the school is adamant about it, try to find out who are going to be his classmates the next year around-in the lower grade- and arrange for play dates with the kids or send him to the same camp. That way he will forge friendships with them without feeling bad about it and he might ending being HAPPY that he is repeating the grade so that he gets to keep his new found friends. Good Luck!