my husband was cought cheating on me, by my daughter, and he says that she is lying even though ahe was breaking her heart when she told me, and all my friends told me the same thing that happened, so can any one tell me, how can he deny this after all the evidence against him.....
2006-06-12 08:05:48 · 36 answers · asked by gizzyllan 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I wouldn't trust him. My husband did the same - denied it until he just couldn't deny it any more.
It was really difficult but I kicked him out and now, only 2 months later I am happier than ever. It doesn't matter what his reasons are for cheating, if it was that bad, he should've tried to sort it out before going off with someone else.
So sorry for the heartache he has caused you. BE STRONG!
2006-06-13 08:37:53 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 7⤊ 1⤋
Men will deny everything unless you have hard evidence. I think you daughter telling you is enough you need sometimes friends are not the most trustworthy people, even the best ones.
Try and find a way of catching him. Phone bills, photos, letters or finding them together.
I dont believe in the saying "once a cheat always a cheat".
You can get trust back. Me and my partner are still trying after 1 year. You do know your husband but sometimes people change. You have to start by getting him to admit it then you have to get to know eachother again.
2006-06-12 08:22:47 · answer #2 · answered by carolyn s 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is denying because he is a liar. You will NEVER trust him again. The second you or him are not together the thoughts that run through your head will not be good. You might try to keep him just out security, but he will cheat again or has cheated before even this. Remember, at some point in your life you have looked at someone else and wondered how could they not know that their spouse is cheating, but still you wouldn't tell them. Realize now that you have a heads up and please don't take him over your daughter.
2006-06-12 09:09:14 · answer #3 · answered by princss_19 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry, maybe if he'd come clean then there'd be some basis to work on. He's doubled the pain by making your daughter out to be a liar/ trouble maker and making you feel like you're going nuts; that's just unforgivable. As for trust that either comes from you or it doesn't, you can't help the person you are. Me, once my trust has gone it's gone, I wish I was a 'bigger' person but I'm not. He has given you no true grounding to base your trust on has he, silly guy. I would say you probably know that it will rear it's head again and again. You don't have to stay in an unhappy relationship.
2006-06-12 08:15:50 · answer #4 · answered by crabbit 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry you are going through this terrible event in your life. Your life can change in an instant when this happens.
Whether you can ever trust him again depends on why it happened. There are circumstances in which an underlying cause creates a situation for someone that under normal circumstances they would never approach.
Unfortunately, in order to determine whether or not you can continue with your marriage, he needs to come clean and the two of you need to have a healthy conversation about why it happened and how it can be prevented in the future. Sure, it is easy to say "kick him to the curb" but that is not always the right answer.
What ever happens, remember you must take care of yourself. There is a lot of advice out there but no one is going through exactly what you are. You need to make the right decision for you.
2006-06-12 09:03:58 · answer #5 · answered by n b 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it comes very easy to people who cheat to deny it. If you want to trust him then you both need to set down and have a very serios talk. First thing is if he tells you he hasnt cheated fine go with that because let me tell you it will eat away at him if he loves you at all. And its not fair for you to have to deal with his infidelity so let him deal with it. Either it stops and you two make it work or you dont. I have found that much easier to spend time making it work than spending time harping over the past. You unfortunately have to just instill that trust in him again , but at the same time nothing wrong with him earning your trust back. Good luck know what your going through
2006-06-12 08:23:03 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all,how old is your daughter and what exactly did she see?
Even if your husband was actually cheating(which is possible),the fact that he's denying it shows he still loves you and wants to be with you.
Away with the fairies said it all in her answer:Follow her advice,clear the air and then never mention it again -even in your thoughts.
Your husband will appreciate it and you will grow into a more mature person,who can rise above anything.
Remember Hilary Clinton? The whole world knew.......
2006-06-12 09:10:40 · answer #7 · answered by Emma Woodhouse 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have three choices:
1/ Chuck him out - but what will that achieve?
2/ Never trust him again and allow this thing to eat away at you forever
3/ Clear the air totally and let him know that you don't believe him and that if he ever sets a foot wrong again he is out. And then, NEVER, EVER MENTION IT AGAIN. Just forget it and move on. If you ever dwell on this, ever mention it again, ever throw it in his face in the heat of an argument, you are doomed.
If you love him and want to be with him, then option three is your only choice. Clear the air and get over it. Remember, he chose you. He could have left you but he didn't - he elected to stay with you, she was just a sh*g. And don't believe it when you're told he'll do it again. That's not necessarily true ...
2006-06-12 08:16:06 · answer #8 · answered by Away With The Fairies 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him...if not for you for your daughter!
He cheated and got busted now he is trying to put it on your daughter like she has a vendetta against him or something.....By reading the question I would have said if you love him and want to be with him that's on you but with the additional information your husband is a loser! He's not even man enough to say I messed up; forgive me....He's gonna stick to his lie 'til the end (which hopefully for your sake will be soon!)
2006-06-12 08:16:28 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel for you i just found out that my partner has been cheating on me for 7 months. Do you think that he will do this to you again i know why my partner cheated i was pushing him away and not sorting out our problems, we are trying to move on.
If you think that you can make it work try and do it make a nice cleann start sort out your problems and find out why he cheatedand over come them i know its hard trust me i really understand i wanted to kill him and she had the goul to come to my house and left with a black eye i have to say that felt good.
Try and get rid of the anger and he is with you not her there must be something worth saving but it will be hard he will have to prove to you that you can rebuild that trust and he will have to work hard at it. Just give him a chance and if he makes one wrong move then kick him out thats what i am doing good luck and if you want to chat mail me i know what you are going through xx
2006-06-12 22:21:35 · answer #10 · answered by dizzymooo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋