Friendship Problem?

Question

Hello everyone,

I need your help. I had this wonderful friendship with this girl and last year i initiated a conversation that led to the end of our friendship which was a result of my rude attitude. Probably the worse thing that happened to me in a long time. Its a year later,
and i decide to call her back because i want bring closure to the situation and possibly string together my friendship with her again.
I did call her but she did not pick up. i think she really hates me. What kind of message should i leave that she would respond to?

Thanks,

Answer 1

There are consequences to our behavior. Learn from this experience.

You might try sending her flowers with an apology. It couldn't hurt.

Answer 2

She has hypoglycemia. She has mood swings. Those people are unforgiving. If you call her every minute and leave a message you will eventually hit when she is in a good mood. She will answer and act as though nothing ever happened and ask where you have been. She was in a trance. If you get her to talk and get back with her it will start all over again.
There is a good chance that she has another boy friend and she uses her moods to get rid of you for a while.
Then she bounces back.
All she wants is for someone to love her and understand that she is not going to be exclusive to you. If you can handle that go for it.
Some friend or female relative has told her she is beautiful and why shouldn't she have more than on boy friend. She goes for that because she cannot make a decision on her own.

Answer 3

No. 1: Confess. Write her a letter, (not an email or voicemail or computer typed page) telling her that now you are more mature and realize you did her wrong. Tell her that you do not know if she still wants to be friends, but you did want her to know it was not her fault, it was yours.
At last, say if she is ever willing to have you back in her life, please contact you, and give her your contact info. Explain again that she was a true friend, and you are sorry you let her down.
Then sit back and wait. If she ever contacts you, make a special effort to listen to her every word, and read between the lines. She might only call to say she forgives you, but she doesn't want to know you anymore. If so, BE COOL!
Tell her that you will always have good thoughts about your time together, and you are glad it ended on good terms. You never know but there might be loads of time for the two of you in latter years. I hope everything works out well.

Answer 4

You should say "Hi it's ______. I know it has been a while, I was just wondering how you were doing and I wanted to say that I'm sorry about what I said a year ago. I'm not trying to be selfish, but i need so closure to that situation. Hopefully we can talk about it and maybe patch up the great friendship we once had. My number is _______ give me a call and maybe we could get together some time. Bye"

Answer 5

if she will not pick up the phone, I would send her a letter. Then you can get all your feelings out to her. I would suggest email but she could just have you blocked or delete it. I think if this was a one time thing and you said something rude then she would probally forgive you if you didn't act that way all the time. If you always act rude, she may just be fed up with it and not want to be around someone that brings her down. I would just write out everything in a letter and tell her how you feel and if nothing comes of it, at least you know you tried and it will make you feel better to get it all out off your chest. Good Luck.

Answer 6

The best thing of course is to tell her in person or if she answers the phone. But if you need to resort to leaving a message you could leave one and say, "Hi, it's ____. I realize that I should have called you much earlier about this, but I want to apologize for the thing I said that offended you so much last year. I am truly sorry for what I did, and I hope you accept my apologies. I was wrong."

The truth is a year may be a little too late, but then it may not. I have had arguments with people and not spoken to them for 10 years, but the moment we saw each other and talked about it, our friendship was resumed. I even had a guy from h.s. find me on Classmates.com and apologize for something he apparently said to me when I was 15, and that was 35 years ago.I hadn't a clue what he was talking about, but I accepted it anyway.

So give it a shot, but be prepared she may not accept it.

Answer 7

What did you do? Tell her you wanted to be "with her?"

More than likely you were not such wonderful friends. Either that or you did something horrid. Otherwise, you'd have been forgiven a long time ago.

Is this the first time since the friendship ended you have tried to call? Have you apologized before?

Answer 8

I'd try calling again. With your one phone call, she knows you're trying to make contact, but she could still be upset. If you are persistent in your phone calls, you might be able to give her the message that you are really sincere in wanting to be friends with her again. I wouldn't call every day, since you don't want to be considered as a harasser. Try calling once a week, leaving a message. Do it for a while. This might soften her attitude enough so that you can actually get to talk to her to apologize or explain. I hope you're able to get through to her. Good luck!

Answer 9

take it from somebody who went through the same thing my friend, I have tried talking to her and it has just never worked out the way I planned. It has been just over two years now and I have had about a 10 second chat with her over those years. The only reason is that I live about two minutes from her and we are bound to see eachother throughout the town. I really don't think there is much for you to do. Maybe she will get over it someday and maybe she wont. But take it from me, it's hard to just move on, but you need to.

Answer 10

Sadly enough, my friend, there is very little that you can do. See, if she was a guy, then it would be easy. You could do next to nothing to restore a relationship with a guy friend that has gone sour. Once a girl has made up their mind to be resentful or anything like that, they usually stick with it. My advice would be to just let it go. Apparently she isn't a good enough friend if she is not trying to restore the relationship with you. And if she isn't looking for reconcilliation, then run for the hills, count your losses (or blessings), and be glad that you discovered how true, or untrue, she really was.

Answer 11

All you can do is apologize and open up the door for the two of you to talk...if she wants to talk there maybe a possibility of mending the friendship, but always remember that every friendship does not necessarily last forever.