What should i do?

Question

my friendships usually go like this:ifind the "perfect" person to hang out with-they get close to me-they use me- i realize what they are doing and dump them-they point out my wrong doings and leave me in their dust-i m all alone-i hate it and try to find a new friend---BUT THEN IT HAPPENS ALL OVER AGAIN!!!
i m in the same situation right now and have 4 options......1 to pull out of the friendship and only focus on school and my hobbies-all by myself.......2 let someone else get close to me and probably get used again.......3 just stick with the friend i have even though shes using me (cuz she hasnt caught on that i realize shes using me so shes still nice).........4 let all my friends go and shut myself out from the whole world so i cant be used

oh and here is some other info -i have a problem with being assertive- i kind of cut myself from groups already-and i dont want to get hurt again

Answer 1

Honey child, you need to get in touch with your inner b**ch! She's waiting on you to discover her. There is no reason for you to keep on getting used, understand? Do you realize that you are sending out vibes that say, "Use me, hurt me, I'm a doormat!"?

You need to learn to send out the vibes that say, "F**k with me and you'll be wearing your n*ts for a necktie."

You can do it, I promise.

Answer 2

I think you have a pretty good idea about letting someone make friends with you. You said you would probably get used again but that may not be the case. You must be learning something about making friends and how to choose better with all your experienced being used.

Find a couple of people who are good friends and make friends with them. You need to take a step up in quality of friends. Write down what you look for in a friend and when you start a new friendship check to see if your list holds up.

Answer 3

Step back and take it a little slower -- if the issue that starts the problem is that you give people too much leaway -- then you don't want to permit that. How are they using you? Create a plan for yourself, that when you see certain behaviors, you will just say 'no' to them. Sometimes when we are loners, we let people become friends too quickly, rather than carefully choosing them. And, with all the demands of school, socializing can suffer sometimes. Take it slow.

Answer 4

Well people are like that they get what they can. Don't let them use you get a book on assertiveness but how to do it politely; and peope only walk all over you like that because you let them. Let they know that they can't. This has a little bit to do with the way you present yourself so walk tall and speak like you mean everything you say. Plus drop your "friends".

Answer 5

Ok, if you are projecting a "doormat" kind of personality then you are going to attract people who want to push you around. They have control issues and seek people like you to use and abuse.

Try looking other places for friends.
Suggestion: maybe try volunteering somewhere --you're more likely to meet people who are compassionate and not domineering.

Answer 6

well just throw ur friends out of your life and go find new and good friends start your new life from the beginning and also be little bit yourself think of yourself ,dont let anyone cheat you.

Answer 7

NO!! trust me, whatever you do, dont cut yourself off from others!!, it will end in more pain than you can imagine. just be careful with yourself, try to find good friends, and for your sake, dont isolate yourself, you will just be putting yourself into a never ending hell

Answer 8

Tell the friend that you know that she is using you and that you want to be her friend, but that she can't keep doing what she is doing.

Answer 9

next time you feel this way.....goto the hardware store and buy a rope

Answer 10

kick ur frnds butt and get her out of ur life