If your parents were to say that your fiance (whome you live with) is not welcome at their house simply because she didn't obey their orders and controlling, what would you do?
A) Tell your parents that if your fiance isn't welcome, you arent neither
B) Continue going to visit them (of course, without your fiance)
C) Break up with your fiance to make your parents happy
Thank you!!!
2006-06-11 16:51:58 · 11 answers · asked by Itsme... 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well, my fiance chose B. When he does goes to visit them it puts me into a very ackward position. I start to think that they will bad mouth me or even try to fill up his ear with lies, which they've done many times. My MIL said many lies about me in the past, on top of that is a very controlling woman. I am in a position now where I am trying to figure out if he really loves me enough. If that was me, I would definately choose A, but he didnt. And its really frasturating.
I totally feel not loved and like a #2 in his life.
2006-06-11 17:19:53 · update #1
continue to visit them. the only way to help the situation is to keep lines of communication open with both sides. ur grown so u should be able to make your own choices, but then again your parents are there for you FOR LIFE and in the end only have your best interest @ heart. don't write them out of your life because u will regret it if u do. just continue to let them know how u feel and ask what can be done to make things better. it is also for your fiance to do what it takes to make the situation work. if she loves u then she would want your happiness, and that might mean learning to compromise.
U R # 2 in his life and that's how u should be. but that doesn't mean he doesn't love u. there is room in his heart for all! you'll understand when u have children. don't make him choose between u or his parents, because if he chooses u and it doens't work out then, he will have a rotten relationship with his parents FOR NOTHING. part of melting into someone elses family is knowing what to do, when to do it, how to do it, and when to just STAND! right now it is time for u top just STAND. show that youre good wife material by reaching out to your ML. to find some kind of common ground. u don't have to be best friends with her, but u will have to get along on some level if u want your future with the man u love to get better. remember, she will be the grandmother of your children.
2006-06-11 17:21:21 · answer #1 · answered by sickntyred 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am not a man, but I would like to answer this question. Your fiance must have done something that was very unacceptable. It must have been just awful. If not, then your parents are wrong. They should let her know they are not happy about what she did and move on. They are putting you in a position where you have to choose between them or her. If you truly love her and can except what she did then they are booking a loser. It is hard when your family and your soon to be family have issues. It will hurt you more than them.If you decide to stay away from mom and dad I wonder how they will feel when they can't see their grandchildren. Pick A and good luck.
2006-06-12 00:18:35 · answer #2 · answered by Flamingo 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
B) Continue to visit them without fiance. Find a perfect time to telling them that you are really love this girl.
2006-06-11 23:58:03 · answer #3 · answered by THINKMAAN 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pick "A", but leave the door open to future talks and visits. You should know your fiance better then they do and must start living your life.
2006-06-12 00:14:11 · answer #4 · answered by psycmikev 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I'm not a man, but I have the same problem. I told my parents that if they didn't like my fiance then they didn't have to see him, but that meant that they wouldn't see me either. I also told them that they would not be allowed to see their grandhchildren if we have any. They backed off a little. They still don't like him, but they tolerate him.
2006-06-11 23:56:10 · answer #5 · answered by Paige M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definitely A. Its not fair for parents to try to put you in a position to choose.
2006-06-12 00:16:44 · answer #6 · answered by boomerang3que 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A. been there done that. at 17 mom said stop seeing her or get out. was gone in 15 min. but things didnt work out 7 yrs and 2 kids later we divorced. mom was right.
2006-06-11 23:56:59 · answer #7 · answered by steadycobra 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I reported you for not following the rules.
2006-06-11 23:54:28 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
my parents ran into that problem with my fathers parents and if i were you i would go with A.
2006-06-12 05:18:16 · answer #9 · answered by draco_401 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'll continue visiting them...n i believe, one day, they will respect my choice!
2006-06-11 23:56:15 · answer #10 · answered by idiotguidebook 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋