2006-06-11 20:20:05 · 22 answers · asked by Unknown 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
When I was 16, They took it surprisingly well, I really found that I underestimated peoples ability to handle the news and their attitudes - often you are pleasently surprised.
2006-06-11 20:26:19 · answer #1 · answered by foxtel_iq 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am the oldest person to answer this. I am 63 and still not totally out of the closet. I was married and gay for ten years, had four beautiful children. Came out to my wife when I was34, as well as my family. From that point onward I have chooses to be very discreet and tell only those I felt needed to know for one reason or another. Most of the time it was because people were trying to fix me up with a women. I will only tell a person or group of people if I am comfortable. You will need to be comfortable with this very private issue. Good luck my friend and remember to be safe Reactions of family was very surprising as for my friends that would be another story for another time. Not good for the most part, got past it and have been going ever since. If they truly love you for who you are then you will have no problem.
2006-06-18 17:05:53 · answer #2 · answered by samkimberly_peopleplace 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It was a week before my 15th birthday.
My siblings and friends took it well, my mother and father started to blame one another. I just stood my ground and said that it was nobody's fault. They then said they had actually discussed it with each other previously and had known even before I told them.
After about 6 months we were able to discuss it and they are totally fine with it now.
When you come out you must keep in mind that your parents have a preconceived dream for you - and that dream's basis is always for you to be happy. Their idea of happiness does not always include a same sex partner, mostly because they know that there are still a lot of stigma and difficulty pertaining to the lifestyle.
My whole family is now at the point (15 years later) that they'll phone and speak to my girlfriend and not to me!
(Which I appreciate)
2006-06-12 06:32:12 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Started at 35 with colleagues and friends but didn't tell my family for two more years. Obviously I waited much too long and wasted my best years. Every day, every hour spent agonizing over this decision is completely wasted, so if you need advice you can really use, I would urge you to come out where and when it is safe to do so (depending on your situation). Do not fear coming out because of losing someone's love (parents especially). If you can truly love yourself for who you are, you will intuitively know how to teach other people to respect that, and you might then be able to show a few others how to love themselves.
2006-06-12 05:16:59 · answer #4 · answered by fall2005buseng 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It would not have been safe for me to come out of the closet when I was still financially dependant on my parents. My step-father was violently homophobic. He was always afraid that I was gay and often abused
I was 21 when I finally came out. The process began at 19, but it took me a few years to get around to telling family. I didn't get the chance to tell my mom. Brother's friend outted me. Step-father just said, "I always knew he was a ******." My biological father didn't really accept it until a couple of years ago. He just met my my partner of 15 years in 2004. He and I didn't have any contact with each other for over a decade. We never had a discussion about it.... I knew how he felt and I didn't want to confront that. When he was willing to accept it, he contacted me and invited me and my bf to thanxgiving at his house. We went, had a great time.
As for telling friends...
Most of my teen year friends were church friends. Most of them didn't accept it at all and felt I was turning my back on god by even admitting such a thing. The friends who didn't reject me are still friends to this day.
I think the most important thing to remember when "coming out" is that MOST PEOPLE DON'T NEED TO KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT YOUR SEX LIFE. The rest can find out on a need to know basis. Don't define yourself by your sexual orientation. People with good lives find that sex is only a very small part of a very full life. Have fun and good luck.
2006-06-12 08:34:50 · answer #5 · answered by Dustin Lochart 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My answer to your question is just to tell you about me, in no way intended for you to behave like me. Coming out is a very personal & difficult decision. Give yourself time & search your own comfortable zone. I simply never assumed to be in a closet, very early I understood what I liked & never struggled with it. Accidentally I would bump into a cousin or family friend in a tell-tale kind of situation, I'd take a deep breath, hold it in, while I counted 1 to 10, than I would assume an air that this is all normal, and carried-on. My mother always tried to pry it out of me, I wouldn't confirm or deny it, I figured as my mother she knew it better than I....she eventually stopped grilling me. I LOVE MY MAMA
2006-06-12 03:39:19 · answer #6 · answered by Earth Ling 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To my friends I was 14 and they were cool, half of them guessed it right off. My parents found out when i was 15. (dad found a note from my gf at the time in my room) My dad took it rather well. My mother... she didnt. She wanted nothing to do with me after that for a while. Shes come around since then though, shes even coming to my wedding! I have learned that if they take it bad the first time around, just give them time.
2006-06-12 04:06:53 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I came out when I was 18, and was chastised by all. So I went back in, even dated men(hating every moment of it, but wanted to be accepted)I have recently came out again, and that is where I am staying. This is who I am and everyone can like it or leave! I am not living a lie anymore!
2006-06-12 15:14:53 · answer #8 · answered by May-May`s mommy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was 22 and I had met someone that meant a lot to me . My family has a big cookout every labor day weekend and the whole family is there and everyone brings friends also . Its a huge get together . I waited until everyone was seated and began to eat so things were quiet. I stood up and said loudly I have an announcement , I am gay and this is my partner , He stood up beside me . Evey one got very quiet , my dad stood up and put his arm around me and said this is my son and I love him , My mother stood up and kissed us . Everyone clapped and things went on as usual . After we ate my cousins and aunts and uncles came up to me and hugged us and said we love you . I suppose I am very lucky My family has always been very supportive .
2006-06-12 09:36:31 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I came out at age of 21, but only for my mom and her reaction descouraged me from telling anyone else. she isn't tolerating my relationship and what's more made me to leave the girl,whoch I haven't done in the end,but she doesn't know anything about it. no-one knows except here and I don't feel very well with it. I regret that I told my mom,because because of that she broke my opinion about her, she broke what I believed in for many years. now situation is very tough... :(
2006-06-12 09:43:46 · answer #10 · answered by bara_no_seido 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I came out at 19 to family 20 to friends - family was okay but dad wanted to kick me - he told me - my friends were all okay with it and were quite shocked because I am not that gay of a person
2006-06-12 03:28:04 · answer #11 · answered by Patches 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋