He says if we do a dna test and its not his he is going to leave me.
We live together and when I tell him I want to move out he always begs me to stay.
He knows the situation and he is staying by my side for now and he wants to be involved with me for now but after the test it may change.
He knows that I can move in with my grandma but he said that i can stay here until i get my own place.
How do I know if he is playing games or if he is really true to his word? And how would I know if he is going to be here for me and the baby but he is just scared?
He says he will leave me if this is not his daughter but he wants me to stay around. Why doesnt he want me to leave?
2006-06-12 06:55:44 · 27 answers · asked by mzwood06 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
you are in a big ol mess...leave him, now...get a paternity test after the baby is born...let whoever is the baby's daddy know they are and seek a lawyer to establish child support...stop "whorin" around and raise this kid as best you can...
2006-06-12 06:58:33 · answer #1 · answered by twentythree 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He wants to have his cake & eat it, too. I assume you're putting out for him?? Why would he let go of a 'sure thing' & go back to working for it?
And: Of course you can't trust him; you can't even trust yourself! (After all: If you could, there would be no doubt about the fatherhood...)
So, you both have some serious issues to work out! Not the least of which is trusting each other. I think you should move in with your grandma right now, & 'reset' your relationship with him, starting from a point where you can both trust each other, and hopefully work your way back together permanently.
You aren't clear on whether he is demanding a DNA test; is he? If so, it will be better for you & baby to be settled with grandma, anyway; in case the results turn out bad for him. If not, the separation will force him to evaluate his commitment to you regardless of the paternity issue. Don't move back with him until you can be trusted, he knows he can trust you, and you're both ready to make a firmer commitment to each other and the baby, no matter whose it might possibly be.
2006-06-12 07:11:42 · answer #2 · answered by M Huegerich 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi,
If you are very sure that the baby is not his, I really think you must move out. He should not be using you for his satisfaction!! But make sure that the baby is not his if you are planning to move. If it is his, then you are at ease. Plus I assure you that its not that easy to perform a DNA test these days. They will ask for substantial proof. So if you are not married, well you can say he is in a soup!! If the child is not his, I really think that you should move over to your grand mother's place. Just remember that you have a child and have a future. You should not only support yourself, but You have a baby to support too!! Considering all this, I really think you should move. At the same time, if your boyfriend really loves you, tell him the truth. Its better that way, but if he is going to play dirty, its better you move.
Best Wishes
2006-06-12 07:05:55 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like he is living under the impression for now that the baby is his and therefore is looking out for u and baby's best interests, u should probably consider urself lucky to have his support at this point.I actually must give him some credit for being so considerate and caring for u after what u have done.I dont mean to sound ignorant as i have no idea what the full circumstances are,but i really do feel that people who betray like that are very cruel and heartless. I hope that u have more regard for your baby's feelings and well being than u have for this guy. Again i dont mean to be ignorant and dont know the whole situation, Best of luck to u :)
2006-06-12 07:06:12 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men feel a deep attachment to their families... they are much more likely to abandon a child that is not theirs. I recommend that you get the DNA test. In any case, it's better know. Then if the results show that the child is not his, moving in with your grandma may not be a bad option. If the results show the child as being his, he will definitely want you to stick around, as he will feel that he is building a family. So in short, the reason why he wants you to stay is because at heart he wants a family, but he doesn't want to be involved if it's not his family.
2006-06-12 06:59:51 · answer #5 · answered by Kristen S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you are in a crappy situation and im sorry even though its your fault. You should just get a test. I think its only fair to the baby to know who is the father. If it turns out that your BF is the father, then you are saved. If he isnt the father, then he'll prolly leave yu....but just try and be strong...if he definitly cant live without you, then hell stay no matter what
2006-06-12 07:02:26 · answer #6 · answered by gigerninfo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
And well he doesnt want you 2 leave yet bcoz he still loves u...he still had feelings 4 u...he cares 4 u. he wants 2 be wit u.
if its not ur bf's baby...he wouldnt care coz he cares about u..he might be upset but he wouldnt get all mad n crazy....if he's like that well DUMP him...he doesnt care for u...even if its not his baby...he would be right there next 2 you...caring and protecting u...if he really cares for u.
i hope this helps u a little dont try 2 get ur self in anymore of this kind of situations.
2006-06-12 07:03:39 · answer #7 · answered by ♥uR mY eVeRyThInG♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He obviously cares about you enough to not let you fall flat on your face, even though you implied you cheated on him.
And you can't be sure if that's how he'll feel after he finds out what happens, but at least he's trying to handle it the best he can considering the circumstances. But always be prepared for the worst though.
Only a doormat would want to raise someone else's child that was conceived when you were supposed to be his.
2006-06-12 07:02:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He probably still loves you even though you did him wrong. But he answered the other part of your question, he said he will leave you if the baby isn't his. Simple, have the DNA test and go from there. Hopefully you'll be a better mom than girlfriend.
2006-06-12 06:59:30 · answer #9 · answered by joyce82367 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
for you leave the situation cause your bf is gonna make you feel like crap, just at least til you know for sure that it is your BF . You do not need any emotional drama while you atre pregnant, time to start thinking of that innocent life you are carrying .That child will always be around ,, but BOYFRIENDS comes around ALL THE time . You know! Sorry for being so blunt , but that baby is what is important her not ur MAn ,,, ok sorry
2006-06-12 07:02:19 · answer #10 · answered by Melimel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I REALLY DONT KNOW .. BUT WHY DO YOU WANT TO WAIT TILL THE BABY IS BORN.. HAVE THE DNA BEFORE SHES BORN.. THAT WAY BEFOR SHE GETS HERE YOU CAN HAVE A STABLE AND HELTHY ENVIORMENT FOR HER..
YOU MESSED UP.. BUT NOW YOURE CONSERN SHOULDNT BE WEATHER OR NOT HES GOING TO STAY ARROUND. YOU SHOULD BE CONSERND ABOUT WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO FOR YOURE LITTLE GIRL...
TALK TO HIM AND TELL HIM "R U GOING TO BE WITH ME FOR BETTER OR WORSE THROUGH THICK AND THIN,, OR NOT"
THIS IS NO TIME FOR YOU TO STAY WITH ONE FOOT OUTSIDE THE DOOR.. ETHER HE IS AND WILL BE THERE FOR YOU BOTH OR NOT..
HAVE AND ANSWER ASAP AND IF HE WONT .. IM SURE YOU WILL BE A STRONG AND GOOD MOTHER ALL BY YOURE SELF...
GOOD LUCK AND BEST WISHES... IF YOU NEED SOMEONE TO TALK TO E-MAIL ME...
2006-06-12 07:11:24 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋