2006-06-11 04:00:43 · 28 answers · asked by sweet 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
do what you feel you want to do, but to ask you to have his child but not want to marry you is wrong. if he loves you enough to have a child together then he should make that committment and marry you.
2006-06-11 04:04:11 · answer #1 · answered by vanessaoz 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask him to make himself clear. If he is saying he does not want to get married and still wants you to have his child, tell him to leave. Honestly, that sounds like you have a child already: him!
A baby needs a family. Families are two parents. It is hard enough raising a child with two parents and no aunts/uncles/grandparents, but without the other partner!
Seriously, this can be him showing you his true colors. No woman should give in to this. I see it all the time and I feel so sad.
I am a man. I am the father to two daughters. Be strong for the woman you are and the life you could be carrying someday with the right man.
2006-06-11 04:14:27 · answer #2 · answered by NeoArt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you realize that you will end up raising the child yourself? Are you so financially secure that you can do that. I am always surprised that women do not value themselves more. Forget about all your support. YOU will have the sleepless nights, sick days, constant care. Never do anything that someone else wants you to do! repeat! You are the one looking at 18 years of care because what ever he says now he will be gone--even with marriage (but you have a better chance) If you can afford to have a child, want a child you could consider it but in my opion you have only one choice, NO!
2006-06-11 04:20:24 · answer #3 · answered by emass6 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Come right out and ask him if he wants to get married.
Ditch him if he doesn't want the commitment. Find a 'real' man that's willing to commit to you.
It makes no sense to me why he would want to have kids with you but not marry you. Kids are much more of a commitment than marriage is, for the simple reason that in a childs eye parents are God. So this man is going to affect every aspect of their lives from the day they are born to the day they die. *example; Women choose spouses like their father. If he's a crappy dad then your kids are going to be screwed up.
Good Luck!
2006-06-11 04:04:42 · answer #4 · answered by Corn_Flake 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Having a baby out of marriage hurts the mother and the baby. If he did not ask you to marry him first, then do not have a baby with him and I would move on. Raising a child with two parents and two incomes is difficult enough, one is next to impossible and you end up settling for less then you and your baby deserve.
2006-06-11 04:10:14 · answer #5 · answered by keleyeve 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he's saying you are good enough to go through the motions with but not to marry. I would not get pregnant by this guy. Just because you have been together for eight years doesn't mean he is "the one". God may have a different plan. Good Luck!
2006-06-11 04:05:03 · answer #6 · answered by Power To The People 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He loves you soo much that he wants to knock you up so you can have his child but he doesn't want to put a ring on your finger and give you his last name?
I can understand why you feel sad. I would be mad as hell as well. Obviously he's proving to you that marriage isn't something he's interested in. Obviously it IS something you are interested in. You have two choices: stay with him and remain unmarried or leave, take time to heal and find someone who loves you enough to make that committment.
2006-06-11 04:04:01 · answer #7 · answered by adagia27 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In most States 8 years is considered common law marriage. So look into your laws in your State. Also if he isn't mature enough to devote to a marriage and take the vow,,then is is NOT MATURE enough to RAISE NO CHILD. Allot of men do this , so your stuck, and he can walk anytime away. Again most States are stopping this, making it harder for them to just walk. My advice is ,,,no don't do it. He don't sound MATURE ENOUGH, or isn't taking the 8 years together seriously enough. Take care and please think hard about bring another child in this world.
2006-06-11 04:14:38 · answer #8 · answered by Brat-tett & Brat Pack's 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So? If you want to marry him, tell him. If he says no, and you feel sick of him, just let him go. You deserve better. 8 years mean nothing if compare to a life time misery and waiting.
^_^ Good luck though and cheer up! Life is not so bad. Just remember all the people who always love you, your family and friends and all the good things even happen in your life. :D
2006-06-11 04:04:38 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think if you are good enough to be the mother of his children then you should be good enough to be his wife.
Don't accept to have his child before getting married, and if he's not thinking of marrying you, go on with your life.
It won't be easy but I think it will be the right thing to do. Don't waste any more time with him, he doesn't deserve that.
2006-06-11 04:08:50 · answer #10 · answered by ann-me 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋