I was away on a holiday and when i got back to my room , i could see belongings of another lady.... he admitted there was someone but did not have sex with her.
2006-06-08 21:45:38 · 14 answers · asked by sunshine 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
wow, how was it before you left? Do you love this man enough to work on it and do what you need to do to grow stronger together? It seems chaotic right now but really sit down with each other and put all the cards on the table. Also follow your heart, not when you are mad but when you are calm and in abetter frame of mind. Good luck and god bless.
2006-06-08 22:18:00 · answer #1 · answered by D baby 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
He only told you he didn't have sex with her, because you didn't SEE it...he will only admit to what you caught him with, the "belongings"....so he will lie about the rest of the story. Had a lover many years ago do the same thing...I had a feeling I was being cheated on, went to his home, and kaboom.... another woman in the home. He said "it was a cousin"...such an awful lie! I dumped him, it was extremely difficult....took about 2 years to get over it....it sucks....but I hope you can find some comfort in knowing that KARMA does exist...."what goes around, comes around"! Good luck lady....my heart is with you!
2006-06-09 07:43:31 · answer #2 · answered by BabsinPA 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first I dont know all the facts to give you any precise advice, but I'll go off of what I do know.
Do you have what it takes to forgive him and forget meaning let the past be the past and work on the future?
DONT LEAVE HIM!!!!! I dont know what your vowels said but mine said "for better or worse". No I'm not excusing what he did and yes you should be angry.
But look at everything in the whole picture,
Why would he cheat?
Do I satisfy him emotional and sexually?
Were we going through problems?
Do we need counseling to work out some of these issues that led up to this?
Do I want to cheat on him? and not because he did it to you, but because he's not satisfy your emotional and sexual needs.
If he's willing to work on it, you should be open to work on it as well. One thing to keep in mind though when dealing with a man, they don't like to have repetitive conversation.
So to continue to bring up this issue over and over again and wanting to keep talking about it is only driving him right out the door.
But ultimately the decesion is yours. How strong is your love for him and this marriage to make it work, meaning doing all you can do in your power to keep it together. Once you know you have done that and it still doesn't work walk away, dont be anybody's doormat, after that you would deserve better.
2006-06-09 14:47:47 · answer #3 · answered by Queen P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course you know he is lying. I could see if he was honest with you about cheating, that you should forgive. However, he was not honest and that means that you just cannot trust him. Been there done it. Hurts like all get out, but I took it for a while and I did get out. Talk to clergy, counselor, or any professional who specializes in marital problems. Do not let him mentally abuse you to the point where you cannot make decisions for yourself.
2006-06-09 05:18:42 · answer #4 · answered by grannywinkie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So why were you on holiday without him? Were you cheating on him as well? He doesn't know whether you were or not. That being said, you did marry him and probably vowed to love him 'till death do us part'. So many people chose the easy option of leaving/divorce when they comeacross a problem in their marriage instead of working it out.
2006-06-09 04:57:59 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's a hard decision and one you will have to make for yourself. Write a list of the pro's and con's of staying with him, would you be able to forgive him and learn to trust him again? Does he want to make your marriage work? has he apologised and explained why some other woman's things were in your room?
2006-06-09 07:14:59 · answer #6 · answered by sparkleythings_4you 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have not heard all the story and I would guess you need to know. You need to talk to someone and then get him to go and get marriage counseling. He needs to fess up so you can decide how you want to continue with your life. It's about you....not him.He already brought trash to the marriage.
2006-06-09 07:29:53 · answer #7 · answered by folklore 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
honestly its your marrige girl, u got 2 follow your own heart. we aint walking in yo shoes.someone will tell u 2 leave him,and theyll be happy at home while u lonely,or they already misreable they love company
2006-06-09 04:50:19 · answer #8 · answered by noni 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Anyone who does not care enough to let someone into your house, have sex with them... does not care about you. He could have gave you a disease. He does not care. DUMP his azz.
2006-06-09 06:13:43 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's best you let him explain himself, but if it isn't feasable and sounds like BS then leave him, he's not worth the hassle!
2006-06-09 04:50:16 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋