got a lazy (18yr) nephew and will not go out and get a job and support himself ?he only lives with family members because he has no were else to go.how do we tell him to stop being lazy, tried to tell him straight out but he is not motivated to do anything just wants to sit around and do nothing unless you are right there yelling at him. i want him to join the army to help him out, but he says he must wait 6mos. to retake a test. what do we do in the mean time? we even have a hard time to get him to shower, even told him "you stink take a shower!" goes in one ear and out the other. we are getting at the end of our rope with him. but he is finially off the drugs (we hope and pray anyway)he will not get his ged. i hope someone has some advise to help us keep our sanity, if we kicked him out he will sure go back to drugs and drinking and end back up into jail only this time it's adult jail. we can't really trust him with his lies but family should stick together we believe ANY ADVISE?
2006-06-08 10:43:17 · 11 answers · asked by montanamom 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Tough love is the only way. But you can't make anyone be motivated. He's got to want it on his own.
2006-06-08 10:52:13 · answer #1 · answered by ? 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Quit enabling him. He's 18, time to get tough. Give him an ultimatum, either he gets a job or gets back in school full time or he gets out of the house. If he goes back to drugs and drinking that really is his choice, sometimes they have to hit bottom before they can begin to come back up.
Best wishes
2006-06-08 10:48:57 · answer #2 · answered by Badkitty 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope. no longer each toddler in u . s . a . is lazy or gets issues handed to them on a silver platter. My son has worked night shift in maintenance scrubbing the filthy loos for the final 3 years. working to place himself by college. This week and next he would be working picking peaches on the close by fruit orchard. He picked strawberries there till now contained in the season. There are nevertheless childrens that understand which you will desire to artwork at regardless of activity you may get to assist your self. thankfully our close by orchard will basically hire close by help and could in no way hire an unlawful. supplies the infants around right here of challenge.
2016-09-28 05:02:05 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No more meals, no more laundry service or clean sheets and towels, etc. You can even change the locks and put him out since he doesn't pay rent. Pile up all of his belongings outside. It's tough love and it is for his benefit. You are enablers by allowing him to mooch off of you. Toss his worthless butt out. The free ride is over.
2006-06-08 10:49:11 · answer #4 · answered by notyou311 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Those under your roof have to abide by your rules. Set the rules. Then, set an action plan with deadlines for when things have to be done.
All the best.
BTW, They don't hear the "stinky" part unless a girl they like tells them.
2006-06-08 10:55:45 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was lazy many years ago and wouldn't do - my mother finally out of love hurt my feelings which in turn caused me to lose 150 pounds....went to work at not one but two full time jobs and 2 part time jobs.
I was in my twenties...I loved her dearly and it hurt her more to hurt my feelings than it hurt me - however - after seeing the hurt in her eyes is what caused me to wake up and become my own person.
2006-06-08 10:50:54 · answer #6 · answered by Grandfather Oak 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its gonna be ruff but hes gotta go even if he does get back on the drugs n booze again . when he finally hits rock bottom! might take a week might take years but hes gotta go!
2006-06-08 10:50:58 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell everyone to quit supporting his lazy ***! Tough love is his only hope!!!
2006-06-08 10:54:13 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
TELL HIM ITS TIME TO BE AN ADULT.
2006-06-08 10:48:03 · answer #9 · answered by Vi_PrInCeSs305 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
take away his computer
2006-06-08 10:50:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋