If your boyfriend/husband wants to go out with the guys say, once a month....Is that unreasonable?
I enjoy going out every once in while for a guys night out yet I catch a lot grief from the lady who thinks she wears the pants in the family!
2006-06-13 07:35:21 · 39 answers · asked by jab92593 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I don't think that your asking to have a "guys night out" once a month is anything to get very upset about....if someone starts laying down the law like that then that gives the other person more reason to become unhappy and possibly start doing things that they never would have considered before....I can understand that she may have a jealous streak in her...heck everyone does but your not asking the world here....she should do the same thing...it's healthy to have friends and do things apart once in awhile...otherwise people don't grow in a relationship...sometimes you need that little time away...it certainly doesn't mean that you don't love him/her anymore...your just spending some time with your friends. A lot of marriages get into trouble here because the person feels cornered and confined....not being "allowed" to go anywhere...it's just not a good situation all in all..... she should by now have some degree of trust with you if the two of you have been together for any length of time, at least I would hope so. I think it's also important to bring her around your friends too and likewise with her friends...don't be limited to only one area of your life...no-one has a chance to grow in a situation like that. Sit her down and calmy tell her how you feel....tell her that you love her and would never hurt her but that you need to see your friends once in awhile....maybe on those nights, she can do something with hers? If she's at all reasonable she should be able to come to a compromise with you.
Good Luck!
2006-06-13 07:47:01 · answer #1 · answered by Blue_Girl 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I wouldn't think it's being unreasonable. Sure, it's cool to spend time together; but I think it's healthy that you get the chance to spend "a night out with the boys" as long as it's WITH THE BOYS. I don't think there's a need to wear ankle bracelets because you've got a significant other. By the same token, it probably would help her also if she spent a night out with the girls. However, both must trust each other to do just that. A relationship is a 50:50 deal, even when you are not physically with the other person. It's fun to go out...just don't forget which side your bread is buttered on.
2006-06-13 14:42:20 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO! That's not unreasonable at all. Tell your significant other she needs to get a life, then she won't be worried so much about what you do. See, you're a good one. All you're asking for is once a month. She should be happy it's not every night...That's what some ladies are faced with. She's lucky!
2006-06-13 07:38:54 · answer #3 · answered by mesofemme 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think once a month is more than reasonable. My hubby goes at least once every two weeks and sometimes 3 times in a week. Im guessing she doesn't trust you. otherwise why should she have a problem. I dont have a problem with my husband going. In fact He was out till 6 in the morning watching FIFA with his friends. Everone needs their guy/girl night out
2006-06-13 07:41:23 · answer #4 · answered by La Dee Da 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nobody gets to wear pants in the family where that came from the 1800's?????? look if you want to go out with your friends,come to an understanding with your mate....tell her you dont see why you cant go out with the fellows once and a while, assuming you have never given her a reason to not trust you... tell her you are in a relationship not prison...and come up with the idea that she should go out with the girls too!!! unless you dont think there is enough of pants for all in the family??? chill and enjoy your nights out.good luck
2006-06-13 07:51:34 · answer #5 · answered by boricua_2290 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Each couple is different. Why? Trust levels are different. My guy? He's an adult and I trust that he will make good decisions as one. Therefore, I say do as you please. But, as a couple it is only common courtesy to inform the other party as to your whereabouts and weather or not you will be coming home after said activities. It sounds to me like the problem is your spouses level of trust/security in this relationship. Perhaps you should talk to her and find out just what it is that she isn't comfortable with when you go out with your friends once a month? Good open communication can make or break a deal.
2006-06-13 07:55:56 · answer #6 · answered by Christine K 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been married for 8 years and I would say that is not unreasonable at all. But it all depends in the man, does he stay out all night?? Does he have a track record of cheating?? All kinds of factors come into play
2006-06-13 07:43:18 · answer #7 · answered by staken02 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think its unreasonable, as long as SHE also gets to go out with the girls every once and a while. Also how long have you been married/together? I was like that @ the beginning of our marriage, now Im begging him to leave @ times LOL...
2006-06-13 07:39:35 · answer #8 · answered by Mz_AmanDA 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think as long as you are really going out with your friends and haven't caused any trust issues to arise there is absolutely no reason you can't go at least once a month, just don't stay out all night. You both need a night out to unwind and give each other space.
2006-06-13 07:38:23 · answer #9 · answered by ranger73102 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that it's too much to ask, as long as you and the boys are keeping it "clean" and you aren't home too late. Maybe try and go to a ballgame with the guys and come home when you say you will...once she sees that then she'll trust you more to go out. Just let her know where you're going, what you're doing and what time you will probably be home...the same you would want from her.
2006-06-13 07:42:00 · answer #10 · answered by Melissa E 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋