My husband and I were at a party last night and he ended up crashing out just after midnight.. I stayed up around the fire with all the rest as were drinking up a storm. My boyfriend and I have been having relationship problems in the past and myself and a couple of guys stayed up till the birds came out talking about it, they really helped me. The problem is I we ended up in our camper trailer as it started to rain and then I ended up on my knees in front of them both.
Is this cheating as I never took off my clothes ? + what should I do if my husband gets suspicious and asks anything as we have been married form 18 years and we both want to continue to get through this roug time.
S
2006-06-10 12:28:47 · 20 answers · asked by sandra curious 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well I'm confused about a couple of things. Is he your husband of 18 years or your boyfriend or is the boyfriend someone else other than the other two guys you were unfaithful to your significant other with. YES of course you cheated. You engaged in a sexual act with not just one but two other men.
Alcohol is no excuse for a lack of self control. You may not remember in the morning( though you did) but you certainly know what you are doing at the time it's happening know matter how intoxicated you are. Where exactly did your husband or whatever he is crash out? Was he in the camper van also.? My Gosh what were you thinking? I'm trying not to be judgmental here, because I hate that and it serves no purpose but heavens above, I can't find a reason to condone infidelity. 18years is a lot to throw away, you should have thought about that before you cheated. I would not want to stay with a person that was unfaithful. If your man does find out the responsibility is yours and yours alone.
2006-06-10 12:51:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You know the answer to this. You will not feel any better if any of us were to say that is was not cheating. It doesn't matter that you never took your clothes off. Any kind of sex is sex and any kind of sex outside of your marriage is cheating. You referred to him as your husband and then you said you and your boyfriend have been having problems? Are you guys legally married or common law? I was just wandering that because if he were to find this out he could put you through hell in divorce court. Anyway, If you truly want to make it through this rough time you guys are having just don't do this again. Your conscious is going to reek havoc on you. I can tell it already is. When you put alcohol into the scenario when 2 people are going through a bad time it is sometimes easy to make mistakes and do things you will regret and also things you would not ordinarily do. If he gets suspicious you have 2 options: tell him the truth or DENY, DENY, DENY. You could always fake a blackout and say you do not remember, but that is wrong, I can't believe I even suggested it, but it is an option if you don't want to face the consequences of him knowing the truth. The right thing to do would be come clean, get it off your chest, deal with it and move forward.
2006-06-10 19:44:57 · answer #2 · answered by whatshername 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your question was confusing as you said boyfriend and husband but the end answer is the same. Let me ask you a question? Has this happened before? If this is an on-going problem you need to tell your husband (he deserves your honestly for an ongoing problem) as see if he is willing to help you work though this.
If this is a one time thing, I would seek out professional help to figure out why this is happening now before confessing anytihing. I would also ban camping trips like this in the future.
A general observation is you lack self esteem. Maybe you need to work on that. Ending up on your knees in front of two other men seems like you are acting out some self esteem issues. I'm sure it was exciting but if it made you break your marital vows, what is going on in your head that allowed that to happen. Maybe focus on that and figure out why that happened if you truly want to keep your marraige and a positive self image in tact.
Good luck and try to see the good things about you and respect yourself more in the future. Good luck.
2006-06-10 19:38:17 · answer #3 · answered by jimanywhere 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are kidding, aren't you..this is a joke, right? giving BJ's and you think you are faithful to your husband...this beat all I have read, even here, and that takes some doing. I am very glad you are not my wife. All your excuses above don't amount to a hill of beans. Good luck at your lawyer's office. IF you think your husband won't hear about this one, you are as nuts as you sound. Rough time??? Sound as if you make things a rock ride on a motor scooter. And you want to pass this off as nothing! This is a Jerry Springer episode, isn't it...yep, must be a joke. And in a trailer! Talk about trailer trash! This is too funny.
2006-06-10 19:46:13 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you kidding me you went down on two guys that were NOT your husband. YOU CHEATED !!! the sad thing is now your friends will probally think your a slu* thats how those things work out... I feel so sorry for your Husband or boyfriend ?? which ever he is...first you said husband then you said boyfriend ???
2006-06-10 19:35:48 · answer #5 · answered by budzgrl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't have to even leave the house to cheat. Now a days you can cyber with anyone. I found my husband online and talking on the cell phone with a girl.
2006-06-11 01:43:28 · answer #6 · answered by Melissa F 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you kidding? Of course it's cheating! And don't try to get justification by still having your clothes on. With any luck, your husband will find out and leave your trashy a**......alcohol is nothing to blame infidelity on. Guess you should have thought twice before you said those vows........
2006-06-10 20:01:29 · answer #7 · answered by bluez 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all gross!!!!!! are you kidding ? what if the situation was reversed and your husband or boyfriend which ever he may be went down on 2 ladies !!!! would you call that cheating ? huh?
and you say you been married 18 years so you have to be up in age get freaking real lady grow the hell up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-06-10 19:41:24 · answer #8 · answered by angie_graves123 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't have to take your clothes off to cheat. If you were on your knees in front of both of them.....ummmm......yeah, sounds like cheating to me. Think about this.....your husband was with 2 girls....they were naked but he wasn't. Would he have cheated?
2006-06-10 19:33:48 · answer #9 · answered by fungirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well yea that's definitely cheating...?? how could you even have to ask that? And you have a boyfriend, on top of your husband, and you were cheating on both of them...???? I think you should seek some professional help.
2006-06-10 19:33:28 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋