Ok, 8 weeks ago my BF of 4.5 years broke up with me because he didn't want to be in a relationship right now, needed to figure out what he wanted out of life, etc... He said he still loved me, and I believe him.
At first I kept trying to get him to change his mind, then one day i decided I was going to give him his space. I gave him 4 weeks of space until last Wednesday when I called him...
He sounded really happy to hear from me and said he was glad I called because he had wanted to call me but was afraid that I hated him. We had a nice talk, just chit chat. We didn't talk about relationship stuff.
I then invited him over this week to just hang out and he said he would think about it. I told him that I wouldn't try anything, but he said he wasn't worried about me he was worried about himself (for those of you who don't know he was talking about sex). He hasn't got back to me about the hanging out thing yet.
But my dilemma is this. Do I follow my head which says to forget
2006-06-11 16:18:37 · 19 answers · asked by okieangel03 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
about him and move on with my life, or do I follow my heart which says to just be his friend and be there for him and maybe one day we'll get back together?
We are young. He is 22, I'm 21. I understand completely why he broke up with me and I believe it was the best thing for us.
I love him very much, probably more so now then I did when we were together. You know what they say, absence makes the heart grow fonder....
Opinions please...
2006-06-11 16:20:23 · update #1
Well, first of all I think that you should follow your heart but being friends can develop whatever it is that you had in a relationship. Sometimes they are right when they say if you love something so much you have to let it go but if it was meant to be it will come right back and this is one of those instances. So be patient and be a good Friend and you never know but don't put all your eggs in one basket, meaning if it's not meant to be , be prepared to move on and you should anyway. He is young and he want to be single for a while and I must say I have to respect him because he could have done what the typical man do and cheat.
2006-06-11 16:28:14 · answer #1 · answered by reeseusps 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I would follow your heart. Yeah right now he doesn't want to have a relation ship but he still has feelings for you so later on when he wants a relationship...he will still have fellings for you. Plus everyone need a friend...once he can tell that you are there to be his friend he will relize that he wants to be with you becasue you waited for you. It may take him a while but you still should give him some time to think about what he wants.
If you followed your heart everytime something like this happend...life would be really painful.
2006-06-11 23:43:26 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you relationship was good the first time around i would say follow your heart but if it was bad then follow your head .... like if he cheated on you or abused you or anything like that then follow your head but if none of those things happened then follow your heart and like the person up above said if ya do follow your heart just make sure you take your head with you i wish you all the luck in the choice you make .....
2006-06-11 23:29:35 · answer #3 · answered by sweetcharity2007 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love this guy unconditionally, I think that you should give him his space. I would date others and if you are both right for each other you will find your way back to each other. Let you heart be the vehicle to take you there, but let your head do the driving.
2006-06-11 23:32:52 · answer #4 · answered by radioscope 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should follow your head on this one. You're both very young, and it sounds like he's trying to get some sex out of you while he still can. Stay away from him until you're properly healed.
2006-06-11 23:22:49 · answer #5 · answered by cjsmommy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to talk to your bf and tell him how you feel. Giving him time and space to figure things out is generous of you. There is no reason he can't figure out his future with a supportive partner. I don't see why he needed to "break up" with you and not contact you or see you in order to try to figure his future out.
If I was you I would tell him that its a bit selfish and unfair to "kind of" break up with you and then not talk to you or even want to hang out with you. He needs to make a choice - and like I said there is no reason he shouldn't be able to figure things out with you especially if you are going to be a part of his future.
You don't deserve to wait on the sidelines until he gets his act together. Talk to him and try to work things out or just tell him that you are going to move on - if he can't figure things out with you as part of his future then he doesn't deserve you.
2006-06-11 23:23:04 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree, your heart may be right here, but you're still going to need that head there to keep you going. I truly wish you the best
2006-06-11 23:23:30 · answer #7 · answered by colorist 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think u should follow your heart but at the same time to follow ur head.ok be careful
2006-06-11 23:34:40 · answer #8 · answered by azucena_lemus2006 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think in this case following your head is wise. It will help protect your heart.
2006-06-11 23:21:37 · answer #9 · answered by MattEMatt 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say follow ur heart cuz good luv is hard to find
2006-06-11 23:21:48 · answer #10 · answered by Anita 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋