Everytime he goes out of town he promises not to do it, but inevitably, after a few months he does it again. I am concerned about the choices that he may be making when he gets so drunk...ie I am not sure I can trust him. This has been going on for years.
2006-06-08 15:13:55 · 26 answers · asked by frogrtesting 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Thanks for all your feedback. We have been to counseling....he promised things would get better but they haven't. Our friends say there is no way he would cheat, but that there is some underlying issue that he is not willing to deal with, but I am sick of the mistrust. I am not sure what a marriage is without trust. We have kids and I am pregnant....I feel a little trapped. I don't believe in divorce, but I am starting to feel like we will be 80 and still struggling with this. I feel like I deserve better, but maybe no husband is perfect.
2006-06-08 17:10:09 · update #1
It's hard to tell because every man is different. I work with two men that do the same thing, their wives go crazy about it. When out of town and drunk, one is totally respectful and wouldn't even dream of doing something that would hurt his marraige, and well the other is not so well behaved. You just have to figure out what kind of guy you have and hope for the best. But it is possible that he just likes to drink with the boys and isn't interested in making stupid choices.
Good luck.
2006-06-08 15:18:31 · answer #1 · answered by Gabrielle 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the fact that he is promising you something and not following through is a big deal. does he always admit to it or do you find out about it someother way? it sounds like there could be a bigger problem here, maybe he has a bit of an alcohol problem or he feels like he has the need to keep things from you..who knows but you should get to the root of why it is happening. maybe a talk with a couples counseler could help the two of you out. good luck!
2006-06-08 15:17:00 · answer #2 · answered by Hez 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He has to support himself. I divorced my husband for the equal motive. He refused therapy, and located us in damage's method, to not point out the very unhealthy selections he made whilst consuming, reminiscent of permitting medicines in my residence. If he refuses therapy, you fairly don't have any option however divorce. Get your self into Al-Anon, discover a well attorney, and begin lawsuits. Make certain he most effective will get supervised visits as a result of his historical past of consuming and riding with the child within the automobile, or looking her whilst inebriated. If he cleans up his act, that may difference in long run. You must do what is satisfactory in your youngster and also you, and staying with him on this state is not it. Don't keep married in view that you cannot have enough money to not. That is not going to finish good for anybody worried.
2016-09-08 22:31:10 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, he shouldn't be lying about getting drunk. Does his traveling involve going to different locations each time--or the same place every time? If it's always the same place, I would be somewhat worried. Can you not accompany him on any of his trips?
At least it's not as bad as a friend's dad does: his wife doesn't want him smoking or drinking at home--so he keeps an apartment in another city (near work) and only comes home on weekends and holidays. She knows he drinks and smokes there, but doesn't seem to care--as long as he doesn't do it at home. Weird.
2006-06-08 15:21:10 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can be sure. Sure that if he is lying about this he is also lieing about other things. If you can not trust him but want to, I'd travel to his next location and stake him out, when he's drunk or starts the drinking you can confront him. This will also allow you to see what else he is doing because there is no doubt he's up to no good.
2006-06-08 15:19:32 · answer #5 · answered by annie red 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The 3 major reasons you should ever get divorced are: adultry, abuse and addictions. It sounds like it is time to hit the road. I hope you don't have kids......................if you do, go to Alanon and get some help. Don't be an enabler. The lying is the worst part. There is ALWAYS more to the story when someone lies.........believe me. I've been through it before.
2006-06-08 15:16:43 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is he an alcoholic? I don't understand why your husband would feel the need to promise he wouldn't drink when he's away if he wasn't one. But yeah, with drinking comes lots of bad things....if he's cheated before i wouldn't trust him now....
2006-06-08 15:19:55 · answer #7 · answered by bluez 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, but i wouldn't trust a drunk man. If he loves you he would not put y'all's relationship in jeoperdy by putting you in a situation where you don't know if you can trust him and himself in a situation where he may do something he would l8r regret.
P.S. maybe he can get a different job where he doesn't have to travel.
2006-06-08 15:18:09 · answer #8 · answered by lola 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi, I don't want to condemn anyone, but if I lied about this, I'd lie about the escort in the hotel room and about and about.
You see what I'm saying. If this is lied about, what else goes on?
2006-06-08 15:17:48 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you think he's cheating when he gets drunk? If so, I'd attempt to get to the bottom of it and find out if he is. You don't need him coming home and giving you any diseases.
2006-06-08 15:16:28 · answer #10 · answered by Kevin 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋