My question, in your very first love relationship, when you broke up or if you broke up after you found him cheating, the next real love relationship you have, do you hold back a little bit of yourself so you won't get hurt again? If you do or did, for how long? Or are you still holding back a bit after many years?
2006-06-12 08:37:30 · 4 answers · asked by Andy S 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I have been hurt by guys/men most of my life (from the time I was born until over a year ago). Each time I was with someone new, I would hold something back. I was scared to death and didn't want to give all of myself. Plus, considering how my home life was growing up, I wasn't sure of how much to give. No wonder I was with an abuser for 21 years!! Now that I am with someone I consider my soulmate, I give him my all. I have never felt so comfortable with someone else in all my life! I am, finally, who I have always wanted to be when around somene else. :)
2006-06-12 08:51:55 · answer #1 · answered by honey 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Oh yes! It's called baggage! Everyone has something they carry into the next relationship. I had a boyfriend who was verbally abusive...he was stopped by the police once for speeding and he yelled at me afterwards because HE was angry. When I was with my next boyfriend (now husband of 10+ years), he was pulled over. I kept apologizing and apologizing and asking if he wanted to forget about our plans and go home. He was bewildered! He wasn't ONE bit angry at anyone..the police, me or anything!
It took me some time to realize that the other guy's baggage WAS NOT my husband's baggage! I'm just glad I didn't ruin OUR relationship because of it.
2006-06-12 17:33:26 · answer #2 · answered by iam1funnychick 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with Christy you lose some innocense there. It is just like your heart gets a little harder around the outside so nothing ever gets as close to it as before. That kind of hurt is so deep. Then you get mad. The worst kind is when they are cheating and you think about them with someone else that really hurts and I don't think you will ever let someone get really close to you again. Kind of your way of protecting yourself.
2006-06-12 15:58:50 · answer #3 · answered by T B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have to hold something back because that first time, you are so innocent and naive. then when it goes bad, you never fully recover and it's nearly impossible to recapture that lost innocence.
2006-06-12 15:44:52 · answer #4 · answered by Christy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋