im 18 and still a virgin
i dont know why i find both men and women equallt attractive, but i know i could never come out to my parents and family. What should i do because im having problems getting a gf and think it would be easier for me to be with a guy RIGHT NOW.
2006-06-12 15:41:00 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
You are still young and virginity is nothing to be ashamed of. I suggest you look for love....and be open to the gender, then see what happens. True love knows no gender. Look for someone who treats you nice and can be a companion for a lifetime. Hopefully love will find you, it may take time, but you are young and have time. Every new relationship will have you questioning your orientation, relax and let FATE guide you.
2006-06-13 10:25:45 · answer #1 · answered by truckinotter 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being a virgin is admirable at 18, don't listen to what others say. However if it is the companionship that you are looking for, look for it wherever you think FEELS right to you. Don;t settle for anything less.
About your parents...IF you ever decided to be with a man in a relationship, they would eventually find out. You would be suprised, a lot of parents are more accepting than you think they will be. My father is what anyone would call a "good ole boy" Oklahoma native, racist family and upbringing, hit the roof when my sister went to the prom with a black guy. When I told him, he said "I don't care what you do behind closed doors. I love you, you;re my daughter". He has met my gf and loves her, we visit as often as we can. Point is, it was not the reaction I expected. He suprised me, and I adore him for it.
Follow what your heart tells you to do. If you;re heading off for college soon, maybe leave the nest and explore your life a little before you decide on anything. You may never even need to have that talk with your parents.
2006-06-12 23:02:01 · answer #2 · answered by scorp 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Congratulations! Nothing wrong with being a virgin. I was one until I was about 20. I had a boyfriend and wasn't in any hurry. It's a possibility that you just might be bi-sexual. I'd suggest doing some research on bisexuality. If your parents have voiced their opinions in a negative way regarding bisexuality or homosexuality, and you feel that you can't talk to them about your feelings, then I'd suggest talking with an MCC Pastor or a Pastor from another gay-friendly and affirming congregation. Go to the local gay and lesbian center -- if there is one in your area and see if they have any support groups around adult teens coming out.
If you can't find a girlfriend or boyfriend right now -- enjoy being single, getting to know yourself as a young adult, start deciding what you want to do with your life, what profession interests you, whether or not you want to attend college and obtain a degree. Please do not spend this time trying to find the right man or the right woman. YOU BECOME THE RIGHT MAN or THE RIGHT WOMAN and the one that is meant for you will come to you. DISCOVER YOU!
2006-06-12 23:26:16 · answer #3 · answered by cajun7_girl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had conflicted emotions too and remained a virgin until my early 20s. Not that there's anything wrong with waiting, but I missed on some good times for the wrong reason. If you find both men and women attractive thats fine and completly normal. There is nothing wrong with you. While your parents and family may or may not approve of your sexuality you're still their family and they'll still love you. Here's a link to PFLAG's website, they offer support to people in your situation so you don't have to go through this alone:
http://www.pflag.org/
2006-06-13 05:10:30 · answer #4 · answered by sooziebeaker 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel about coming out to your parents, mine found out the hard way, through notes they found in my room from my girlfriend! But there are support groups online that can help you with that part! And the reason WHY you find both men and women equally attractive is because you are bisexual! And thats ok, there are a lot of other bisexuals in this world! And if you want to be with a guy then go for it! But if it's all about losing your virginity, then your crazy, because you should save that for someone your IN LOVE with, it should be special!
2006-06-12 22:51:41 · answer #5 · answered by munkypoo1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do what you feel. You are 18 and have your whole life ahead of you. Why do you feel you have to come out? I thought you felt the "same" about both sexes.
Experiment --- see what is the best for you -- then you have plenty of time to tell the folks!
Just be careful and use your head when you play. There is nothing in the sexual world worth dying for, at your age. You have too much time to figure out what is right for you to be reckless and end up sick.
Enjoy, do what you feel is right for you, at the moment you feel it. Then, when you have worked through all this b.s., you can come out to whoever you want. Don't rush anything at your age. Just enjoy life on a daily basis and live it to the fullest!
2006-06-12 23:19:47 · answer #6 · answered by kc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are in a bad spot right now and I would advise you to talk to your parents . If you don't feel you can do that , then be careful with who you choose for your first time . Make sure that that person is special to you and that your first time will be a good experience . Have you weighed the possibility that you may be bisexual and should explore both sexes before making up your mind . Best of luck and follow your heart .
2006-06-13 00:57:00 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
im bisexual too... and ive hid my sexuality from my family since i was like 9 years old.. and now... im 18.. i told them just last month and they hardly even twitched an eye... my grandma just said okay and nothing has changed... but right now, im in a longterm relationship with a guy... ohh... and dont worry about finding a bf or gf right now... when the time comes, they'll come to you.. and virginity isnt a bad thing... just wait till ur ready... they always say that the longer you wait, the better your first time will be...
2006-06-12 23:28:32 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you can keep your parents in the dark, though it's not advisable. You can also be honest with them. They just might surprise you. I know I couldn't handle lying to mine for long, hence why I came out. It was rough at first, but dad (the Southern Baptist Preacher) surprised me by reaching a point of acceptance in a couple of weeks. Each set of parents is different. If they truly love you, they'll work through it. Go where your heart leads you in both cases (parents and dating).
2006-06-12 22:46:55 · answer #9 · answered by sailordelta 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
is your question about sexual orientation or sex , it is a difference between the two .....and my opinion is that if you find both girls and guys equally attractive, you should go with the opposite sex....it's a lot less stresfull (again, its my opinion).....and i can also tell you having sex with just anyone for the simple fact of not being a virgin anymore is not gona do you any good....meaningless sex doesnt bring you any kind of emotional satisfaction....trust me i know
and having said all of that i conclude by saying i'm gay( and you should really consider this, coming from a gay guy)
2006-06-13 00:30:41 · answer #10 · answered by sexyashell 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋