How big of a role does sex play in lasting relationships? Can it last if the sex is not full filling?

Question

Can a relationship continue forward if the bedroom life is weak? Would you marry someone who was unable to full fill you sexually? If you say yes, what makes you think you (or them) would not be effected by it?

Answer 1

Sex is a big part of marriage. But a successful marriage is a lot more than sex AND love. Think of it as a business contract. Or hiring a team member. Look at the person's qualities. Honesty, loyalty, compassion. He she a person of character? Gives to charity? Passionate about life? Educated, if not at least wants to be? Can you imagine this person the parent of your children? Will you be proud of this person at thanksgiving dinners?

Looks go a way too, not just the sexiness, but the ability to dress properly at different gatherings. To talk and walk properly when needed. You dont want a ghetto girl hoochie mama who cant put two words of English together, or sits or walks like she is a teenager. Or a guy who is born with a stick up his butt, overly judgemental, not compassionate, narrowminded.

Of course you cant even picture the one you love in these words right now. But step back from the infatuation and look carefully at this person. There are soooo many factors that play in a good marriage. How does this person deal with a crisis? With your parents?


Now onto sex. It IS important. If you are not having good sex, then you will want to have it, and if you dont know how to please yourself at least, you will begin to want it from others. And if others hit on you sometimes, you may make the biggest mistake of your life.

Your partner may not be very experienced, but may be willing and eager to learn and with a few months practice, you guys may be having a great time. So dont shut the door if sex isnt great. It could be that he she is young and innocent. Believe me, having someone inexperienced but willing who turns out to be great is wonderful. Its develops a loving romantic sensual relationship and you have all these memories of your silly mistakes, ideas etc. Its great fun journeying toward great sex together.


ON the other hand, you could have a man who doesnt want to touch you down there, or a woman who doesnt like positions you really like. And your partner could be very closed to that. Or maybe the frequency is not as much as you like.

In this case you have to see if you can change yourself. Do you really want to lose a really really good person, because of one factor? It doesnt seem right. Sometimes you may have to adjust yourself for the marriage. (this happens in non sex related things all the time). If you can please yourself that may help. Or YOU may be the one who needs to experiment to find what works for BOTH of you.

So.. sex is a big deal. But marriage is much more than sex.

Answer 2

Tricky question cause every relationship is different. I personally don't think sex is the be all and end all of a marriage. Ask yourself this question: If I got married and 2 years later my partner was unable to have sex for whatever reason is my love, caring, and mutual respect for that person enough to make me stay without the sex part? Cause if it wouldn't be then no u shouldn't marry if it is then yeah u should. Things happen we never know what the future holds. I believe most marriages fail simply because we change as we age and want different things in our lives that our partner just doesn't want or can't accept. I don't think it has a whole lot to do with the sex

Answer 3

The sex is not the main focus of a marriage but I believe that it is a factor that can cause problems. If you are truly IN LOVE with the person and they return the same feelings then most definately a maarrige can last if the sex is not fulfilling. THere are other methods to making the sex life better. Try toys, differnt positions and you can even try watching movies to get you both going. I know one thing that always works for me is if my husband barely touches my body ( all over ) not enough to have any pressure but just enough that I can feel him there. It gets all of the senses going and it just gets better from there.

Answer 4

It is a big deal to some people and not so big to others. Yes a relationshipo can go forward even if sex life is a little week. But try to spice things up and make things more fun too. It is not all about sex however it should be more about making love and intimacy. Seek counseling and help too and also maybe even see a sex therapist too!

Answer 5

I married someone before I had sex with him. Sex is icing on the cake. The rest of the relationship has to have substance before the action in the bedroom is even a factor. If you want to have a relationship based on sex alone, you're up a creek with this one. However, with a little patience, you could teach your partner how to be better in that department.

Answer 6

I don't think a relationship will succeed if the sex part is crap. Personally, I need a fulfilling sex life in order to be happy with my partner, and I don't think I'd marry someone who couldn't fulfil me sexually. If you're not sexually compatible, then maybe you're not meant to be together. "Good enough" is not enough.

I knew someone who was sexually incompatible with their wife but married her anyway. She seemed stable, and he needed stability. They tried to make it work for 26 yrs, and he cheated on her (and she on him) for the entire marriage. They're now in the process of getting divorced.

Answer 7

For many it plays a big role.for others a lesser part of a relationship. No set rule. What do you want, A lover, a friend or both. just being lovers does not last. Lovers and friends have a lot better chance.

Answer 8

For young people sex is very important. Incompatibility in sexual desires can break relationships. However if their love is very deep and strong, a couple can still stay together and love each other even if they don't have sex anymore.