I have been married for two years. My husband says he is just joking, but, every day all day he accuses me of sleeping with someone else. I work a full time job outside the home, he is on disability through the military for PTSD.
The stress that he is putting me through is ruining our marriage. He continues to start up arguments over everything and anything. He takes the advice of his best friend over what I tell him. He continues to think that every one is out to hurt him and take him for everything and anything he has. (he doesn't have anything, because he doesn''t have money)
Doctors have him on medication, but, he won't take it, when he does take it, he takes much more than what he should. There was one time where he took one weeks dosage in 3 hours!
Please can someone give me advice at what I should do? I am not sure that I love him the way I once did anymore. I am not seeing anyone else, I take my wedding vows seriously! He scares me with words and threats!
2006-06-10 01:08:42 · 16 answers · asked by navymilitarybrat76 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
PTSD is Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
2006-06-10 01:10:34 · update #1
Just to help clarify, I have gone to his psych doc with him, he refuses to let me talk when the doc asks me questions, he even slapped me once in front of the doc. He refuses to do anything, even help clean the house or mow the lawn because he doesn't want to get caught doing something to lose the $300 a month he gets from disability. I still love him, its just not the same. I am the only person he treats this badly, he treats his best friend like he is GOD, and I am just a slave to him in his eyes.
2006-06-10 01:21:37 · update #2
Any kids involved? If not then I would move on. Sounds like he doesn't want to help himself and you are putting up with abuse.
If you want to do something for him call his doctor from work and tell him what you told us. Ask him what you can do to get your hubby help. Maybe he will have some good advice. PTSD can be helped but it takes time and the sufferer has to want to get better.
Maybe if he learns he might lose you if he doesnt work on it he will try harder.
2006-06-10 02:27:58 · answer #1 · answered by Mache 6 · 4⤊ 2⤋
Sounds as though you have a relationship that has dissolved into domestic violence. I empathize with his PTSD but it is his responsibility to address this issue in an appropriate manner (drugs and manipulation are not the answer). You may consider going to a shelter and separating for a time in order to drive the point home that he needs to get real about getting help. Sounds like you may need a safe place to go and be supported.
2006-06-10 08:29:27 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He needs counseling...and a lot of it. He obviously has major trust issues, which could be an effect of PTSD or possibly he's cheating on you? A lot of times people feel guilty for doing things like that (as they should) and turn it around and accuse the other person. Good luck!
2006-06-10 08:22:46 · answer #3 · answered by bluez 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the fact that he doesn't take his meds like he should and that he is home while you are working is definitely not helping the situation. Maybe some type of counseling where you both can share how you feel? Maybe he can get involved in volunteering, something that will keep him occupied aside from being home alone?
2006-06-10 08:18:10 · answer #4 · answered by Kandela 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is insecure. And his insecurities will break your marriage. Counseling could be your only chance. If he doesn't agree, go by yourself. Money should be no problem as the military have this kind of help. If he doesn't want to be help( and he is the one who needs help) you'll have to consider all your options. Did you talked with your parents about your problem? It will be wonderful if you have their support.
2006-06-10 08:20:55 · answer #5 · answered by elgil 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He SLAPPED you??? Now, that was enough for me! Why are you still there? You should not put up with abuse! He is abusing you, both verbally and physically......you deserve NEITHER! You need to leave him, get counseling for the abuse, and move on with your life. Good Luck!
2006-06-10 08:43:53 · answer #6 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The reason he is accusing you ...joking or not. He has either done it in the past or he has thought about it. He seriously needs help.
2006-06-10 09:42:58 · answer #7 · answered by stenochica2005 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get counselling immediately! If he doesn't want to, you need to cut him loose. It's not worth your going through hell for a man who obviously feels too sorry for himself to want to get better.
2006-06-10 08:14:28 · answer #8 · answered by John D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He needs to be alone with his thoughts. He seriously has problems. I do think he needs counseling and you need a divorce
2006-06-10 08:12:39 · answer #9 · answered by nastaany1 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
poor bugger, he's still not over it.
he can trust only his "combat buddies"
either you just tolerate it
or you take a year or two off
go and live with your family until your man regains his senses.
2006-06-10 08:57:14 · answer #10 · answered by leadbelly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋