Why is it that so many parents blame everybody else for their childrens mistakes. How do you correct it?

Question

I read the news paper alot and watch the news and it seems that more and more parents blame their childrens lack of education or morals or characters on everything else besides themselves? When will they start facing their failures in their children's lives

Answer 1

In a lot of cases it is because the parents themselves haven't a clue as to what went wrong.

They have spent the better part of their children's lives parking the kids in front of a television with either a movie or video game to keep the child occupied and out of their hair. They do not monitor what their child(ren) are watching or playing to make sure it is age appropriate.

As parents, they cry that their hands are tied when it comes to discipline, because of the interference of CPS; when in fact they are just too lazy to want to discipline their child. Most parents are worried about damaging a childs psyche, horse manure, children thrive on structure and discipline, it gives them a sense of security and belonging.

There are ways of disciplining a child that are almost as effective as the spankings that we received when we were children growing up and no, "time out" isn't one of them.

If the behavior warrants harsh discipline, then by all means employ harsh discipline, however, do not beat your child. I have never seen evidence that spanking a child teaches a child to hit others; nor has washing their mouths out with soap ever caused irreparable harm. Standing in a corner for minor offenses gives them time to think about their actions and besides, it will bore them to tears.

When parents QUIT trying to be their children's friend and instead take control of their own home and children then society as a whole will be much better off. When they teach their child right from wrong, real from make-believe, manners and morals, then maybe we will have a snowballs chance in Hell of having a world that is worth living in, until then, we as individuals, just have to do our best in raising our own children to have manners, morals and integrity.

Answer 2

Maybe a better question would be; Why can't parents raise their children the way they use to, without the government sticking their nose into it and trying to tell them how? Back when I was being raised children were taught to respect their elders on matter their race, or color if not we got a hickory switch across or legs. Now you are not allowed to discipline were children in anyway except time out, what in the world it time out. Children go to their rooms where they have TVs, VCRs, Telephones , and the list goes on. What kind of discipline is that. Children are allowed ot sue their parents and DIVORCE them, can you imagine what would have happen 40 years ago if I had sayed something like that to my parents. I would be eating my meals though a straw. I could go on and on about this, but I hope you get the picture.

Answer 3

Its not just parents. Society as a whole prefers to shirk responsibility rather than point the finger at themselves.. it is much easier to be a “victim” where it is NEVER your fault and to blame someone else. Plain and simple. It used to be we actually took responsibility for what we did and we knew there were consequences.. and we paid the price. But even know. you will get people who get busted and when being sent to jail they blame it on everyone except themselves. Oh it was my upbringing. My peers etc. the bottom line is no matter your circumstances.. YOU and you alone make the choices for your life. There may be outside influences. BUT the choice is yours alone. Parents these days prefer to be their child’s best friend and not be the adult and be the example.

Answer 4

There should be a new law that requires people to pass rigorous written exam in order to qualify to become parents. And it should be renewable, sort of like when you get your drivers license. You should have to take parenting ed classes and get a permit first that shows that you have the minimum required common sense and level of responsibility before you can apply to take the test for your parenting license. And you should only be allowed to take the test once.

Here's the kicker: If you fail the test for your parenting license, you should have a tatoo on your forhead that says "do not breed". Sort of like a USDA rejection stamp. This will eliminate all of the finger-pointing and help place the blame for poor parenting where it belongs; on the parents.

If you don't plan to raise them, then don't have them.

Answer 5

When the liberals quit encouraging them to blame "society" for their problems.

That's been the excuse for everything from juvenile deliquency to conception problems for the last 40 years, and the last two generations of people now believe it. Nothing is anyone's personal responsibility any more, it's all someone (or some entity's) fault.

Answer 6

This is one of the signs of societal breakdown -- lack of responsibility for one's own actions. Parents AND children need to take responsibility.

I think the tide is changing though. The Gen Xers are more strict and traditional with their children. They don't want another generation of Gen Yers on their hands!

Answer 7

It's much easier to blame others instead of teaching and disciplining your children. Some parents think they can be friends with their kids instead of taking charge. It never works and the kids are spoiled.

Answer 8

If the children did the wrong, what their parents say is irrelevant.
They should only be allowed to listen to what their children have to say for their wrongdoings.

Answer 9

Parents are insercure they try to do there best to raise their children right by telling them not to do drug, be in a gang,or go out and shoot somebody.

Answer 10

Most likely they blame someone for everything that is not right for them in their life.