Shouldn't feminism promote the masculine?

Question

Everybody performs better in a task or occupation that he, (or she) is proud of. When we are proud of a job, we tend to put more effort into it. We do it with joy. However, when we are ashamed or discouraged about a job, we tend to neglect or resent it. However, men who are proud of their masculine jobs as "provider", "man of the house" are often mocked, and called chauvanistic. Wouldn't proud men better help the family, society, and women?

Isn't a man more proud of his position as "man of the house" more prone to interest and participation in the house? Isn't a man who is proud of his fatherhood more prone to fulfilling his fatherly duties? Isn't a man proud of being the "provider" more likely to enojoy providing for his wife and children?

I believe there would be far less abandoned mothers and children. Men would be more faithful. I believe that proud men make for a better future for families, society, and women. Do you agree? Wheather or not you do, please explain.

Thank you.

Answer 1

From what I can tell, the early feminist movement was mostly a “valid” response to decades of masculine hubris and insensitivity towards women in general. I think (if I'm taking the optimistic approach)( in their frustration and anger, they simply swung to the other extreme.

Finally people are really starting to examine the issue of what gender is, how it impacts our thinking and behavior, and what’s a realistic positive relationship between men and women.

It’s pretty clear that healthy men take pride in their achievements. They usually seek independence early on as children, and derive pleasure from being able to do things well or achieve goals. They often show their love for others in indirect ways, by doing good work, providing resources that they’ve earned, and the like; interpersonal sharing is a little harder for them. To encourage a man to do the things he does well for others (rather than putting his efforts down or demeaning them in some way) seems to be common sense.

I also think it’s easy for a man to feel disconnected from his family, or remain impersonal out of emotional safety. He needs encouragement to fit into the family, find a role he’s good at, look at himself (rather than just his wife) as equally responsible for the family’s success.

If he feels that his efforts and decisions are respected by the people he loves, if he feels his work is directly appreciated by and useful to them, he will engage more in the family. This is a good thing – the wife doesn’t feel alone as much, she feels loved, and the kids feel valued and loved and now have a strong male role model.

A man who can’t take pride in his contributions to his family usually ends up looking for something to make him feel better about his life – whether that means just chasing fun pastimes or even other women. The more you can “cement” him into the family structure, the better for himself and his family.

I don’t think the woman has to put herself down or be a slave to her husband to achieve this. Women are more nurturing; they know better how to encourage others, integrate them into relationships, communicate on a personal level, see the needs of the people rather than the work, and so forth.

A woman can use these strengths to benefit the family and integrate the husband better into the family, without losing any sense of competence, value, or stepping on the man’s toes… even if she does work outside the home. A strong woman knows how to nurture everyone in the family…. including herself. She doesn't have to devalue herself, or let others devalue her, in the process of supporting the people she loves.

Answer 2

I think that everyone's contributions to society and their family should be recognized and valued equally, period. It doesn't matter what that contribution is or whether you're a man or a woman. If a woman can support a family, good for her. If a man can cook and raise the children, good for him. If a man can support a family, good for him. If a woman can cook and raise the children, good for her, too.

It's by devaluing one or the other of these contributions, or limiting what a person's role should be just because of gender, that we get into trouble.

Men should be proud of their role in the family, and women should be proud of them, too--as long as that role is one that both the man and woman are comfortable with, not just something that they have to do, and not something that results in one partner exercising power over the other.

We should all be proud of our partners, male or female, for whatever they choose to do!

Answer 3

Feminism does promote the masculine. It's about an equal partnership, not who's better than whom. I don't think that people that are a "provider" get mocked, it's when it starts to be "I'm the man of the house, I call the shots" that it is perceived as chauvanistic.

Answer 4

Men enjoy their masculine role .In fact men most of the time enjoy protecting women.Feminism is misplaced over enthusiasm of some. Women are like sweet flowers.They should not wither away in jobs and careers.Women are needed. They are the decision makers in a happy home.

Answer 5

Everyone needs to work together. Men need to help women and women need to help me. We are a society based on interdependency.