Why does life hurt?

Question

I am so lonely and sad.. This is not how it is supposed to be? I just cannot be happy. I don't know how to make this go away.

Answer 1

give it time...life is all about changes...some days are good..some days are bad.....it will pass.....also, maybe you could try a counselling center to help you find out what is at the core of your depression....it's helpful if you don't know the causes...even if you do, it's helpful to have someone experienced listen and guide you through your feelings.. good luck and god bless

Answer 2

You are not alone. It is like Sting's song "Message in a Bottle." He sent out an s.o.s. in a bottle and there were a hundred million more bottles that washed ashore. It's crazy, but the saying about a person living in a city of millions and still being alone is entirely possible and common. It's just hard to make friends. They take a lot of time and energy to create and are too easily lost. Being married can also create an exclusive situation. That can be tough if you don't love the other person like you are supposed to to really be happy.

Answer 3

Well first of all you are in charge of your own feelings and the hardest part about that is you are responsible for your own happiness, for example;
If some one calls you a jerk you can either get mad or laugh at them it's your decision, so you decide what kind of mood your going to be in no matter what is said to you.
secondly, It's nobody's job to make you happy so you have to do this also on your own, so here's a couple of hints that might help.
Number one, Your boredom is usually caused because you want someone special in your life and you can't seem to find any one that makes you feel that special way, well it's not because your unapealing or any thing like that it's just that you aren't connected with people like yourself.
So here's what you do first thing is grab a shower and a bite to eat and head out that front door, only this time with a mission, you have a computer to open the world to you. Find your one interest that is yours and no one elses, that one part of you that is just you, then get on out that door and become part of it, when you get there you will see people just like your self doing the same thing your doing, becoming themselves. These people will have something in common with you and you can now have a new source of friends and even companionship.
Take charge of who you are and remember, you are the boss of your own happiness so give your self a raise, who knows you just might meet a second friend just like you met me, Preacher_mad_scientist and you can write me anytime, Peace.

Answer 4

Judging by your other questions, I would guess that the reason life hurts is because you have some things happening in your life that are making you unhappy, and you lack the appropriate mechanisms for dealing with those things.

You say your husband has lost interest in sex and you find yourself fantasizing about other men. That is a problem that can be resolved by talking to your husband and if he can't explain why he is not interested in sex (ie stress at work, problems with kids/parents/golf partner/you), suggest he see a doctor. Could he be satisfying this urge elsewhere? If so, do you want to stay married to him, or send him on his way so that you can find someone who respects and appreciates you. That may hurt now, but it's better to take the big hurt now than to have moderate sized doses of hurt administered every day for the rest of your life.

You say you are overweight but "don't have a lot of money to spend losing weight". You don't have to spend money to lose weight. Do you own a pair of sneakers? Put them on every morning and every evening and walk briskly for 30-60 minutes. When you go to the grocery store, don't even walk down the aisle with the potato chips, the one with the ice cream, or the one with the cookies. Go first to the fruit and vegetable aisle, and buy some good green veggies. Then buy some lean meat. Don't buy any rice, pasta, or potatoes. Put two helpings of veggie on your plate instead of a starch, and make sure you eat all of the veggies before you are done eating the meat, so that if you are going to fill up on something, it is vegetables, and if you have something left on your plate, it is the meat. If you're going to snack, snack on raw carrots, unsalted peanuts, cottage cheese, or an apple. If you're drinking full fat milk, switch to 2% (it's cheaper), and after a few weeks, to 1% (still cheaper) and eventually to skim (the cheapest yet, and no fat!). None of these changes will cost any more money at the grocery store. If you're in a hurry for a meal, don't go to the drive thru window at your local artery barricade joint. Keep sandwich fixins on hand at home and make a quick sandwich when you are on the go, or pour yourself a bowl of cereal with skim milk and a piece of fruit. Nobody says a dinner plate has to have three things on it. You can do cereal, or a piece of fruit and a cup of yogurt, if you're pressed for time.

And finally, get outside of yourself. The best way to stop feeling sad is to find something to do that will fill up the time you are now spending feeling sorry for yourself. Find a hobby you enjoy. It doesn't have to be expensive. Go to the library and take out a few books, and join a book club. You'll meet new people and have something to do. Plant some vegetables in your yard and spend some time every day taking care of them. As an added bonus, you'll have free food once they get going. Volunteer at a nursing home, animal shelter, school for special needs children, homeless shelter, or soup kitchen. Once you see how many people out there would love to be in your shoes, and once you have an activity that takes you outside your self, you'll feel better.

Answer 5

I'm in the same situation. I'm very lonely and very unhappy with my life. I find that doing things with friends and family helps keep your mind off the things that are bothering me. I dont have many friends and I don't live near much family. But I'm trying my best. Keep your chin up high. Don't let life drag you down. And whatever it is that has made you sad will make you stronger in the end.

Answer 6

First of all you don't believe in yourself... You are the only person that can make yourself happy.... It seems to me you're not putting forth effort to go out and have fun... It's more to life than you think.. Always remember there is someone out here worse off than you, homeless, starving,blind,deaf amongst many other things and they still have will power if they can you can...Feeling sad and sorry for yourself will only get you where you are now.Life is too short live and let live...

Answer 7

Look at the positive side...People are way worse then you... I know I dont know you...But there are people being killed daily, for reasons little as the wrong race...your still living and enjoy being single you can do what you want! I use to be like you when my first love and I broke up...I went to the doctor after 8 months and they dave me depressent pills...it helped tremendously....Now Im happy and I have moved on...Im not saying your depressed but its a posibility! I hope you can find the bright side...There is a rainbow at the end of every storm!!!!

Answer 8

Well, it happens to all of us. So the 1st thing to realize is; you are ceratinly NOT alone.

You need to talk to someone about why you feel the way you do. Perhaps they can make suggestions, knowing your situation better, to help you rise out of the funk you are in.

In any event, don't give up. Life is a series of hills and valleys. You're just in a long, deep valley, right now. But the road always rises out again. :)

Peace!

Answer 9

happiness is not a state where you arrive at, but a matter of traveling...
you can have all the riches in the world and still be unhappy. but you can be as poor as a mouse, but be content and satisfied with what you have -- now, THAT's important.
this sounds like depression. i was there too... some people describe it as walking in a tunnel with no light in the end. i describe it as living in a manhole, seeing people walk above you and you are all alone in that manhole. i was so sad, i envied everybody i saw -- even my mother, sister, friends etc. i envied them, because they don't feel the emptiness that i felt inside. depression comes to you... i don't want to be depressed. even when it feels like you're fighting it, it's very powerful and will find its way inside you. if somebody were to offer me drugs, i would have easily abused it at that time, just to make the emptiness and the sadness go away. somehow i am lucky to have friends and concerned family members who guided me through it. first, you have to recognize that you are not alone. i am concerned enough to reply and answer your problem. i've been there and i wanted to share with you what's it like to be there. try talking to a genuine friend. or if you have a family member whom you can trust, try talking to her too. i talked to my aunt, and we have become close ever since.

Answer 10

One way to make sadness go away is think about the things you are thankful for. Hurt doesn't last forever, even though sometimes if feels that way.

Answer 11

You need to figure out what you enjoy in life. Surround yourself with like minded people and build a network of friends based on the things you like to do. Go on line and meet new people that will bring a healthy mind set to your life. Gat counciling and be good to yourself.