If cats always land on their feet, and toast always lands butter-side down, what happens if you glue toast to?

Question

a cat, and throw it out of a window? How does it land?

Answer 1

My dear sir, you have invented the first antigravity aerofoil cat in history. It will never land because 'cats always fall on their feet' so it cannot land on it's side, bottom, head or back. Likewise the toast will resist falling butter side up and since it is glued to the cat's feet (with the butter towards the cat) it will keep the whole shenanigans up in the air.

But I do spot a flaw. While this pair are floating round the earth seemingly for ever, the cat, stricken by pangs of hunger, will lick the toast clean of butter. In this confabularium of toast and cat, the toast will now have no butter side. As is well-known, toast with no butter will fall any which way (and usually down behind the fridge or in a handy cup of tea), so the cat-a-toast will come to earth as the last bit of butter disappears into the cat's maw.

At this point another immutable rule comes into play. This states that if you butter a cat's paws, she will lick the butter off them and will from then on always come home. By deduction it has to be said that it is not until the butter is inside the cat that this reaction takes place, so it matters not that the butter did not actually come from the paw, but adjacent thereto.

If I were you, mate, I would look behind the fridge to see what the strange noise is.

Answer 2

Couple of scenarios here -

1. Pigeons are attracted by the toast, they begin to eat it, cat lands on its feet, no toast to land.

2. Cat and toast land on their side and begin spinning like a coin, for all eternity.

3. Cat licks glue off, toast and cat land seperately, butter-side down and paws on the ground.

4. Chaos theory kicks in - a giant mutated spleen eats both entities but is then ruptured by the pigeons (see above).

5. I can't do this anymore.

6. There is no 6.

7. Who cares?

8. See 7.

Answer 3

Well, the answer is probably a mixture of two rules
1) a cat is more likely to land on its feet(therefore butter-side up) when dropped from around 5-7 floors up, lower and the cat hasnt time to turn round to land on its feet,higher and bones break easier(making it difficult to tell what way up the cat is and making it difficult to distinguish cat from toast).
2)always butter your toast sitting down !.

Answer 4

The cat will land on it's feet, dislodging the toast which will then fall butter side down

Answer 5

If cats always land on their feet and tost always lands butter side up put the tost butter side down and the cat will flip over and then land on his back and then if you did it again it would be the cat's turn to land on his feet and the tost would land butter side down.

Answer 6

THIS QUESTION IS SO FUNNY I HAD TO ANSWER IT. THEY SAY CATS ALWAYS LAND ON THERE FEET BUT THIS IS UNTRUE AS I AM A CAT LOVER IVE SEEN CATS FALL AND LAND ON THERE HEAD,BACK,BOTTEM ETC. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO GLUE THE TOAST OR THE CAT?

Answer 7

You get a slice of toast with cat paste

Answer 8

I would prefer to nail the toast to the cat

Answer 9

It would land YOU in jail. If I knew that someone threw a cat out of a window, I would call animal welfare.

Answer 10

i think that it would make the cat unbalanced, which then making the cat turn, to the cat and the toast would hit the ground at the same time...lol