A good friend of mine is a serious homophobic personality. why does he feel that way. He won't admit it.?

Answer 1

If you could give some examples of what he has done or said that leads you to believe he is homophobic, it might help.

Homophobia is the irrational fear of, aversion to, or discrimination against homosexuality or gay, lesbian, or transgendered people, or toward any behavior, belief, or attitude of self or others, which doesn’t conform to rigid sex-role stereotypes. Homophobia usually begins irrationally with reasons to justify it added later. Extreme homophobia emerges as violence.

I assume that being a good friend, you are familiar with him and how he reacts to things -- most people will not admit to a prejudice, and certainly not easily.

It is possible that some event in his past has caused this. He may be the victim of some childhood sexual abuse that he is represssing (this, incidentally, would be the crime of pedophilia and has NOTHING to do with homosexuality) and it has manifested itself as homophobia.

Many people here have already alluded to what is known as "internalized homophobia," which refers to a prejudice that many homosexuals have against themselves and others like them. This discomfort with or disapproval of one's own sexual orientation will also manifest itself as homophobic behavior or reactions.

He may also fear being identified as homosexual, rightly or wrongly. If he is a particularly sensitve or considerate male, the fear of being labelled as gay can surface.

One test is to substitute a racial or ethnic origin to something he says to see if shows prejudice. For instance, if he were to say:

"Your friend may have a moral objection to African-American BEHAVIOR, but have nothing personal against African-American PEOPLE. If that's the case, he's not racist."

...it would obviously show a prejudice because there is no behavior that is inherently homosexual or African-American, there is only human behavior.

Answer 2

Many people are falsely accused of being "homophobic."

For instance, your friend may have a moral objection to homosexual BEHAVIOR, but have nothing personal against homosexual PEOPLE. If that's the case, he's not homophobic.

Though our popular culture says otherwise, it's still okay to have a religious or moral objection to homosexual conduct.

Perhaps your friend won't "admit it" because he's not guilty of it. Just because your friend doesn't agree with every item on the homosexual political agenda, that doesn't make him a "homophobe."

Answer 3

there are lots of reasons to feel that way. the two that jump out the most in my mind is maybe he was raised to believe that homosexuality goes against nature and is wrong. In that case nothing you can say or do will change it until he's willing to change that attitude on his own. the second reason is maybe deep down he's not sure of his own sexuality and he puts others down to distance himself from them. In that case, there's still not much you can do other than be there for him to support him or call some of this homophobic statements into question (but only in a gentle and supportve way.).

Answer 4

Your friend is entitled to his own opinions about gays, however as society matures and learns to deal with and accept homosexuality (regardless of whether people are born with it or become homosexual later in life, does not change the fact that its a lifestyle that many people are choosing to live), he will get hate for his opinions.

Seriously though, recent research has shown that a very unproportionate number of people expressing homophobic tendencies and opinions, are in fact, homosexual, and refuse to accept it because they understand they social issues concerning it. I think it has a lot to do with control issues. But the studies are pretty interesting, they did tests on homophobic men, showed pictures of all types of sexual stimuli (erotic photos of women, men, women with men, men with men, women with women, and even acts involving children), and were able to track their arousal. It's interesting, but if you think about it, makes a lot of sense.

Homosexuality didn't just start up all of a sudden. People have been gay since the beginning of time. We may never really know the numbers of gay people because so many refuse to accept it. In 50 years, there wont be more gay people. There will just be more gay people that are out of the closet.

Answer 5

The word homophobia was invented by the gay community to cover up the fact that there are people who are intelligent enough to question why. The gay community had no facts, logic, scientific proof, logic or reasoning to back up their claims. So they labeled anyone who questioned them as homophobic, bigoted, ignorant and so on. Yet, still after hurling these words at heterosexuals, some heterosexuals still did not succumb to the gay communities rhetoric. This angers the gay community that some heterosexuals will not fall to their indoctrination It not only angers them, it scares them. How can the gay community gain acceptness when there are people out there intelligent enough to question why? Who actually think for themselves. ABSURD!

To have the intelligence to question why, shows that one has a critical mind, to think critically. Not "getting it", on controversial social issues is a critical thinker. The critical thinker is looking for the facts, logic, reasoning and scientific proof. To the critical thinker, simply being told they are ignorant, homophobic or bigoted is laughable, childish. They identify this attempt by homosexuals for what it is, name calling.

I give your friend credit for being able to think for himself. He is not so easily taken in by what is trendy in the pop culture.



( If you don't stand for something you'll fall for anything )

Answer 6

hes probably gay....people who cant place their fears, therefore cant find a good reason for their fear are usually afraid of themselves....their fear comes from within them....hes afraid of being gay so he takes it out on all the gay people.....he thinks that by being a homophobe people wont suspect him as being gay.....or otherwise hes just plain ignorant, either way hes got some issues and you might be able to help him overcome them by being there for him and not bailing out on him now......support is what he needs

Answer 7

you can run but you cant hide.face the facts of life if hes gay.sooner or later he will admit and face the truth.not that life will be easy for him. gays will never be totaly excepted on this earth.

Answer 8

No offense mayby you got in his face about it. I had a friend who was uncomfortable around gays. She was just afraid of being in a compromising situation.

Answer 9

homophobics are either gay or bi or just plain out brainwashed by some parent figure(s).

Answer 10

Maybe he's a little afraid, because he doesn't understand being gay.