OK which do you think is worst going to a park and talking to some girl about you problems with your spouse and being gone for 5 hrs or just riding on the back of some guys motorcycle.
see my husband disappeared for 5 hrs a couple of weeks ago and i found out later on that he was with some girl at work and talking to her about our problems.
Well all i did is smoke a couple of cigs and have one drink thoughout the last couple of weeks i dont normally do that but i did cause i was stressed i also just rode on the back of my friends husbands motorcyclce and i barely touched him but my husband is mad but i thin doing what he did was much worst.so what do you guys think?
2006-06-12 05:41:08 · 19 answers · asked by nikki 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Discussing problems with an outsider, and not discussing with YOU... bad.
Sitting on the back of someone's motorcycle. What harm? Barely touching him...
I think he was wrong in not discussing your mutual problems with you FIRST.
You did nothing wrong in my opinion. Going off on a motorcycle, I don't see the problem.
I agree with you, what he did was much worse.
2006-06-12 06:05:40 · answer #1 · answered by Balaboo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are both guilty of inappropiate behavior! You shouldn't be zooming down the rode on the back of another mans bike whether you know him or not and your husband should not be confiding in another woman about you all's problems. You should be communicating with one another. Look at you guys! During a time when you need to be together discussing issues in your marriage, you both are turning to outside parties to relieve tension. Not to mention, parties of the opposite sex. This is how affairs get started. Stress is not a good excuse to "hang out " with someone else. Instead, go for a quiet drive with your husband. Or wait until you are both calm and talk about what is bothering you.
2006-06-12 13:01:01 · answer #2 · answered by Poetess_4U 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is perfectly natural for your husband to seek a woman's opinion of the problems you are having. As for your motorcycle ride-it was your friend's husband,. not some stranger. He needs to lighten up-having a few drinks and a smoke? Well, guess what, you are an adult, and if he doesn't like it, then too bad. You two need to sit down and have a serious talk. If you don't have trust and open communication lines, then your relationship is doomed.
2006-06-12 12:48:35 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are both wrong and playing with fire.
If you both continue to "work you issues" with other people, things are NOT going to get any better. Marriage consists of two people, and other people have no say or no do in it, regardless of how harmless the situation may be.
If your relationship is in trouble, talk to each other about it, not others because that will just fuel-up the situation, If you need mediation, seek the help of a counselor, pastor or mutual friend to help you sort out your differences.
Good luck!
2006-06-12 12:50:25 · answer #4 · answered by Blunt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like tit for tat. You did something suspicious and after he found out so did he. You two have some trust issues. One isnt worse than the other. You are both emotionally detaching from each other. Talk to each other. Get everything out in the open. No secrets. People need to communicate more it would solve a lot of problems.
2006-06-12 14:37:32 · answer #5 · answered by Stewiesgal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are both in the wrong. An eye for an eye doesn't work. You need to tell your husband that he should be discussing your marriage with you, and not anyone else. It's not their business.
The best thing you could have done was talked to your husband instead of riding on the motorcycle with someone elses husband. Your husband may use that as an excuse for his actions.
Make time for you both to discuss what's going on in your marriage, so it can be resolved.
Good Luck!
2006-06-12 12:53:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not get into marriage couseling together --- don't hook up with others - such as going for rides with a guy on his motorcycle or cozing up with a woman in the park for 5 hours --- that's called a date!(my reason for saying that --- it didn't address and solve your marital issues, they have now become worse.) If you two have problems work on them together with an experienced person or counselor. Otherwise it will look like you both are seeing other people....
2006-06-12 13:21:38 · answer #7 · answered by jaimestar64cross 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, but it sounds like you were getting back at him by hopping on this friends bike, is that right?
Have a drink, sit down and figure out what has him talking with someone else about your problems. Him turning to someone else (male or female) tells me he can't talk to you. There's something there he needs to get out - let him, it will open up the lines and you two can work it out. Good luck and don't be petty with each other!
2006-06-12 12:54:29 · answer #8 · answered by hotleggz 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well did he know you where going on the mororcycle if so then he is wrong, if he didn't know then you are just as wrong for being with another man behind his back, the cigs and smoke don't even come into play that is your decision and it is your body, but he has no right to go outside the marriage to talk about what goes on inside the marriage that is between the 2 of you
2006-06-12 12:49:01 · answer #9 · answered by mimismom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this sounds like an unhealthy relationship. If he is going to talk to another girl about you, then he obviously needs attention from someone else. and if you are so upset that he was talking to another girl, then there is no trust. Both of you probably need to reevaluate the relationship. I dont think you should stick with a guy who talks crap about you. I think thats wrong. Especially with another girl.
2006-06-12 13:14:45 · answer #10 · answered by kw11 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋