17 years old and all i want more than anything is to be married and have kids......i just want my OWn life, my OWN family.....i hate depending on others. My true ambition is just having my own family.......ive tried doing the whole teenage thing.......partying, "hanging" w/ friends my age......it just doesnt do it for me....all of my friends are married and have families......they hate it but thats what i want.........am i normal????Anyone else like me?
Advice would be greatly appreicated~
Thanks~
Additional Details
1 second ago
ok everyone........i didnt say that i wanted to have kids now......no im not an idiot.............i was just wondering if it was normal to feel like this at this age
by the way my friends arent my age and they DO have an education
TY!
I am asking this question again apparently some ppl were confused(not blaming yall) & RUDE!
i am planing on getting an education and going to college also BEFORE i ever start a family~im not selfish....
2006-06-11 17:15:53 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Wow! I guess people are really harsh! I don't think that its unusual at all! Your nurturing instinct is just kicking in!!! I felt a lot like that too, and had my son at 20, although I didn't do it in the order in which I had imagined (finish school, establish a career, get married, then have kids). I am not all that into astrology but you sound just like a cancer! (Like me!!!) But it seems like you have your priorities in order, and carrying them out will help you learn even more about yourself, what you want in a mate, how and where you want to raise your family, and all of that! I would just advise make sure you are where you want to be financially before you have your kids, and make sure you are ready to devote all that time into putting someone else first! I wish you all the best, in your schooling, career and with your future family.
2006-06-11 17:22:57 · answer #1 · answered by mzstorm 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like your looking more for a relationship than an actual marriage at this time. However, I support you on wanting to get married and have a family, I wanted the same at your age, but I did get stupid and end up having the baby first. I finished high school and tried to keep going, but couldn't. No babysitter and the father didn't feel the need to help much. Marriage wasn't what I expect because we were both too young and didn't have the skills yet to work out our problems. So waiting a little while till the guys in your age rang are little more mature may make better since.
2006-06-11 17:23:58 · answer #2 · answered by Tonya M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When I was about 15 my stepmother asked me what I wanted to do when I grew up. I said I want to be a wife and a mother. She laughed and said why would you want to do something stupid like that. Get your education, get a college degree and a good job so you don't ever have to depend on a man. My stepmother is only 10 years older than me btw and 10 years younger than my dad. She is now 41 years old and is finishing her Masters degree to be a nurse practicioner. She is fat, ugly, in a loveless marriage with a drunk that spends all her money and no kids of her own. I on the other hand have no college degree but have an amazing husband, two children who are unbelievably wonderful and a job that I absolutely LOVE. And a pretty good figure to boot! So somehow it seems that I got the life that she always wanted and all she got was her degree. Don't let anyone make you feel bad for wanting to be married and have kids. That's your dream, so it's not theirs big deal. You know what you want and what will make you happy go for it.
2006-06-11 17:40:36 · answer #3 · answered by crazytater 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I did want to get marry at age 16 and i did, i thought i would be happy because i would be with my husband and away from other people i hate, but when i got marry, everything went wrong. He didn't want to stay home with me, he went out to his friends house all the time without me, he slept over guys house and never even bother to call me, he would go out all night long till 4 in the morning, he was always drinking and smoking, he got pregnant and never even helped me with the kids, and he would never want to do anything with the couples, because he didn't want to take me out. Isn't my life so sad,plus, i never graduated, i don't have a job, i have no family close by, i don't have my own car, i can never have any time to my self, i have no friends, and i'm about to hit rock bottom because of all these annoying stupid people around me that i hate so much. But, i hope your life turns out better. By the way, i do love my husband alot when he is around, and he is the nicest husband anyone can ask for if only he'd listen to me more and not other people,
2006-06-11 17:44:57 · answer #4 · answered by lola 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you chose to do is exactly that- YOUR choice, not anyone else's. I have a friend who is 20, has a baby and is getting married in the fall...she is very happy- all of this happened right after high school. I can relate to your feelings. I always felt old for my age- I looked forward to having kids and getting married (in the reverse order of what I typed ;) ). I didn't wind up getting married until I was 32, and have yet to have kids...
2006-06-11 17:21:06 · answer #5 · answered by Mrs.Foster 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Having a family is so much more work and expense than you could ever imagine. ....Fast forward to the future...you finish school, get married and have a couple of kids. Your boss wants you to work over time, your kids want you home, your laundry is piling up, your dishes aren't done, supper needs to be made, but first you have to run out and get groceries, then one of the kids gets sick and you have to spend all night at emergency, and then get up at 6 a.m. to get ready for work. Your kid doesn't want you to go to work because he is sick, your boss yells at you for being 5 minutes late....Sounds like fun, Hey?? By the way...where does your life fit into this...I don't think you will have your own life for another 20 years. Ooops, make that 25 years, you have to keep working to pay for the kids college funds, and then their weddings. Oh Oh...it doesn't stop here...now you have the grandkids to babysit....Finished? Nope! Now your parents are old and you have to look after them! Have a nice life!!!
2006-06-11 17:47:24 · answer #6 · answered by NightHowler 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it is not weird to think like that.Especially when your friends are older than you.As long as you do not act on those feelings you'll be fine.Get that education first then when you have completed that then see if you still feel the same way.Good luck.If you do you may want to rethink it again.You are still young,there should be no rush to have children.You said yourself that they are not happy with there decision.That's probably because whatever they went to school for never got completed and now they regret there decision.Concentrate on going to school not on having a husband and kids.You'll find that life has a lot more to offer and you have a lot more to give to your life than that right now.
2006-06-11 17:27:09 · answer #7 · answered by Willnotlietoyou 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am like that I feel like high school is not doing anything for me and that I should just be allowed to go to college. All you need from your classes for real life you learn in grammer school (1-8th grade) But I have to stick to it. I am trying to act more mature and start a career. I am into the culinary arts so I started cooking and I love it so I am just getting a head start. Im probably boring you but just try to get a head start get a nice boyfriend and go out with him and in a couple of years you should be good and marrying will be easier and more accpeted by you and others.
2006-06-11 17:24:25 · answer #8 · answered by LameSkull 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing at all wrong with this. It's a great dream. What needs to be in the dream is the right mate. Someone who will love you unconditionally. Someone that you will love unconditionally. That unconditional love part gets in the way with a lot of marriages. You must be absolutely sure you are both committed to this before you can move into marriage and family.
2006-06-11 17:21:20 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes that's normal, it just depends on what you want and sounds like you want that now. But you might not want the same things when you are all grown up and have a good career going for you. But sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders just keep it up. Don't stress it so much your only 17 you wont think the same when you are 23 trust me. I have been there same thing. Hope that helps you.
2006-06-11 17:21:08 · answer #10 · answered by muneca 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋