ferrets
2006-06-12 16:41:50 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Home & Garden ➔ Do It Yourself (DIY)
The rumor mill has it the ferret was into burglary as a sport! The poor gnomes are turned to stone in sunlight and couldn't tell you what was happening. Have you noticed items missing around your residence? The neighbors are missing items, I've heard. The ferret was setting the gnomes up as the fall guys. Gnomes are known for guarding knowledge and treasure. Rudolf Steiner was spreading the news that Gnomes were protecting the plants in the garden. The ferret was jealous of this attention. So, as the rats in the ivy have it, the ferret was tumbling around with stolen treasures threatening the gnomes with putting the items at the feet of gnomes after the sun came up, making the gnomes look guilty. The mole says the gnomes didn't do it. He says Uncle Frank left his bowling ball on the Porch last night. The ferret was having fun slipping in and out of the bag when it tipped over. Ferret thought this was a fun game! chase the bowling ball! Unfortunately in running around the rolling bowling ball, the ferret wasn't watching and got pinned between the ball and bird bath column. The gnome was trying to free him when the next door neighbor's dog jumped the fence. Ferret had stolen the dog's rabies tag and he had to have the shots again. Dog was P****d!He grabbed him by the neck and started to shake him like a rag doll. The gnomes grabbed ferret's tail and pulled. Dog lost his grip and ferret rolled up into a ball and rolled away. He rolled through the fence and rolled right into a 'possum, popped into the air came down, hit the curb and flew into the street. The street sweeper hit him and the rotating brushes sent his lifeless body over the fence and back into the garden. The neighbor across the streets tomcat was just prowling through the ivy for rat as the ferret hit the grass. Went over and made a swipe at the twitching tale. It was reported the cat hissssssst, "Serves you right for stealing my catnip mousssssssss" By then the sun came up and the gnomes didn't have a prayer.
2006-06-12 17:32:55 · answer #1 · answered by Ding-Ding 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
The ferret had it coming, and from what I hear the gnomes were being bullied by the ferret. Last night the ferret came after them with a hammer, but the gnomes took the hammer away and hit the ferret over the head...you can see how it was self defense
2006-06-12 23:45:50 · answer #2 · answered by Erik 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whoa, murderous gnomes are not good. Turn them in to the gnome police. They need to be put behind bars. Get new gnomes but do a background check on them before getting them.
I'm sorry about your ferret.
2006-06-12 23:44:07 · answer #3 · answered by brand_new_monkey 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm the lawyer for the gnomes. I'm from the office of Whiteman Smalljohnson. And I have recived new evidence that the gnomes were at the strip club all night with your neighbors frogs," Bud is getting married," and it was not the gnomes on the lawn with the hammer, but the flimingos on the drive way with the bird-bath.
2006-06-12 23:50:43 · answer #4 · answered by whitetrashwithmoney 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did the gnomes eat the ferret afterwards? If so you are next !
2006-06-12 23:48:06 · answer #5 · answered by Retarded Dave 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I totally know what you are going through. My neighbor's garden gnomes are evil too. Every nite when I come home from work they toss rocks at me. This hurts. I've seen them dig up flower bulbs and blame the sweet little squirrels. Once, a gnome lit our mailbox on fire. This a federal offence. My neighbors won't beleive me when I tell them about their evil garden gnomes. Keep your eyes on them....they have their eyes on you. That's 4 sure!!!
2006-06-12 23:53:39 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Garden gnomes have been known to turn without warning. You must always keep a close eye on them or the will rebel!
2006-06-12 23:45:44 · answer #7 · answered by Cathy P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
um.i definetly think you should get some help with this one.im not really sure why or how the heck you garden gnomes died, but i heard they were going extinct. good luck with that! let me know how your ferrets are doing!!
2006-06-12 23:44:44 · answer #8 · answered by Quechyyy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
umm i think u should get rid of the gnomes and get some fairies cuz there kooler and get big scary dog instead of ferrets or maybe not smoke as much! lol jk!
2006-06-12 23:47:21 · answer #9 · answered by lucyj 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gnomes are inherently evil, but ferrets are modified skunks, so it evens out, doesn't it?
2006-06-12 23:46:17 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋