Love matter?

Question

ok.. the Deal is...I am 19 years old, girlfriend is 20 years old and we been living together in an apartment for 2 1/2 years now and been together for 3 1/2 years. Right now We are eachother's First-times... right now my gf keeps pushing bout getting married and possilbly kids ....and yet i want to meet other women(explore), and she doesn't....
i love her very much but i would perfer to meet and date other women to see what else is out there for me.
Any suggestions?

Answer 1

well you dont love her because if you want to "explore" then obviously you dont have a really strong feeling for her

Answer 2

I think it is a good idea for BOTH of you to explore. If you two have never had a serious relationship with anyone else but each other, how are you supposed to know if your love is strong enough to hold up to the test of time.

Everyone's personalities change after your mid twenties. By then, you might be a horrible match.

It is way too soon to get married. Your full emotional maturaty hasn't developed yet.

You can always get back together again, later, if you find out that you WERE perfect for each other, after all.

It happens all the time.
Most importantly, if you never experience other relationships NOW, you will later. That would tear a huge rip in the fabric of your relationship, ruining it forever.

It's best to do it now. This advice applies to her as well.

Answer 3

The only suggestion - and alternative - here is for you to be honest with her. This is probably going to mean you moving out, as I could not imagine a woman who has even an iota of self esteem letting you cheat on her while she is living with you, and calling you her bf.

I can understand your willingness to play the field for a while - you got into a very serious relationship quite young. However, you can't keep stalling her, otherwise it's going to end up worse. Don't hurt her feelings. Instead, take the steps to get the space you need.

Answer 4

I can understand wanting to explore your options, but if its great than see it through, minus the marriage and children. You two can enjoy each others company and grow with one another. The world is big and wondering. Don't get in the habit of relationship jumping. Trust me, that can go on for years and years. Why jump ship if the trip is going well and the boat hasn't sunk. There is a lot of fun in exploring but something "better" may not neccessarily be out there.

You have plenty of time for marriage and kids, get to know one another.

Answer 5

You are 19. Get out and see things first. You are to young to be getting married. Look at the divorce rate as it is. Do you want to be 24 and already have a divorce on your hands or be the parent to someone. You have to be sure that is what you want. If it isn't then you need to explain to her that you are not ready for that. She is not going to like it and will play all kinds of games but be strong and take control. It is your life you need to worry about not hers. Trust me I have been there..

Answer 6

it is very common for people to be with their first time for a long time, and wonder about what else is out there. i think everyone in long term relationships do that at one time or another. you just need to think about it. is your 3yr relationship worth throwing away just to get with another woman? and with all the diseises out there, why would you want to explore if your in a committed relationship? The grass isnt always greener on the other side, as the saying goes. If you really feel this is something you have to do, you need to talk to her about it. dont lie and tell her you need space or whatever, just come out and say that you love her, but you want to see what it would be like to be single. you also have to remember though, that if you go exploring, she will to and may not be there when you come back. its a sticky situation. tell her what is on your mind. if its meant to be it will be and if you really want out, or you want to break up for awhile, you need to tell her. but dont be surprised if things are never the same again when you do get back together.

Answer 7

That "wonder" is not going to go away. You're going to have to either

1) end this relationship and get your wild phase over with and be prepared for her to do the same. Are you going to want her back after she's been with other guys?

2) Be prepared to live with "the wonder" of what other girls are like. If you are okay with that then i say stick with this girl if you love her.

Answer 8

Don't let her push you into getting married just so you won't lose her. I know someone who did that very thing and later on he couldn't stop himself from "exploring" and that he was married now, didn't matter... This feeling you've got isn't going to go away, so don't ignore it for her sake and for your own.

Answer 9

Well you are still young, dude, live your life, after kids you age faster. Obviously your gf a big planner tell her how you feel and 'explore' more women. Cuz, your still young, so live your life, member you are own boss. (That sounded really corny)

Answer 10

well, you lead her to believe that she had a cull ride cahnce at being your wife and everything else when yall moved in together, but just tell her that you want to take it slow and that your not fully ready for that type of commitment with any girl right now (unless you are) and if you are then just tell her before you take your realationship to next big step that you want to make sure she is the one for you...

Answer 11

You are too young to be so serious. I do not think you are ready for commitment if you want to be with other people. If you are willing to let go of your current gf and possibly lose her then break free.