is virginity important in relationship?

Question

would you marry girl who isnot virgin?

Answer 1

No its not important

Answer 2

Yes it is important and should be virtued but sometimes the person cant help it or have made mistakes before or has been previously married. It all depends on the past of the person that you are planning on marrying whether it be a boy or a girl who is or is not the virgin here. Abstinence before a first marriage is the best way to go though but i would marry the girl whether she was a virgin or not. My wife had been married before so she was not a virgin when i married for the first time but that is okay!

Answer 3

The older you get the answer is it is not as important. For a younger person, I would think your first time should be special. For a man, to be someones first is an honor. To whom deserves this honor more than the man who agrees to be with you forever? Your husband... Think about it affects your security if you knew your man had been with many many women... is he really a catch and special or are you just the flavor of the week. You will always wonder how you stacked up against the others etc... Same goes for a man... if you have been around the block, your relationship isn't all that special is it... how strong will it be in adversity if in your mind and his if you can have the next lover before he can load the car. You only get 1 first time, don't waste on someone who doesn't deserve it or is not going to treat you right. With that said also, if you truly love someone and think they are special, their past is their past... and if you are smart you don't ask certain questions. You may not like the answers as they can shatter the peoples perception they held.

Answer 4

Virginity is important to some people, but most men believe virgins are rare. I actually married someone that had a kid. I dated several girls when I was in high school, a few of them were virgins. It didn't matter to me.

If a guy tells you that being a virgin is important, they either have never had sex because of their looks or messed up principles. If someone really loves you, they wont care about anything from the past.

Answer 5

As for me virginity is my gift for my hubby, though virginity is important but in a relationship the most important is the LOVE to each couple. If a man really loves the woman no matter what virgir or not he will love that woman. What matters most is that you love each other and will accept one another's past.

Answer 6

Virginity is not important at all for me. I don't mind if the woman I marry is a virgin or not.

Answer 7

I think that no man wants to be with a "whore" whatever that means to them but personally, I wouldnt want to be with a virgin either. You have to take into consideration sexual compatibility along with all of the other compatibilities.

Answer 8

My wife was divorced when I met her so if you extend that argument, people could only get married once in their life. The world would be a sadder place if that happened!

Answer 9

yes, why not? I don't see any problem at all coz most importantly is the inner beauty and compatible with each other.

Answer 10

I was a virgin when I met the woman who is now my wife, she was not. Virginity does have a meaning, but it is not all-important.

After the birth of our son, life was very hectic. He was on the hospital for three weeks, and we were commuting back and forth from home. Before he was born, my wife had been in the hospital for two weeks. All of this was due to complications. Once we got him home, I ended up requesting an extension of a month to my leave of absence from work, which made money tighter, even tighter when we received the bill for more than a month stay at the hospital. When I did get back to work, my first two paychecks back were all absorbed by the back medical insurance I hadn't paid in two months. We were almost three months with zero income, and thousands of dollars we didn't have in outlay, and I'm the sole provider in our house. I felt like a failure: I had one all-important job, to keep food on the table and the mortgage paid, and I had failed. To add insult to injury, a few days before our son was born, the sewage line from our house broke, but luckily my father knew something about that and I was thankful that he had time off of work to come and work on the plumbing, but if my son had not come with complications, I would not have been able to take him home the week he was born. Strike two: can't even maintain the house. While our son was in the hospital, to say our sex life was lacking would be an understatement. Once we got him home, we took shifts, so we barley saw each other for meals, let alone anything sexual. This is all expected, of course. Then I finally couldn't take any more time off. I went back to work, and the load of the child care work fell to my wife. I have a two hour commute each way, plus an eight hour day with an hour unpaid lunch in the middle, giving a total of thirteen hours a day that I couldn't avoid being away from home on week days. Driving for two hours on less than a full night's sleep is a very poor idea, so that was another six to seven hours that I was useless. So my wife ended up with more than a couple 30 hour shifts. Strike 3, can't even help take care of the boy. (Though, in retrospect, I would also take him when I came home Fridays, and by the time I went to bed Saturday at noon, I'd been up for more than 30 hours also. But somehow, at the time, that didn't seem to count.)

With three strikes against me, can you imagine my total lack of shock when I logged into myspace one night to read my wife's blog, and right there in her top 8 was one of her ex-lovers? "Of course," I thought to myself. "No wonder she's not interested even when she's had a full night's sleep, a shower, and a square meal." I didn't think she was cheating on me, but I thought I was in competition. With a 13 hour day and a son who constantly needed me, I didn't have the energy to compete. I'd hoped my competing days were over... apparently not.

And when I confronted my wife with it, she said she wasn't talking to him... that she just liked to see how his life was going. She even said it like it was supposed to be comforting to know that my wife needs to keep ties with her ex-lovers, even when not talking to them. She tried to relate it to me talking to my friends, or my ex girlfriends. Well, first, I don't talk to any of my ex-girlfriends on a regular enough basis to add them to Myspace, and second, an ex-lover is an entirely different category than a friend, in my eyes. But then, I don't have any ex-lovers. Maybe it's different if you do. I don't know.

When I asked her to say that I was more important to her sexually than he was, she couldn't. She said she couldn't lie to me. She said point blank that if she somehow had to either give up the few nights they had together, or give up our entire life together, either never had him or never had me, she would rather have those few nights with him. It wasn't heated, it wasn't defensive: it was just honest.

So now I have to live with the knowledge that I am second best in my wife's eyes for the rest of my life. Sure, she married me. She's fond of saying, "You won." I didn't. He did. She has made clear that he could do no wrong when they were together, that he was her most important sexual experience, that having a child with me is second to that, that everything we've ever done, the life we've made together, could all be traded in for a few nights with him. And I have to live with that. The only choice to living with that is to leave her, and I'm not going to do that. I wouldn't even do that if we were without a child. I may not be her best, but she is mine.

That's what virginity means in a relationship: no one is ever second best if you come into it a virgin. My wife will never have to worry about being second best to anyone. I have to live with the knowledge that I am.