im in love with a 16 year old soon to be 17. Her mother doesn't agree with us being together. she is stuck in the past and cant see out of that. yes i was imature but now im a stable man working and out of trouble. i love her daughter dearly and i dont want to hurt her, but she's young and her mother keeps getting in the way. she has left her house in the past and i was their to help her. i never disrepected her when she was in my house, but her mother blaims me for her daughter been the way she is. she has been having problems with her mother for a quiet some time now. what can i do? what should i do? i really dont want to leave her. shes my heart and my reason to keep moving on in life. if it wasn't for her i wouldn't be where i am today. Im lost and confuse.
2006-06-12 11:41:48 · 15 answers · asked by elcangridel85 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
im am 20
2006-06-12 11:54:02 · update #1
i guess no one really understand. no one knows the situation better than i do. thank for trying to help. im the victom in this situation. her mother is the one that dont comprende, she still judge a books by its cover. I really do respect her and her daughter thats why i haven't interfear.
2006-06-12 12:02:28 · update #2
well you don;t say how old you are--but i figure maybe 20 or something--it seems you were a punk or tough before -and now you got a break and some work and you got a girl you care about--it seems you got an unstable girl-and a not so pleased mom---you don't have the best of education(i'm not dising you--just saying--but you got work and you got a place to live and you want to try to do good for yourself and by her)
If i was you i get that a--ss of yours in gear and be a man--now it doesn't seem like mom is beating the crap out of her -- or wringing her neck--however -she may be nagging cos the girl is distracted or unmotivated-
now the best thing you can have happen is instead of mom blaming you for the way her daughter is -- would be for her to thank you-- for the way her daughter is-
so instead of thinking about your bleeding heart at the moment-think about you and the girl in the future-
And the truth is--no matter how you slice it--that the best thing this girl can do is get an education and a good one
you got a job--put a certain amount of money away a month for her to go to college-- don't distract her from her schooling -get her motivated to achieve-- get permission to reward her -with a fun weekend out or whatever--keep this going - get a focus-- make all happy- hang out--share dreams and hopes-but don't get needy or sappy or dumb---let your girl achieve-feel good and whole -her mom be proud-- and if shes your reason-- keep it motivated-and when she s graduated from college--marry her.
get with a plan -stan-
be a good man
make the women happy-
and get yourself gold
and a diamond for a ring -and wedding -when she graduates college -and only then-and DO NOT GET HER PREGNANT!!!before the end of her schooling--that would be silly----very--very silly-and dumb-- and don't let her (the girl) let you let up on her to achieve or find an excuse not to do--it -- get her through it--its a good thing-- for sure__
its a truth- its good -absolute
for all-
that's what i do
you gotta make mom like ya--it'll only be problems later or coming back to haunt you -if you don't-ain't going to be the smoothest of rides--so do it positive for all of you-- couple of years later-- it could be very smooth-very sweet-
see the picture--GOOD!!
do it!
good luck-it'll work
cheers
2006-06-12 12:11:40 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very bad situation you have there. You never said how old you were. I would suggest she is still a minor and under the control of her parents and you should never interfer in any way to include letting her stay with you when she ran away. Her parents would have respected you more if you took her home and did the right thing. I would suggest cooling your heals until she becomes an adult. If she loves you now she will love you then.
2006-06-12 18:46:21 · answer #2 · answered by Mike M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old are you?
If you're an adult living on your own, what you can do is respect her mother's wishes. If you love this girl dearly, then you want what is best for her. I don't care how "mature" she is...she's 16....it's her mother's JOB to get in the way and protect her daughter!
2006-06-12 18:44:58 · answer #3 · answered by circe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first it depends on how old you are. If you're older than 19 then it would be best to listen to her mother. If you're not older than 19 then you should have a talk with her mother/father and tell her you have changed into a respectible man and are truly in love with their daughter and would like to earn their well deserved respect.
2006-06-12 18:46:29 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
lost and confused, you failed to tell us your age. it doesn't really matter, if you are trying to take moms daughter , you expect mom to give her up without a fight. mom got up in the middle of the night when daughter was young, fed her. when she had a temperature, mom took care of her, and now you want to sidetrack moms plan for daughter to be happy. mom has 16 years of her life invested in daughter. you are asking mom to turn her over to you after you have disappointed her in the past. try and see it from moms perspective. you may get more cooperation from mom that way. put yourself in moms place , would you let you run off with your daughter? you talked about mom and no dad so I take it he isn't in the picture. if you were dealing with dad, there wouldn't even be an argument. dad would say hell no and that would be it. you and I both know that don't we? give daughter time to reach the age of emancipation and mom won't have a say in it. if she is worth having, she is worth waiting for.
2006-06-12 18:57:43 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Remember, she is a minor and still living in her Mother's house. If she really loves you then allow her to become of age then see if you two are meant to be together.
2006-06-12 18:47:58 · answer #6 · answered by katydidthattoo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you are lost and confused. A younger woman can do nothing for you except run up your bills. How old are you anyway? You Cradle Robber you! LOL Get an older woman and you'll find out what's up!
2006-06-12 18:45:01 · answer #7 · answered by almondjoy_1000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, That would depend on your age. She is not an adult yet, and it sounds like you need to step back and let her and her mother get through their problems on their own.
2006-06-12 18:51:06 · answer #8 · answered by jenn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
elnenefeo,
i know what your going through and i personally think that if you LOVE her like you say you do then you'll NEVER give up on trying...i know that she loves you to death and that she will NEVER EVER give up on trying with you...a lot of people love you can care about you a lot even if you dont think so...becuase i do and even if things go wrong between you two dont mean that she'll ever stop loving you...becuase i know that she will NEVER stop loving you!!!...your probably thinking whos this and how do i know that she loves you...you know me and when you find out who it is gimme a call or email me!!!@my email...Love you...SOS
2006-06-12 20:28:28 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
im sorry. you should prove to the mother that you love her daughter and you can care for her in any situation. hope it works out!
2006-06-12 19:25:21 · answer #10 · answered by penny18_cf 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋